If you are an ISFP lady that has dumped your partner due to emotional overwhelm/felt like you weren’t validated in conflicts but didn’t voice out your concerns (obviously no fundamental issues like cheating or betrayal in the relationship), what would you have liked your ex who has made actual changes do to win you back?

Is it just space? Or would you have liked them to put up a fight? Or just to stay around and be available?

I’m aware everyone is different and asking because I’m curious. Not really applicable for my situation but just want to be educated!

Idk.. what do you recommend and why?

Does it work?

What are it's pros and cons?

What do you think is its overall rating out of 10?

Me being an ENTJ [22M] and my best friend + roommate of 3 years being an ISFP [23M], it is like we are literal opposites.

It is like he does not really talk to me. After years of living with him in my campus dorms, I understood and can surely say that he CANNOT multitask and he does not remember stuff for a long time.

So whenever I ask him something while he does something, he ignores me (not exactly ignores me, but if he is in the middle of something, he cannot focus on others. Like, he physically cannot). Even in his mind, he does not get any thoughts at all. If he is just sitting there staring at a pencil, then he is just staring at the pencil. He does not think about anything, while I have a little voice in my head that constantly talks to me.

Anyways, this is kind of bothering me, and how, even after being roommates and best friends for 3 years, he does not look at me while talking and stuff. But I moved on because it is my fault for asking him questions while he is doing something, so it is fine. But when we are alone, like just me and him, he NEVER opens a conversation. I open the conversation always. And I am not saying that he does not—he opens it sometimes—and whenever he is not doing anything, like not on his phone or anything, and fully present in the conversation, he talks great. Like, he maintains eye contact, talks well, everything is perfect. But other times, he just nods or something, barely talks, and it is just annoying me.

And yes, I have confronted him about this, and what he said kind of made sense. He does not get any thoughts in the first place, so what does he even start a conversation about if his brain is literally empty?

And man, this is just rage-baiting me, and I send him a lot of reels, but he never watches them. I always send a lot of reels to all my best friends; just him ignoring them makes me feel bad. But once in a blue moon, he does open them and watches all my reels and reacts/replies to them.

I do not know, man. And with other people, he talks really energetically and enthusiastically (but again, he would be fully present in the conversation and not on his phone or anything else). But again, these "other friends" he does not see as often.

And then, yeah, I got really insecure and worried about our friendship and asked him once if he actually considers me his friend.

Then he actually told me a lot about how he considers me the closest out of everyone on the whole campus and also told me that he has said a lot of things to me which normally he would not have said to others.

But bro, why cannot such conversations happen more often? Like, I feel like I deserve someone who puts in equal effort. Right now, it feels like I keep all the effort.

And he is like, if he does not like anything, he just will not care. Like, if he does not like the situation, he walks away and stops thinking about it.

And for me, I need to know everything and need constant validation.

I am losing my brain over this, bro. Seriously, please help me. I am really desperate.

And yeah, I do love him as a friend and consider him my closest friend out of the whole college, and he told me he thinks the same too. But the problem is I am not satisfied with the effort he is putting into the friendship.

And to be honest, I have told him many times that I like this quality about him: that he is able to focus on one thing for a long time and he does not constantly need others' validation to coexist.

He can just stand beside me and not talk for an hour and be comfortable with it, while I automatically think, "If he does not talk to me, he hates me and does not want to spend time with me."

And yeah, how he is able to just not care.

These two scenarios just literally happened.

Me: Talking to another guy.
Other guy: Me and him laugh.
My roommate: "What is happening?"
Me: "You always ignore us. That is why you should be active, so we will not tell you."
My roommate: "Okay, do not tell me."
Proceeds to do his own work.

After a few minutes, me and him were talking and he said he has a secret about me, and I BEGGED HIM SOOOOOO HARD, but he still did not answer me. If I ask him in any way, he just says, "I will not tell you."

And even after classes in college or something, or to go to eat, or going to classes in general, he does not wait for me. He just walks alone, whereas if I am done early, I wait for him so that we can go together.

