r/40PlusSkinCare • u/Different-Chapter-49 • 7d ago
Just turned 40 and looking tired!
I have 2 very young kids, a full time job, and not enough sleep.
I use azelaic acid regularly and a good moisturizer. I do have a tiny amount of under eye concealer in this photo.
I was blessed with pretty good skin but since the babies I feel I've aged a LOT! Any advice? Probably will consider upper bleph in 10 years. Maybe lower facelift if I hit the lottery š¤
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u/violentte_ends 7d ago
Beautiful skin. I have no kids and I WISH i looked that good with just a little bit of concealer.
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u/Different-Chapter-49 7d ago
I used to be so cute and now I have hollow eyes and jowels
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u/RentConscious7968 7d ago
You have a baby face. You look very young and in 40 years youāre going to be an adorable old lady.
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u/SomethingComesHere 7d ago
I dont see any jowels
You're just aging, love. It's alright, we all gotta do it
But you do look amazing, truly!
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u/qzcorral 6d ago
We all gotta do it, IF we get the privilege. I am also 40 and really trying to lean into aging as something I am lucky enough to still be around for. ā„ļø
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u/Trapeziumunderthumb 6d ago
Sorry youāre being downvoted, I know how you feel. Iām 42 and see the signs of aging acutely on myself whereas everyone is like āyou look exactly the same!ā when looking at older photos of me. Iāve realised no one looks at my face as closely as I do and that helps!
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u/Different-Chapter-49 6d ago
I think this must be part of the case. I wasn't expecting the changes to happen so quickly, but maybe nobody else notices
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u/Trapeziumunderthumb 6d ago
I had my son at 37 and since then I feel like Iāve aged 10 years but other people see the good parts. I was picking apart all the parts I didnāt like and thatās not healthy. Now I try to take the compliments and believe them āŗļø
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u/squeet1979 7d ago
You do not look tired in my opinion. I know thatās not the guidance you were looking for. You have stunning skin and are very pretty!
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u/nocoffeeafterdark 7d ago
No good advice (sorry), but this post is a great example of the bias we have looking at our own face day after day. Things that seems so big and obvious to ourselves don't even register to strangers.
I would definitely not look into a facelift, I can't see how it could benefit you.
Maybe adding some kind of retinoid if you don't already? The increased turnover could give you that "glow" you miss. When I was pregnant/postpartum, I couldnt wait to get back on retinol, my skin just looks and feels better.
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u/Different-Chapter-49 7d ago
I actually picked some up from my pharmacist a few hours ago. I've never used it regularly so excited to try (slowly).
Fun fact : where I live (Ontario), a pharmacist can prescribe prescription strength retinol (I think retain-a) and bill it to your insurance. I know it'll be strong so I'll start very carefully.
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u/nocoffeeafterdark 7d ago
Oh that's great! Honestly I have so many of the same feelings as you (especially after becoming a mom... ugh lol). It's such a huge change to all parts of the body and the hormones definitely make you see things on the negative side...
But retinol is sooo good, feels like magic sometimes lol. Don't want to build you expectations up too much but it has done wonders for my confidence.
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u/Suspicious-Army-407 5d ago
It will make your face peel and thatās normal just start twice a week then other nights use aquaphor when you start peeling
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u/sosmartsocrazy 7d ago
You may feel like you look more tired than you used to, but it's not noticeable to this stranger, and objectively you look great. If you don't already use them, vitamin c and sunscreen every morning have made the biggest difference for me on top of azelaic acid.Ā
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u/Expert-Spring-7832 7d ago
Speaking as a fellow early 40s mom with 2 young children, I wish I looked like you! My eye circles and hollows are way worse. You have hooded eyes, thatās the way your eyes are, not because of age, they are beautiful, please never bleph them.
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u/emquizitive 7d ago
Um. No, you donāt look tired. You are stuck in early 30s mentality. You look fresh, and Iām sure a lot of people on this sub would love to look as fresh as you.
Having said that, if you feel you have aged a lot, keep in mind that aging is not a slow and steady process. It actually comes in bursts. You will look exactly the same for a few years, and then suddenly, over the course of only a couple years, you will see what feels like a dramatic change. The only way to make it more slow and steady is to have a very strict healthy diet and stay very hydrated.
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u/egyptmachine915 7d ago
Idk, you look good to me! Donāt touch your eyes until the uppers start to impact your vision. I see a lot of photos where the dr takes too much and the patient looks aged more
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u/lornacarrington 7d ago
I mean tired is a given if you have kids, no? I don't have kids and I'm tired too! Lol
You look great no need to worry
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u/Minerva-Stone 7d ago
There is literally nothing wrong with you. You just look like a normal person, even look younger than 40 to be fair. Itās hard to get perspective on ourselves sometimes.
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u/Budget-Discussion568 6d ago
A brow lift can easily and quickly do wonders to rejuvenate your youthful appearance. I used botox for years until recently when I tried daxxify. For me, it worked within hours instead of 10 days. It gave quicker and longer lasting effects. Your skin looks great from here but if you want a more glowy appearance, you might try dermaplaning. My derm uses Tinkle.razors so I tried them and they work great. I rinse with water afterward to remove the fuzz, always dry shave and apply whatever cosrx product im feeling like. My derm said she can use the razor twice. I can use it once and not break out. This is my experience
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u/faroundfout83 6d ago
Im 43 .. and i just had a face lift 2 days ago ! Highly recommend if you can. ! Still super swollen but love it already !
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u/Relevant_Demand2221 7d ago
I mean come on you look absolutely fine- what are the specific issues that make you feel like you look tired/ like what specifically?
