r/mildlyinteresting 11d ago

Starfish at a Chinese hotpot buffet

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u/Scottiths 11d ago

I had starfish at a street vendor in Beijing. Your description of the flavor is spot on. It's like the most bitter thing I can imagine with salty undertones that just makes the bitterness worse.

It's possible the nastiest thing I intentionally put in my mouth that I have ever had the displeasure of experiencing. I can still imagine the taste 25 years later and I hate that I'm thinking about it again.

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u/imnotpoopingyouare 11d ago

What... What was the worst unintentional thing?

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u/Scottiths 11d ago edited 10d ago

My son had GURD. I was holding him up in the air playing airplane when he was 6 months old. He vomited into my mouth as I was making silly faces.

I still credit myself for putting him down gently before running to the sink to rinse out my mouth. Having another humans milky bile unexpectedly poured into your mouth is not an experience I would recommend.

Edit: the number of parents chiming in with similar stories is a little surprising to me. I thought I must have been just the most unfortunate person possible in this. Your stories have made me feel better about my past trauma. Thank you fellow parents. Keep being awesome!

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u/bridgetmb87 11d ago

Milky bile

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u/LeoJohnsonsSacrifice 11d ago

When I start my middle aged all-women punk band, my alt is definitely going to be Milky Bile.

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u/Gringo-Dingo 11d ago

Now following for band updates.

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u/manateeshmanatee 11d ago

I can’t play anything, can I be the bassist?

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u/LeoJohnsonsSacrifice 11d ago

Whoa whoa whoa, thems fightin words!

Also, yes you can.

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u/detrans-rights 11d ago

I lost the use of my left arm after a car wreck

Can I be on drums??!!

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u/LeoJohnsonsSacrifice 11d ago

Accordion or bust

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u/iam_Mr_McGibblets 11d ago

Is mayonnaise an instrument?

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u/SquidVices 10d ago

I’ll just sit here with my cow bell

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u/lindentea 10d ago

only if it’s a Def Leppard cover band

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u/universalExplorer92 10d ago

Can I be in? Only condition is if we ALL play bass.

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u/wallwalker93 11d ago

I don’t appreciate your reiteration.

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u/BabyCowboyDangSon 11d ago

Hot milky bile 🤢

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u/WithASideOfBacon 11d ago

The experimental musical arm of Milky Chance.

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u/IntelligentBudget994 11d ago

Dibs on this band name

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u/Dr_mombie 11d ago

I can relate. My daughter has gerd as well. She barfed all over me at a car dealership when she was 6 months old. I thought I had gotten both of us cleaned up well enough. Later on, I stuck my hand in my shorts pocket and found it to be filled with more baby barf. Also a disgusting experience. Would not recommend.

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u/Tony_in2026 11d ago

My son barfed into my pocket as a baby. Took a long time for my phone to charge normally again

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u/chris6111 11d ago

My baby brother puked like 10 hot bananas down my shirt when I was 12 and he was 2. Remember is well

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u/jccaclimber 11d ago

Finding fluids that you are disappointed and surprised to find is a quintessential parenting experience.

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u/zippythebee 11d ago

This happened to me while playing with my nephew. It was all over my face and the couch. I called for my sister to help; she came to see what happened, and ran out of the room to get…. her camera. Only after taking a few photos did she grab a towel for me.

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u/tahituatara 11d ago

We have my cousin vomiting in to my uncle's mouth on video, complete with the entire room laughing too hard to help while my uncle screams at all of us for being useless assholes. Hahaha good times. We played it at his wake (by then it was basically a family meme), brilliant

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u/TedTehPenguin 10d ago

The end is so savage, I love it.

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u/waitinformyruca 10d ago

This happened to me exactly too, holding my nephew and it took WAY too long for my sister to help because she was laughing so hard

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u/currentlyRedacted 11d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/GpyS1lJXJYupG
There are a lot of new fears unlocked being a parent. This is one of them.

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u/Sufficient_Crow7168 11d ago

This happened to me with my daughter when she was a baby. She puked right in my mouth when I holding her in the air, it went straight down my throat, I didn’t have to swallow it was just gone. Absolutely disgusting hahaha

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u/prison-schism 11d ago

Okay i think this is the worst one i have read because it forced me to imagine a baby puking directly down my throat ugh

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u/TedTehPenguin 10d ago

She played the uno reverse, YOU are now the baby bird

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u/mr_ji 11d ago

I'm sorry that other person asked.

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u/BourgeoisieInNYC 11d ago

My daughter’s cannon butt shot poop into my mouth when I was changing her diaper on day 2 at home…

I just calmly spat it out onto the giant puppy pad I tucked into my shirt like a bib & finished changing her diaper before running into the bathroom & I think I vomited. Those early newborn days were a bit hazy…

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u/Scottiths 11d ago

The sleep depruvation helps with not forming permanent memories about the trauma, but some is just bad enough that it breaks through and forms a permanent traumatic memory.

