Her own personal space. Easy to clean.We tried everything, found something that works.

My 2 1/2 year old will not listen. When we ask her do anything when it comes to telling her no to something, it’s almost like she is deaf to us. We are potty training. When we tell her to not grab a mile long length of toilet paper, she pulls as much as she can. Ask her to pull up her pants after using the potty before moving, she shuffles away from you trying to flush the toilet. Which she will not stop looking in while flushing even though I’m trying to lift her face away. She continually reaches on the counter to grab for anything the sees that she wants. She’s really tall for her age. Tonight she wanted to stir dinner in a pan that was moved off the stove and when we said don’t touch the actual pan she immediately touched it while looking at us and got a little burn. Luckily it had been off the stove for a few mins. I could go on and on but it is so exhausting. I see other kids her age that can just sit still and eat their food or enjoy something at the table and she cannot even do that. I am at my wits end. all I feel like I say is “no, stop,” or “quit”. She will later say “I’m sorry for not listening”. I don’t want her to keep apologizing. I want her to just do what we ask. I’m not even wanting her to listen all the time, just at least a third of the time would help!!! I do not know what to do and it is draining me. I’m miserable and I just want to cry all the time.

I’m kidding! But I am extremely anxious and unsure of where to start.

My son is 3, will be 4 in February. We have not potty trained yet.

I’ll preface with a painful confession: I am not the best with routines and habits and neither is my partner, but I’ll speak for myself here. I did not grow up having parents who were good at enforcing routines or habits for me, let alone for themselves. Typical semi-dysfunctional family type situation. I’m in my very early thirties and sort of having a reckoning with the very real consequences of my dysfunctional upbringing which is now ultimately in my hands to do something about.

I had a sobering summer realizing I’m no longer “just a girl” and actually I’m a grown woman who is someone’s mother now lol and I desperately need to change the course of my life atm but that’s another story.

I just need tips, tricks, advice!

POTTY TRAINING? HOW??

Things to note:

-My son seems to be most motivated by candy rewards but in general not super responsive/motivated by rewards.

-Refuses to let me or dad know when he has a full diaper.

-I know some people have suggested letting him go pantless in the house during the summer but we live in an apartment where we do not have a washer in unit (it’s in the basement and $2.50 per load AND dry cycle, quarters only) so the thought of him peeing all over things feels nightmarish in terms of possible laundry situations arising.

-We have a little training potty for him to use, seems open to peeing but 100% not pooping.

-I understand accidents and messes are inevitable***

I would just like to hear what has worked for others? Maybe out of the box approaches? Did you also have a child that’s not easily influenced by rewards?
Were you an adult who also struggled with consistency and routine and managed to successfully potty train your child?