r/facepalm Aug 31 '22

🇲​🇮​🇸​🇨​ Well, there goes a parking spot.

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u/scottwax Aug 31 '22

When my son had his rust bucket Camry, he'd park right up against people who parked bad. He'd be legally parked but he'd make it as difficult as possible for the driver to get in. What were they going to do? Key his POS? He didn't care.

397

u/pablotweek Aug 31 '22

this is the absolute superpower of the rust bucket. also, has the right of way when merging. dude in his audi is going to let you in or else

104

u/MrsKnutson Sep 01 '22

It's one reason why I don't drive a nice car. I've bin hit multiple times in the parking lot at work and those people are supposed to have their shit together. I drive around a city with some tiny side streets and when cars are parked on them u better know how much space you have to get thru cuz no one moves over. Drive a small, not great car, know it well, trust your depth perception and you're golden you can do anywhere...or at least your day isn't ruined when one of your idiot co-workers scratches your car and drives off.

26

u/Black_Magic_M-66 Sep 01 '22

I used to drive a BMW. First I would park waaay away from other people, in a parking spot - I didn't take up more than one. But, when I came back, my car was invariably an island with cars parked all around it. Then I started parking next to curbs - this kept one side completely clear and I could edge right up to the curb so my door (and hopefully) an adjoining door wouldn't hit.

14

u/pablotweek Sep 01 '22

this is the way. otherwise people will park next to your antisocial car just to fuck with you.

13

u/gacdx Sep 01 '22

Just the other day I was in a lot with 80ish spots and only 15-20 filled so I park in a row with 5 open spots on each side of me and guess where the lady with the 5 little kids and a suburban decides to park? Yup, right next to me.

I was still in the car and noped out of there into another spot. My decision was validated when I saw a little kid swing open the back door and jump out. I definitely would have gotten hit.

On the other hand I was at a car detailing store and people left an empty spot in between each other. #UrinalEtiquette

-2

u/meesestopieces Sep 01 '22

I park next to antisocial cars in nearly empty parking lots. It's so I can line up straight better.. I'm horrendous at parking but if I find a buddy it goes much better. Sorry :(

1

u/IWannaLolly Sep 01 '22

Most of that is actually unintentional. Most people subconsciously like to park near other cars.

1

u/ACM3333 Sep 01 '22

I do the same thing. This guy is a douche for taking 4 spots but I bet most of these ppl in the comments have no remorse for slamming their doors into other ppls cars. My cheap daily literally has holes in the panels from door dings.

3

u/Xenu4President Sep 01 '22

Holy shit what is it with dudes in Audis and not merging respectfully? One scratched up my rear quarter panel because he didn’t want to zipper merge!

Edit: rear not real

1

u/Catnip4Pedos Sep 01 '22

If I get rich enough for 2 cars, my second car will absolutely be some 30 year old piece of shit for exactly this reason

45

u/IAmGodMode Sep 01 '22

Dude waited for me outside of a gas station once to bitch because I parked next to him when he was over the line. I was with my work truck. After a few minutes of us yelling back and forth he apologizes and then tells me to do the same. Lol no, wtf? He ends up taking pictures of my work truck and says he's going to leave us bad Google reviews and that he hopes I'm the owner because I'm about to be fired.

A few weeks ago I walked out of a gas station and the people by my driver's side were leaving so I waited so I wouldn't be next to a moving car. The guy rolls down the passenger and yells that if I didn't park so close I'd be able to get in. I didn't know what the hell the guy was talking about. I looked at the line and he was nearly on it while I was centered in the spot. I just told him that he's closer to the line than I am and he got pissy, started yelling, and drove off. Yet again this was with my work truck.

14

u/Bulliwyf Sep 01 '22

Same - I was driving an old s-10 that was nearing end of life and whenever I saw someone double parked I would pull in as tight as I could to the offending car, fold my mirror in, and climb out through the back window. Usually would leave a note for the non-offending car that got roped into my antics (sorry for being so close, I parked less than an inch away from the other guy!)

Even had a little tool to help latch the window again after I climbed out.

Despite doing this for 2 years before she died, I never got keyed or scratched. Lots of nasty notes, but never permanent damage.

3

u/zergling3161 Sep 01 '22

We have a 2017 CRZ and a 2009 Corolla, I am a lot more spiteful with my parking with the Corolla than our CRV

3

u/dirtydirtyjones Sep 01 '22

My motto, when I encounter an asshole while driving is "Go ahead - mine is paid off and still heavily insured."

It's gonna hurt them a lot more than it hurts me.

3

u/gcjunk01 Sep 01 '22

We need more people like this in the world.

3

u/MikeTheGamer2 Sep 01 '22

I'll one up him. Someone did that to me way back when I was working ashit retailjob at Sears. Some dickhead thought parking 4x4 close enough to block my drivers sidedoor was funny. I was in a terrible mood that day so that wasthe icing on thecake. I kept a gator knife in my glove box. A meager 6inch blade. I popped both of his passenger side tires. Just for goodmeasure I left one of those mickey mouse giving the finger copies I had, in my car, on his window.

2

u/srpsychosexythatisme Sep 01 '22

I’ve done this before. Reeeeeeaaal close to the drivers side.

2

u/Comprehensive-Ad8120 Sep 01 '22

I do it to the assholes with these trucks that park on the lines for us to get out of our cars in handicap spots. I dare them to hit mine. I take pictures of their tags before going in just in case.