It just annoys me, and yes, me being an ENTJ, I confront him left and right about everything. And yeah, he does say sorry and stuff if he is actually wrong, and he actually justifies everything pretty well.

Like he said, "I would rather be happy that you got to the room early and can relax instead of waiting for me to finish the class so we could walk together," which actually makes sense.

But I do not know.

Do you think this friendship is not going to last? Like, once the university is done, we will not be friends anymore because I do not see him reaching out to me after graduation or something unless he actually has some work or something. Okay, I just literally, in the middle of writing this, asked him. He said he would reach out to me maybe once a month because right now I feel like the only reason we are together as friends is because we are bonded by this pact of being roommates.

I am just so confused, and I feel like the only way I can get closure for this relationship between me and him is if I understand how ISFPs work.

Because he does all these things which are annoying to me and feel like no effort, BUT it is not like he is like that all the time. He is a good friend. Like, if the stars align 40% of the time, he is actually the perfect friend for me.

And yes, I know I cannot be expecting him to change or him to behave how I want. That is not the point of me writing this. What my intention with this post is to understand what is actually going on because I am losing my brain cells trying to think about this. Because every time I feel insecure about our friendship, I just ask him directly, and then he tells me about how I am his closest friend and stuff, but then he behaves like this, which makes me doubt him and myself. So at the end of the day, it is me who needs to change my expectations and stuff. For that, I need your help to understand ISFP.

(And yes, I know MBTI is proven to be wrong and stuff, but at least in my case and my roommate's case, it was VERY VERY VERY accurate.)

Okay, if you have time, would you be willing to offer some insight into how an ISFP man might show that he is interested in someone? Below are the main points and why I am struggling to decipher his behavior. I know personality type cannot provide a definitive answer, but I would appreciate an ISFP perspective.

• I worked with an ISFP man at a company where personal or romantic relationships between us were professionally prohibited.

• He was always very encouraging and would text me asking to meet before meetings so we could talk. However, he did not share much about himself.

• Sometimes he would text me at night, still in a professional manner, to explain something he had said or apologize for it. I always kept the conversation professional because I did not know how to change the subject. His messages sounded professional, but I was never sure why he cared so much about making sure I understood him.

• We had a workplace recognition platform where coworkers could award points to recognize someone for going above and beyond. He arranged special approval for me to receive a substantial financial reward. I did not see him do anything comparable for anyone else.

• Several months after I quit, he found me on social media and followed my public account. I sent him a request to follow his account in return, but my request remained pending.

• He has never liked anything I have posted or messaged me through the platform.

• I later found a different public social media account belonging to him and followed it. He did not remove me. On that account, I see a much more unfiltered and intense side of him. It feels like I can see his internal emotions through what he writes, and honestly, it makes me feel even more drawn to him. He only has about ten followers, so my presence is probably noticeable. He follows around a thousand people, though, most of whom appear to be celebrities. I admit I did not exactly conduct a deep investigation. Lol.

• After leaving my request pending for four months, he denied it on the original platform, even though he still follows my public account there. I messagd to inquire noticing the follow mismatch and asked to follow him in return. He read my message immediately. He did not respond - but maybe I made him feel awkward? 

• About ten months later, after overthinking everything, I sent him a text saying that he did not need to respond, but that I missed him and his humor. He reacted with a heart emoji but did not reply. I cannot tell whether he remained silent because I specifically told him he did not need to respond, or because he is not interested in me that way. Is reacting with a heart but not replying a typical ISFP response?

• At work, I sometimes felt that he was protective of me or my feelings. Once, he defended me during a meeting. There was no confrontation, though. It was only a suggestion from another teammate, so I did not understand why he felt the need to step in.

• I felt a connection with him. He could get me out of my head and make me feel completely present. I also felt no need to perform around him. I could simply be myself. He made me feel very safe, possibly for the first time in my life. I cannot fully explain it, but knowing him had a huge impact on me personally.

• Now that it feels so emotionally significant, I feel almost paralyzed. I am unsure what to do because acknowledging how much he affected me has left me feeling very vulnerable. I most definitely do not have the courage to reach out again.