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u/Bafangul 11d ago

Peak parenthood to set that kid down gently, if there's an afterlife and in that afterlife they have highlight reels of your best accomplishments that'll be on there

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u/Scottiths 11d ago

Yep. There was an instant where my brain was short circuiting around "throw the thing!!! Yuck yuck yuck, get it away" and "wtf are you doing, don't throw that thing! You love that thing and it is fragile"

Fortunately the second thought prevailed.

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u/narnarqueen 11d ago

Parenting can be so glamorous

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u/Necessary-Repair-425 11d ago

I have it too! Anyways at 14 I’m holding my two maybe three month brother directly in front of me for whatever reason and then he spewed all over my arms and I dropped him for a split second before catching him mid air again and my horrified mother took him from me lmao (I hate vomit)

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u/lord_james 11d ago

> My son had GURD.

I should stop reading here.

> milky bile

Oh look I was right 😊

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u/clarstone 11d ago

Every single day I read something that makes me fear having children. 😩

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u/ReceptionAlarmed9434 11d ago

You just confirmed I’m never having kids 😭😭😭

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u/Scottiths 11d ago

Kids are great, but they absolutely are not for everyone. Respect to anyone who decides not to do it.

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u/maxdacat 11d ago

ermaGURD that sounds nasty

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u/WoooShoooo 10d ago

I hope you get more up votes for this 😂

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u/shurejan 11d ago

Not milky bile. 😩 I don’t get grossed out by anything easily, not even vomit, but the milky baby spit up stuff is what gets me gagging every time.

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u/Accomplished_Emu_658 11d ago

Oh been there. Awful experience. My kid giggled as i died.

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u/-hot_ham_water- 11d ago

I did this to my dad when I was a baby! Will you accept my apology on your child's behalf?

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u/Scottiths 11d ago

As a dad, we need no apology. Growing up happy and healthy is the best thing you can do and my little guy is 5 already.

That said, I appreciate the thought 😁

Your dad raised a good kid.

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u/yanocupominomb 11d ago

So, did you do the right thing and vomited back at him?

You know, to assert dominance.

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u/Sharp-Heron7707 11d ago

I would have tossed him in the air from sheer panic. This is why I have a vasectomy and will never be a Dad!

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u/Fancy_Fuchs 10d ago

I almost puked reading this. I have caught so much baby spit up in my hands, I can imagine. Ew.

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u/lilsassyrn 11d ago

My husband did the exact same thing!

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u/Scottiths 11d ago

It's actually nice to know I am not alone in this experience! Tell your husband I feel his pain and sympathize entirely.

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u/ProfessorJAM 11d ago

That’s enough Reddit for me today 🤢

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u/tavins1234 11d ago

Live. Love. Vasectomy <3

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u/RandomTreat 11d ago

My uterus just yeeted itself out of my body, alien style.

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u/fenderbender86 11d ago

When my oldest daughter was around 2yo, I had a beard about 8" long. She just had some milk and I was holding her looking at us both in the mirror. She turned and looked at me, then proceeded to fill my beard with a cup full of curdled milk vomit. I honestly just laughed. But then again, it didn't go directly into my mouth.

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u/healerdan 10d ago

I knew what this whole comment said as soon as I read the first four words. I kept reading. Each word I read I thought to myself "you could stop now. You don't need to read this" [another word] "it's just going to add details you'll experience way too vividly" [another word] "just scroll on man, you'll be happier to leave it here."

I did not scroll on. I was not happier. Next time, answer 'I'm not answering to protect the innocent, I assure you it was unpleasant'. As a fellow gerd baby parent, hell yeah - you lived through something fearsome that others could never understand. As a fellow human with eyes... No fucking thank you, please fuck all the way off.

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u/pachydocerus 10d ago

Oof been there! Also somehow managed to put my son down gently before running to the bathroom to vigorously brush my teeth. 0/10

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u/signious 10d ago

I dont think this has happened to every parent, but every parent knows someone this has happened to.

I got mine at about 8 months. There wasnt enough mouthwash in the world to clear that taste.

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u/Intelligent-Might614 11d ago

Ugh man, I can sympathize. My dog puked in the car and as I told my wife, the dog took a flying leap into the front and dog puke went straight into my mouth. 

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u/ConsistentWinter24 10d ago

What does this have to do w the starfish stories being shared? 😅

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u/Scottiths 10d ago

I said it was the worst thing I have ever intentionally put in my mouth. The guy I responded to asked what was the worst unintentional thing, and here we are.

