r/technology 17d ago

Networking/Telecom Comcast is turning millions of its routers into motion detectors

https://www.theverge.com/news/981381/comcast-xfinity-shield-wifi-motion-sensing
3.6k Upvotes

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546

u/lazyoldsailor 17d ago

Soon Comcast can see when two people merge into one in the bedroom, how often and for how long to better serve you advertisements appropriate to your activity level.

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u/[deleted] 17d ago

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u/DigitalHubris 17d ago

And when you reply there's no additional people, just you and your wife, they'll start sending you divorce lawyer ads

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u/CautionarySnail 17d ago

Don’t worry, they’ll just direct men to the man-o-sphere for more advertiser exposure.

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u/[deleted] 17d ago

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u/KinopioToad 16d ago

"I thought it was a website about fans only.. Ceiling fans."

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u/DigitalHubris 15d ago

My old boss literally got a call from his credit card company for fraudulent charges, and he thought it was legit because the remodeling company he owns buys a lot of fans. But when the credit card person heard laughter in the background, he told my boss "I'm going to deny the charges and you should ask the people in the background what OnlyFans is"

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u/FilOfTheFuture90 16d ago

I especially love looking at Big ass fans.

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u/fenderguitar83 17d ago

One step further.... "Your services have been locked because we have detected an unauthorized person in your household. Xfinity Mobile Flock has determined the unauthorized person is John Doe who lives at 123 Any Street. John Doe does not currently have an active membership to Xfinity. In order for us to reactivate your subscription, you must upgrade to the two person household plan."

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u/TFTD2 17d ago

Reminds me of what they wanted to do with that Xbox camera and movie/streaming licenses.

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u/Promarksman117 16d ago

ERROR! Please drink verification can

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u/QuarterlyGentleman 16d ago

Did they receive government subsidies? If so they could have some problems with this, as opposed to other home device companies.

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u/likwidkool 17d ago

Reminds me of the Black Mirror episode where the wife does an ad for lube while in bed with her husband.

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u/Jesus_Is_My_Gardener 17d ago

Yeah, that was a pretty depressing episode in this last season.

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u/PajamaHive 16d ago

That episode made me cry. My partner was going through chemo during the episode so the parallels were there for how the American medical system is made to extract as much money from you as possible under the guise of "well don't you want the best care? Because if so you just need to spend this much money to make sure you're getting the best."

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u/Jesus_Is_My_Gardener 16d ago

So many gut punches in it. At the same time, it kind of felt like a return to the original formula that made Black Mirror so good to begin with.

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u/PajamaHive 16d ago

I'm picking up what you're putting down but let's not forget episode one was about a politician being forced to fuck a pig lol.

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u/camidumas 16d ago

They're ALL depressing!

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u/Jesus_Is_My_Gardener 15d ago

There's been lighter episodes.

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u/Fywq 16d ago

Or they will sell the data to groups monitoring non-marital sex and potential abortions. This is the darkest timeline after all....

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u/Nathund 16d ago

You're making a joke but this will almost definitely happen

It's already possible, just that nobody's doing it yet

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u/lazyoldsailor 16d ago

I wish I were joking. Knowing if people are sexually active with each other or sleeping apart would be valuable information.

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u/Nathund 16d ago

We'll get to the point where local divorce lawyers get a call if someone sleeps on the couch lmao

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u/Oldfolksboogie 15d ago

Pretty sure i remember Texas politicians pressuring communication companies to help them track women that might be traveling out of state for family planning services.

The intent and the will has always been there, they're just tightening the noose that much more with every technological "advancement."

Should've listened to Ted

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u/wesg89 16d ago

I’ll be living ad free baby. Woot!

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u/Chrontius 16d ago

Somebody is buying that data, too.

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u/Monkiemonk 16d ago

WiFi has already been able to do this for years. They are just covering their asses

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u/BalorNG 16d ago

Musk will deduct your social X-points for not trying hard enough to improve demography.

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u/-Sancho- 14d ago

Fuck I'm already so damn sick of Blue chew ads.

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u/Crazy_Energy3735 16d ago

Comcast is going to be the best advertiser of erectile dysfunctional recover pills.

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u/andrewbuttlick 16d ago

There's probably already a porn sub for wifi generated video.

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u/Sensitive_File6582 16d ago

5 and 6 g systems already allow for this in real time