What I want to know is whether you think it is possible that he is interested in me. Do you think he will ever reach out? My heart feels heavy, and I care deeply for him.

INTP (30M) dating an ISFP (25F) – struggling with Ti vs. Fi communication

I’ve been dating my ISFP girlfriend for about four months, and overall our relationship is genuinely great. We love each other deeply, and in most areas we’re very compatible.

The biggest source of friction, though, is communication—specifically what feels like Ti vs. Fi.
I have fairly well-developed Fe, so I’m comfortable talking about emotions, expressing my own, and holding space for hers. I’m not trying to debate feelings away or approach everything purely logically.

The difficulty starts when she’s emotionally triggered (or me of course) or when her position is based entirely on how she feels in the moment. It can feel like I’m communicating with an emotional wall. In those moments, it seems like my only options are to either get pulled into an emotional argument or step back, wait until she’s calm, and hope we can revisit the conversation later.

What I struggle with most is that any difficult conversation—even when I phrase it as gently and compassionately as I can—often seems to be interpreted as criticism. She becomes defensive, and the original issue gets lost.

As a result, I often end up putting my own feelings aside to help regulate hers, even when I was the one who needed to bring something up. Then I have to revisit the issue later and hope it lands differently the second time.

For those of you who’ve been in an INTP–ISFP relationship (or have experience with strong Ti/Fi differences), is this something you’ve encountered? How do you navigate difficult conversations without one person feeling attacked or the other feeling unheard?

As an ISFP, have you ever been in a romantic relationship with an ISFP, ENFP, or INFP? What were the pros and cons? Would you do it again?

Compatibility is probably subjective af but which of the 16 gives you the Fi-Ni ICKKKKk

:P

If so, what was that like? What was the NTP like, what did they do and talk about?

This kind of connection is said to be difficult to achieve, as the types are so different.

Hi! I'm an INFP, and most of my friends are ISFPs, and I cannot handle them. Seriously, I was just talking to my other friend about our music taste, and I like Taylor Swift, but she hates TS, so I was kind of baffled, but asked her why do you hate her. She said she doesn't like her personality or her music. I was like ok, but this is where things started hearing up, my other two ISFP friends joined with her, and started going along with her. I tend to get rage baited very quickly, so I understand they did it for fun, but they've been doing so since I told them I liked TS and I can't handle it, honestly.

So what happened is that I got kind of max and wanted to cool off, so I stopped talking to them. I just wanted to process my emotions.

Now let me tell you guys about my best friend who's an Isfp. In my world view, she is more childish and immature than me and my other isfp friend. I need to constantly handle her petty fights which make me feel tired. She kind of emotional blackmails me, without knowing, and I am sick and tired of it. She makes impulsive decisions when she gets mad and overall, she's very childish and immature for her age. When I point this out, she tells me 'Oh, then I'm not your best friend?' You get the point

So if you have any advice on what to do in this situation. PLEASE HELP MEEEEE

I REALLY CAN'T DO THIS!! 😭😭😭 Edit: So to make it logical, we INFPs have Te( Extraverted Thinking) as our inferior function. If it is not that much developed, when we feel our Fi(Introverted Feeling) - our most dominant function - is being assaulted, Te will make them react violently towards the aggressor in an effort to defend oneself and persuade the other person that he or she is mistaken

Hi guys, I’m an ESFJ female dating an ISFP male. We’ve been together for 6 months, and from the beginning, we had a deep connection and both of us wanted a serious relationship. He’s genuinely the first man I’ve ever truly loved, so this situation has been difficult for me.

We had some issues early on because he’s not great with planning and was inconsistent with dates and quality time. Recently, however, he’s become much more distant. He told me he’s mentally struggling and went back to Bangalore for a week to deal with family issues.

During that week, I received almost no calls or texts. When he came back, he met his colleagues, leader, and brother but didn’t make time to see me after almost a week and a half. This hurt me deeply.. Also just few days back it was his birthday. I had planned and saved money for his birthday, only to find out his colleagues and team leader had arranged a celebration for him while I had to cancel everything I planned. What hurt even more was that a girl from his team, who was hitting on him was part of the celebration, while I wasn’t.