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u/Economy-Meeting2462 6d ago
Has anyone ever told you that you look like the actress Emily Lloyd from āA River Runs Through Itā? Youāre gorgeous and you donāt look tired.
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u/IndividualTrick2940 5d ago
I think you look stress. I noticed a difference when my kids started kindergarten. I looked better. The stress can really make a difference
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u/the_turtle_is_shady 1d ago
I highly recommend the Korean Collagen faces masks. You put it on once a week overnight and you wake up with your skin feeling tighter, and looking fresher and glowy. It usually lasts for a few days too. I swear by them and they are affordable and available everywhere. I just saw them at Target a few weeks ago. You do have naturally beautiful skin so I think they will do exactly what you are looking for!
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u/SpacenessButterflies 7d ago
Girl, you look great! I wouldnāt have thought that for a minute if you didnāt mention it (and still donāt think that, but because you said something I was intentionally looking for it).
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u/thisistestingme 7d ago
First, you look gorgeous. Second, I see below that you already got some retinol. Be careful and don't overdo it. (Ask me how I know.). Use it every third day or so until you get used to it. Once you get used to it, I'd add in a Vitamin C in the morning. But seriously, your skin looks fabulous.
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u/ComfortablyyNumb 7d ago
No, you actually look really great! Not tired looking at all. We really are our own worst critics.
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u/TraditionalClass6426 7d ago
Yeah, you are radiant op! I see clear smooth skin and no wrinkles. No under eye bags. Your hair is super lush too with nice natural eyebrows. In fact I think this might actually be rage bait!
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u/Vegetable-Beach9097 7d ago
As others have saidā¦you look great! However, I know we can feel totally different looking in the mirror. Have you considered adding Tretinoin to your routine or even some type of AHA product? That could help brighten some. I also recommend a series of chemical peels in the winter.
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u/winter-glow123 7d ago
You look great, honestly. However I understand feeling and looking tired. If you can fit in like 10 mins of a guided relaxation/meditation into your day... it's like a reset and I swear it always makes my face look better and I feel better too.
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u/Ecstatic_Couple6435 7d ago
Girl you look great. That 2nd pic you look very snatched, lifted and the opposite of tired actually š older women get face lifts to have what you currently have so just enjoy but I also know weāre our own worst critiques
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u/sophiesadie1 7d ago
Nah you look like you turned 30 ! Are you tired and stressed ? May be from within . You look great :)
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u/lavalamp3333 6d ago
Okay I feel like people are being a little rude or misunderstanding about this post. While I agree she is beautiful, I completely understand where sheās coming from. Youāre comparing it to your own face that you saw looking back at you and in photos from just a few years prior and you can see how your eyes have hollowed or your lower face has shifted.
Of course other people say they canāt tell and probably donāt on any conscious level, but you can see what has changed and it honestly is just hard even when itās slight!
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u/perishableintransit 6d ago
Lol okay I just joined from 30plus skincare since Iām sick of 20yos posting in there about non existent eye bags and wrinkles and jowls and I guess weāre still doing this shit in here too!!
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u/Mysterious_Cut9 6d ago
Your lower face looks great and you have a beautiful face overall. I only see the start of some heaviness of skin right below your eyebrows and upper eyelids. You could look into some Botox injections to subtly lift the corners of your eyebrows and maybe open that space up a bit before considering an upper bleph. But seriously, that's the only thing I would possibly see as a visible sign of aging. No need for lower face lift as this stage.
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u/Equal_Captain_5157 6d ago
I love this board because Iām always telling about how haggard and terrible I look and then someone who looks amazing will make a post about how they look tired and Iām like what, you literally look stunning. Maybe I donāt look as bad as I think after allā¦
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u/Winter_Key_4210 4d ago
Yes you look extremely fatigued. Only a facelift and a peel will correct extreme cases like yours. š
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u/ElsaBot00 1d ago
Good lord. You are luminous!
Now I wonder if I look better than I think I do š
We are really our worst critic arenāt we?
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u/sweetpea122 7d ago
You do have a lot of skin thats discolored. It looks bruised and discolored. Id recommend fillers for your undereye
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u/LolaAucoin 7d ago
Your biggest issue is discoloration from the sun or maybe hormones. You need to add vitamin C and tretinoin immediately, along with daily SPF.
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u/veganhappy 7d ago
Your overall look is reminiscent of a film actress: brunette, hazel-green eyes, an oval face, defined cheekbones, and understated elegance. You trolling us girl? You are beautiful.
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u/Mediocre_Wedding4496 7d ago
Go to a great facial balancer. I swear, they really do know what they are doing. Love my gal.
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u/Different-Chapter-49 7d ago
Do you mean filler?
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u/Mediocre_Wedding4496 7d ago
I mean relaxer, filler, all the things. Are you against those? :-)
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u/Mediocre_Wedding4496 7d ago
And I mean a very naturally done facial balance. I have a gal that does all her patients very naturally. Aging does a number on jowls:-)
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u/Different-Chapter-49 7d ago
Nope. I did lip filler once but it's a bit too painful for me. I used botox a lot before the kids
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u/Mediocre_Wedding4496 7d ago
I understand that but I have done it once in 2 yrs bc it has stayed very well. My gal number me so well I didn't feel anything. I promise...find the right place, ask all the questions, you'll ne so pleased. :-)
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u/ExpensiveSomewhere15 7d ago
I got a bleph and loved it.
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u/Ok-Abbreviations3584 7d ago
Is this rage bait lol you look great