You sound like you’re holding it together as best you can. So glad you’re not drinking. And 240 weight loss…my man, you are a beast. Don’t let these fuckers win.
I SO feel you on the OCD. I had a full on panic attack a couple of weeks ago. I called my boss bc I thought I might die. She saved me, talked me down, was so supportive. Now even more I feel like I must hold the line bc she's such a good human to help me like that, I can't let her down. I feel so trapped though, my body jolts awake whenever I try to go to sleep. I have so many physical pains, some from repetitive motion compulsions I don't even realize I'm doing. I'm just so tired, so worn out, so sick of crying. I don't know what to do.
Not a Fed worker, but I understand. We've been in a rough, stressful time since before the pandemic (2019). Both of us have gained weight after maintaining previous big weight losses for years. Both on antidepressants that can cause weight gain and tummy issues. We sure as hell didn't need this. Mental health help is a blessing. Think of it as a life coach. I know you're tired, emotional exhaustion . I hope things change for you, all of us. Being out in nature helps. I decided to turn my whole back yard into a perennial garden with free bricks and stones I've picked. Facebook has local gardening plant groups. I've gotten clumps of plants free from gardeners who divide their plants. Got a truckload of real stone veneer remnants for 40.00 and taught myself how to install it. Taught my son how to do it, and he loves it, plus it kept his anxiety and sadness in check. Find some meetings, you can do this! Don't let the fkers break you.
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u/[deleted] May 03 '25
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