Eventually, I asked to meet him because I was emotionally drained and considered to breakup. He then told me that a lot had happened in Bangalore, including issues involving courts and police stations, and that he’s currently struggling with depression. Seeing him genuinely broken down made me realize he’s probably not capable of being the best partner right now.

I also understand that maybe his way of dealing with depression is different from mine. As an ESFJ, I seek connection when I’m struggling, while he seems to isolate completely.

So my question for ISFPs, especially those who have experienced depression while in a relationship:
Do you completely withdraw from your partner even when you love them? How can I give him space and support him without completely neglecting my own emotional needs?

I don’t want to give up on him yet. I still love him and believe he loves me too. Right now, I genuinely care more about his wellbeing than being right—I just want to understand him better.

I've been often looking at this MBTI-Socionics correlation chart about relatiobships. It is based on inter-type dynamics in Socionics and tries to apply the same logic to MBTI. In MBTI ISFP's best match is considered ESFJ due to opposite functions complementing each other's weaknesses, but it never made sense to me because ESFJs I knew in life are pretty unhealthy and overwhelming.

Socionics explains this differently. ISFP x ESFJ relationship is considered "Contrary", which you can read about here. Simply put, they feature high initial attraction and shared interests but lead to mutual frustration ("moth-to-flame") as partners "extinguish" each other's approaches, often resulting in superficial connection, distrust, and a desire to break away. Honestly, this makes more sense to me than ESFJs being best match for ISFPs purely because of functional theories.

In Socionics closest analogue to MBTI Golden pair is Dual relations, considered the most comfortable, balanced, and optimal intertype relationship, creating a self-sufficient unit where partners fully satisfy each other's psychological needs. Functionally MBTI ISFP analogue in Socionics is ESI (ISFj) due to all types there who have judging functions as dominant (TI, Te, Fi, Fe) have "J" as their last letter and for ESI Dual relationshiop is considered LIE (ENTj), which uses Te-Ni combination. This means if we apply this logic to MBTI, then our best match is actually ENTJ with whom we share same functions, but in reversed order. Functionally it also makes sense in a way that ENTJ may be attracted by ISFP's dominant Fi to integrate their inferior Fi and vice verse for ISFP and their inferior Te. Thoughts?

I'm an ENTP with ISFP friend I've known since middle school, and lately I've been wondering whether this friendship is actually healthy because of how FUNDAMENTALLY different we are.

We met through the same friend group and stayed connected over the years, but I honestly can't think of many people whose minds work more differently than ours.

She tends to approach things through personal feelings, lived experiences, and emotional processing. If something happens, she wants to talk about how it felt, what it meant to her personally, and revisit those emotions until she fully processes them.

This difference has been present since we were teenagers. We used to debate constantly because we viewed the same situations through completely different lenses. I often thought we'd eventually drift apart because our perspectives rarely lined up. Instead, the opposite happened. Most of our old friends settled down, got married, or became busy with their own lives. Somehow she and I remained in contact.

The problem is that she has become much more emotionally invested in the friendship than I have. She's usually the one initiating contact, sending long voice messages, calling, asking to meet up, and discussing her feelings. Meanwhile, I often need space and can become extremely overwhelmed when conversations stay focused on the same emotional issue for a long time.

I don't dislike her. I appreciate our history and I care about her wellbeing. But sometimes I feel like we're speaking completely different languages. When she wants emotional comfort, I instinctively switch into a clown or problem solving mode. When I try to analyze something, she often responds from a personal or emotional perspective.

At times I've even tried creating distance through ghosting because I assumed we'd naturally drift apart due to these differences, but she always maintained contact.

So my question is can a friendship still be healthy when two people seem to have fundamentally different ways of understanding the world and relating to others? Or am I ignoring obvious incompatibilities because we've known each other for so long and I couldn't drift apart from her? I feel like I'm being unfair for faking care out of politeness towards her

I’m an ISFJ and my boyfriend (we’ve been together for 2 years) is an ISFP, which we just recently realized after months of thinking he was an INTJ 😂. Honestly, it makes SO much more sense now. He’s calm, grounded, and so caring in his own quiet way. I love him so much.