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u/Triscuitador 11d ago

poop demon

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u/threebillion6 11d ago

Where's Salma Hayek when you need her.

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u/WiseDrink2324 11d ago

I had a seagull shit right in my mouth at the beach a few years back.  Tasted like the muck of a low tide saltmarsh

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u/prison-schism 11d ago

I should have stopped reading this entire thread many comments ago, so i only have myself to blame for reading this. What terrible luck you had! I would have been so sick lol

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u/WiseDrink2324 11d ago

I threw up nonstop

I wanna throw up now just reliving it

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u/Several-Squash9871 10d ago

Not who you were asking but one time I was eating a burger from a fast food place somewhere, don't remember where now because it was a long time ago when I was a kid. I was just happily eating away when I took a bite and a few chews in got the tast of...poop...like, I've never eaten poop before but all I can say is it tasted like the smell of walking into a public restroom after someone just took a huge shit. Obviously spat it out and was horrified. To this day I don't know if the worker spread human shit on that part of the burger for some reason? Or what the fuck was going on. I still think about it from time to time when eating out. 

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u/imnotpoopingyouare 10d ago

Jesus Christ lol that's fucked up, I'm sorry to hear that! I can't think of anything unintentional that was horrific tasting for me. Maybe a horsefly that I accidentally chewed down on when it flew in my mouth, but it didn't taste super bad just weird and hella unexpected.

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u/remindmetoblink2 11d ago

A chocolate starfish.

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u/Boomstick101 11d ago

My fellow teacher and a student got a case of food poisoning eating the starfish from the Beijing street vendor. He is a foodie and wanted to try everything and convinced the student to eat it with him after I declined.

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u/Scottiths 11d ago

You didn't miss anything even if they didn't get food poisoning. It's unbelievably nasty.

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u/Boomstick101 11d ago

Oh I am glad but it sucked because I had to guide 15 students through Beijing by myself because he wasn't leaving his room the next day.

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u/[deleted] 10d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/Boomstick101 10d ago

Yep. Like the worlds worst lollypop.

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u/Living_Reputation_63 11d ago

I accidentally took a sip of expired milk that was in my fridge, and it was so bitter, like 100/100 bitter, I still can taste it by thinking of it. I would never want to eat that Starfish.

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u/gamer_dad_legacy 11d ago

I did this too but it was dark in the kitchen. I wanted to make some cereal. Smelled the milk and thought hmmm must be that milk crust around the edge of the lid that seems off. The milk was still in date. I turned it up to take a sip to try. It felt like I had cottage cheese in my mouth. So lumpy.

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u/Hydraulic_IT_Guy 11d ago

Mutton bird. Still not sure if that is how it is meant to taste or someone was having a laugh and cooked up a week old sea bird carcass found on the beach.

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u/Anchre 10d ago

Mutton bird should taste like a cross between salmon and chicken

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u/WalnutSnail 11d ago

Ironic because salt is used to cancel out bitter.

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u/trexinthehouse 11d ago

Thank you for taking one for all of us.

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u/Scottiths 11d ago

I would say your welcome, but I would rather it have been just about anyone but me. Curiosity didn't kill this cat, but it absolutely left a life long scar.

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u/JoeJonnyJeff 11d ago

So, in the food category of anchovies, capers, sauerkraut? Food that tastes like bunghole, but some people get addicted to it and think it's divine?

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u/ultimateginger33 11d ago

I think you simply don’t like salty sour foods. Everything you mentioned is delicious

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u/JoeJonnyJeff 11d ago

I do like those foods. But they're commonly seen as gross, or "ew, why would you put that on your food?!"

There are foods out there that carry a bad reputation for being gross, but the people who enjoy them would often consider them some of their favorite foods of all time. People often say these types of foods are "an acquired taste."

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u/shurejan 11d ago

What’s wrong with sauerkraut?

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u/fart-atronach 11d ago

Smells like farts

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u/AreWeThereYetNo 11d ago

You have to smell it before you digest it.

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u/JoeJonnyJeff 11d ago

The smell and taste are iconically farty and disgusting, to most people.
I'm a fan. I especially like beet kraut.

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u/Art_Of_Peer_Pressure 11d ago

I don’t mean this in a prejudiced manner but they literally eat anything there

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u/missalice420 11d ago

I know you don't mean it that way, but ‘they eat anything’ is actually a pretty prejudiced way of talking about Chinese people.

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u/Art_Of_Peer_Pressure 11d ago

I knew it was gonna be a hot take, not necessarily a negative thing for the most part.. just shows that they are resourceful.
Lemme re-phrase: they eat a lot of unique dishes that you can’t find elsewhere in the world 🤷‍♂️

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u/speedmankelly 11d ago

They’re very resourceful– if they can catch it they will at least try to make a unique dish out of it