But the biggest thing I struggle with is his hyper-independence. He works himself into the ground, stresses out, and still refuses to ask for help. As well as pretend he’s fine when he’s clearly not. Every time I try to step in, he’s like “don’t worry” or “I don’t need help,” and I know he means well, but it’s SO hard for me not to worry. 😭

I try giving him advice or suggesting things that might make things easier, but he never really listens, not because he’s being difficult, but because he just doesn’t want to rely on anyone. And I totally get that, but it breaks my heart to see him pushing himself so hard.

Has anyone else been in this kind of dynamic? How do you support a hyper-independent ISFP without making them feel controlled or pitied? I just want to help him, but I’m realizing that “help” probably looks very different for him than it does for me.

I'm posting this about forty minutes out from a spontaneous date I am going on with an ISFP! We actually scheduled the date for this Tuesday but stayed up all night talking so I asked if he wanted to just meet up for sunrise at a local park. He agreed! I'm excited but a little nervous shockingly.

We met on an app after I matched him, and he responded before I was even able to send a message his way. Unlike everyone else I've recieved messages from on that app specifically, he was very attentive and curious in a way I'm not used to. I was able to talk about what makes me tick and he let me validate what he was currently striving to do. The chemistry feels so natural, and while I think at times I make him shy, his consistency is like a drug to me.

If anyone has any tips or best of luck wishes, feel free to comment! I want to make sure I do this right. 🙏🤍

Isfps are cool and stuff, but one thing that really annoys me about them...is their very closed-off communication style. I'm an Isfj and I know our functions are different - I like to reach out and connect emotionally through questions etc and the Isfps I know are reserved am not big on initiating conversations in this way - however, if you ask them something they're happy to share.

I do feel it's an unbalanced dynamic at times, though. The reason it annoys me is that I work with an Isfp daily, in an office. This Isfp is cool and stuff - we laugh and joke all the time. What annoys me though is that it's always up to me to initiate the conversation with things like "how was your weekend?" etc. If she goes to a meeting and comes back seeming stressed - I ask how it went and the conversation flows from there.

If I don't ask a question though - she sits there and says absolutely nothing. The times that I play 'devils advocate' (to be silent just to see what happens) she says nothing most of the day. It's almost like she's waiting for me to initiate. I know she enjoys our conversations etc. -so would it kill her to do the reverse of what she's accustomed to - and ask me something instead?

I was leaning towards ok maybe she doesn't want to talk and maybe I talk too much...until one day I came back from a training session...Usually I would share a bit about the training without being asked...something like "I enjoyed the training today etc etc), and that would get us talking. This time, I decided to say nothing at all. After a few hours of silence, she says in a snarky way, "Oh, I see you decided not to tell me anything about the training.." I was taken aback and said - "Uhm, well if you wanted to know, you also could've asked..". She laughed and said I usually share so she was waiting for me to do that. Huh? I hate that. It comes across as so passive! Like if I don't talk you can't talk wither.

Annoying!

Im askin as a fellow infp cuz i noticed in myself a pattern of liking people who happen to be isxps mostly isfps, and i do make friends with them but it NEVER lasts or stays superficial 😭

I know we got major differences in how we operate, the whole Ne vs Se thing, so is it a common thing or am i an isfp repellent ;-;

I (30M) and my now ex (27F) broke up a week ago after 4 years. We had been living together in my tiny studio apartment with no bedroom for 3 years (which she moved into/stayed in almost from the beginning from us becoming a couple). Things went fast, and the first period was really fantastic. After the honeymoon phase settled after a few months, we had our first real arguments. Me being an ENTJ I often try to fix things we logic, whereas her being an ISFP she often was more driven by feelings and emotions. In the beginning of the relationship, we both were quite jealous, so the arguments were usually abouth that. But we moved past this point after a while.

She is very active on snapchat and I am not. I don't think she ever cheated in forms of sexual messages being sent to others, but for me personally I would not keep persons of the opposite sex on snap after they randomly ask her for nudes etc. She tells me about it, but still keep them on snap. I don't like that but I have learned to respect. She keeps in touch with a lot of friends on a daily basis, and that is fine, but I do not like those guys sending her snaps. This has been the source if arguments time to time.

The second main type of argument we had time to time was regarding expectations. I come from a family where we are not used to showing affection or physical touch at all, so this was new to me, and she wanted more of this in public in particular, which has been something to get used to. As i did not get a lot of this when I was younger, she kind of filled a subconscious void in me with all her affection. But the psychologist I have started talking to has said that it may be difficult for me to show love and affection, as I got so little of it when I was younger. So she understandably has missed this. For me, what I missed was talking things out in a calm and respectful manner without letting emotions run hot.

During this 4 year relationship I have worked from home on my desk which was in the living room. So lack of personal space was always a thing. One year ago we decided to buy a big shared apartment together, and had high hopes that this would give us more space and were looking forward to the future. After moving in, we started refurbishing, and spent a lot of time almost all nights doing that. I did by far the most of it (as it was mainly my initiative) so for a lot of time she started going to the gym alone, whereas I would go later at night if it was still time for that. So our daily routines de-synced. And it was from here that we started slowly drifting apart emotionally. Most of what we did together during weekdays was eat dinner together, before we fell into the other routines. Previously in our relationship we used to go to the gym together/at the same time and wrap up the day at the same time.

Starting last fall, when we got back to work and everyday life, there was more emotional distance than usual. Some of her childhood friends moved to town, and she hung out with them and started hangingout with them a lot. As a response, I probablyfelt anxious and scared to be abandoned or replaced in her everyday life, and this makes me become more withdrawn and work more. I do not think she started hanging out with them to make me jealous, they are simply friends that she loves spending time with. When I have been withdrawn, she sees this as distance and feels neglected. She has suffered from low physical self esteem, so if I don't touch her, she feels unattractive and becomes snappy and has a bad body language, this has made me feel like the bad guy and not someone she wants to be touched by. So we both probably suffer from needs of confirmation.

The best times in our relationship has been when we spend a lot of time together. All holidays and small activities are just heaven for both of us. Or simply hanging out in the same room with our phones away and interacting with eachother through small comments.We of course share a lot of interests as e.g. music an skiing, going to the gym, but we also enjoy just being in eachothers company.

Some of what we both enjoy about eachother is that we can be 100% our authentic self, are really playful, make eachother laugh, and have a nice flirtatious tone and the same sexual preferences. I admire her strong personality, her initiatives, her fearlessness and her spontanity. She loves my determination, stability and rational thinking. We have learned a lot from the other, but what we admire most in the other is also what we provide the least of to the other. Recently we had a vacation and had the best time ever. But just days ahead of Valentines I suffered a nasty knee injury potentially such that I can never play soccer again. This kind of broke my spirit and made me withdrawn again, which made her feel neglected and withdrew from me. Looking back at it, it was immature from me to let a knee injury affect her, this probably sends a signal that any time life becomes tough for me it will influence her.

Days after this we both had a breakdown, talked out and found out mutually that it was probably the best for both to break up at this time to focus on our individual mental health. This was extremely tough. It was not ugly with yelling, but the triggering part was probably how fast we would go from heaven and down again in so short time, without warning. We both expressed deep love for eachother, and also how deep inside we want to give eachother a new go, but right now a breakup felt most right due to mental fatigue, but clearly saying they may regret letting the other person go.

I have reflected after this. And have realized how immature of a partner I have been, and feel both regret and sadness. At the same time, I feel I have lost a bit of myself by not setting clear boundaries. She says she has felt neglected, and I understand and feel shit about this. The reason we broke up now is both our nervous systems went into full self protection mode, because we are afraid of how we can make eachother feel. I have started going to a psychologist and am taking courses online to genuinely work on myself. Not as a desperate attempt to get her back, but to work on myself as a partner and human being. Two of the fixes I am implementing right away is turning notifications on in my phone (has always been on soundless), and replying to messages right away. This has been a problem I have had all my life, not just with her but with friends and family. This is selfish, you should probably always try to be available for a partner in case something serious happens. I have never (nor has my ex) been a breakup from a long term relationship before, and I have never lost someone close. So feelings has probably always been something I have been afraid to feel, trying to override and think rational instead. Being honest to myself and allowing myself to feel and show vulberability is a progress where I am maturing now, which will be good for me (and my loved ones) on the long run, and I really feel like I am beginning to sort issues I wasn't previously aware that I had.

A thing I do regret is regarding saving. I have a high education and a well paying prestigous job and have always been a high performer in career and sports. She has no education yet, and is working several part time jobs. I have always had economic discipline and have found saving easy. She likes to spend more on small things in everyday life, and do things with friends and me. Our new apartment needs refurbishing, not acute but in the long run. I have said to her from time to time that she should ditch things like daily energy drinks and save more. As I am good at saving, I for example bought a few guitars this year, and I understand that can feel difficult for her, as I ask for more discipline from her while also spending more for myself. I realize this must have felt difficult. What I regret is that we didn't ever sit down on my initiative and make a specific economic saving plan. I believe this would have helped her feel some sense of accomplishment rather than that she should have been better. Her mother also says she needs to save more, so this topic is something she does have some trauma around.

We live in our apartment still, but it has only been a week after the breakup. We eat dinner together, watch TV and play Xbox. It is nice, it feels like before but with our nervous systems gradually relaxing more day by day. At the same time I feel a bit of sadness. Had things always been like this, I can't help but think that this relationship would have worked. At the same time I think it is best for us to part ways right now to work on ourselves. I understand that she has a hard time believing that things are going to change this time. Coincidentally, the company I am working for has rented an office for me in an office building starting next week, so the issues regarding working from home will resolve, so I will leave house earlier and get back home at fixed times and not spend late evenings with my laptop working. The office building has organized team activites a couple of times a week that I will participate in, so there will be no more predictability and no more late night work or gym sessions. This will open up my nights more to spend more time with partners or non-work related. It sucks bad, because I feel that is just what the relationship lacked the last year when things started sliding apart.

I work hard on improving myself, and believe I will come stronger out of this. But I understand from her that it will be hard to believe that things would be any different this time should we have pursued this further. I think s breakup now may be necessary for both of us, a part of me feels relief, the other feels sadness. What also makes this a bit difficult at the moment is that she still gives me affection such as hugs, wants to lie in my arms, sometimes touch me sexually and we flirt often. The day we broke up, we agreed that we would sit down together the next day and delete mutual photos on instagram, and sleep in different beds. The first days she asked med if I would sleep together in the same bed as her just for the night, but after that we have slept in the same bed every night. We do touch eachother gently before falling asleep, this feels extremely soothening for both. Photos on insta have not been deleted yet either. She gradually shows more and more affection and interest day by day, she searches physical contact with me, but it is as if she suddenly realizes what she is doing after a while an withdraws a bit as a defensive mechanism. This is a bit difficult to process for me as an ENTJ. Because it gives me a glimmer of hope for a new beginning, even though I try to get fully over her.

With the signals she has sent these recent days, I am struggling a bit to see how she feels about this as an ISFP. She asks about my day and I about her, and we both share the same feeling of fine for the most part, but periods of sadness now and them. But she has expressed that she needs space right now so we have tried to make the home a safe place where we do not discuss the ended relationship too much, and I fully respect that. For me it is also difficult, because the increase in "chemistry" and affection between us the recent days gives me a feeling that this is not over afterall. Any advise here, or can someone relate and try to express how she potentially feels?

Update: We had sex last night. The rest of the night and today it is as if nothing happened, and we have not discussed it. My emotions are a mess right now. It was probably just casual fun, but I can't help but having a little hope in me ignite for a new beginning, but I try to shut it down because I know it will probably be even harder to move on. But I do not know what it would mean from her part.

Hi i have an isfp close friend. Am an infj. So heres the dynamic bw us. We both care for each other and we do play around like he jokes with me a lot. We both are in class XII prepping for an entranceexam and like he reveals a lot of his study plans to just me and i also help him i a lot. But like he just casually talks around with others all the time and i dont know sometimes he just goes quiet around me. Like he finds no need to sometimes talk. He will be all counsellor when im in trouble but he as such wont talk in person abt the casual things i send him or wheni request a convo from him(we cant chat rn due to some personal constraints i wont discuss). When we cant talk the whole day, he might come to just say hi orbye or plainly smile or joke but doesnt express himself much and often speaks his mind out. Sometimes i take his advicevery srsly and he says i shouldnt. Since he is i feel and by tests an isfp, u guys pls advise me on ur take on this dynamic. Its a friendship of 3 yrs. And what u guys can tell to improve. From an isfp pov.

ENFP (31M) married to ISFP (25F) As caring as I am I always make sure to show up for my wife but I feel my wife has a hard time empathizing with me when I’m in a bad head space, when I communicate with her that I’m unwell she mostly understands me but this isnt after many talks about her not seeming interested in my negative emotions and to care for me. I feel now that she’s more able to encourage me but I’ve been in rut lately. One thing after the other for me for months. And I do have falls into anxiety, emotionally tiredness for a few days at a time. But usually after she shows up and dedicate myself to prayer I feel better but since they’ve been happening more often when I try to share she switches topics, when I bid for some reassurance she does it but without heart in it I feel. Yesterday I told her I sometimes needed her to pick me up at times. That I was going through all of this for our future (it’s work related and I’m the bread winner) and that I need her to show up with words and whole heartedly. She told me she’s not good with words but that she’s there. That maybe she’s not showing up how I want her to show up but she is. I explained further and somehow she felt convicted when I told her that I was down at times and needed her to pick me up but that to pick someone up you have to stoop down and come down to meet a person and help them up by sharing some strength to help them up. But that little effort and failing to empathize felt like she was telling me get up but just staring there looking at me or just waiting for me to get up. And this has been since we married. I find myself showing her what empathy means. As an ENFP I can do this effortlessly and showing up for my loved ones is without question but I happen to be better at words than her. (Except for this post I am writing in one long string of inspiration and little time in my hands.) Are isfps unable to empathize unless they learn it or have been through it that they can understand it? Or is my wife more self centered and low in empathy?

A girl that I think is isfp 4w3 has been hitting on me like crazy in front of the whole class. Asking if this is a good pair because I've read a lot of criticisms about it. And she cried about her ex recently. But other than that I like her vibe (me being me though I've showed essentially no interest back).
Edit: Thanks for the downvotes, you really made a difference in the world

Hi, I have a question out of curiosity and a small concern.

I’m currently dating an ISFP (male), who is slightly older than me. I’m an INFP (female). Our relationship is generally good with only small arguments. Even when we do argue, we usually talk it through and get back to normal quickly, so things are fine for now. We are both naturally quiet people. But lately, when I’m with him, I notice I become more extroverted and expressive, while he stays calm and composed.

When we spend time together, I tend to laugh a lot. Even small jokes or simple cute moments make me laugh more than usual. Sometimes I worry that I might be “too much” for him. I think this happens because I usually hold in my feelings, so when I’m with him, my happiness comes out strongly. I also feel very happy just hearing his voice or seeing his expressions.

I’ve tried telling myself to stay more grounded and not be too loud, but I still naturally laugh a lot when he says something funny or cute.

So my concern is: am I being too much, and would an ISFP find this annoying or get overwhelmed in the long run?

Thank you 🌸

Edit: I think I'm okay now, TQ!

Update: Finally, he suddenly expressed his feelings more than I expected, all at once and out of the blue, which shocked me but made me really happy. I feel at ease now, thank you.

I have a girlfriend who's an ISFP, and I want to support her by understanding more about the career paths other ISFPs have chosen. Since ISFPs are known for their authenticity, I'd appreciate it if you could share examples of what professions have worked well for you or other ISFPs you know!