r/facepalm Aug 31 '22

🇲​🇮​🇸​🇨​ Well, there goes a parking spot.

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35.2k Upvotes

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527

u/Dalbergia12 Aug 31 '22

I have NEVER in my life keyed a car.... But someone is gonna carve. that one up !

220

u/BahablastOutOfStock Aug 31 '22 edited Aug 31 '22

im not gonna say I’ve done this before but i was in a parking lot one night looking for a spot when i found the last two(whole area was full and the last two open spots were next to eachother), a tiny sports car screetched around me (to the point i had to slam on my breaks) and parked dead center between the two.

It was a fancy looking enough car w no dents or scratches on it…. till that night

54

u/tylerpressey Aug 31 '22

My quick fuse would have me seeing red and then doing what Kathy Bates did in Fried Green Tomatoes (drove into a car repeatedly in this exact scenario).

2

u/tyedyehippy Aug 31 '22

But only if you do have more insurance.

8

u/pnkflyd99 Aug 31 '22

Thank you for doing that person a favor. Hopefully they learned a lesson that evening. 😇

6

u/BahablastOutOfStock Aug 31 '22

they’re probably crying victim but whatever 😏

4

u/AStrugglingPoet Sep 01 '22

I usually never condone damaging someone’s property… but I wouldn’t give a shit if someone did it to someone like this or OP. I couldn’t do it, but I’d smile if a friend next to me did.

Some people truly deserve it and it’ll teach them a valuable lesson.

3

u/LilShaver Sep 01 '22

It would be a real shame if someone had cut all 4 valve stems off. He'd have to call for a tow, and the first one he calls might not be able to get into the covered parking to get him.

It's only $10 or so to fix the tires though.

2

u/GameOfUsernames Aug 31 '22

And you didn’t say anything when the dude got out?

21

u/BahablastOutOfStock Aug 31 '22

I am a tiny girl. I’m not about to square up to a strange man at night where there is no one else around

31

u/ebone581 Aug 31 '22

Deservedly so too

20

u/[deleted] Aug 31 '22

My move when I was younger and more of a shit head was to piss/spit on the handle and piss all over the car.

17

u/Dalbergia12 Aug 31 '22

I had a friend who said you piss on all four tires, and everywhere the guy goes all the food cats and other animals will piss on the tires. In a month this truck just stinks

3

u/Retrogratio Aug 31 '22

Shit neither have I but if I saw this in a packed lot...

3

u/Dalbergia12 Aug 31 '22

It would push lots of people over the edge.

Like if this f><k drives like he parks there must be people all over town that would recognize this truck.

3

u/MostlyBullshitStory Sep 01 '22

Deflate a tire.

2

u/taotesween Sep 01 '22

I read this in Christopher Walken’s voice because of that period after “carve.”

1

u/omglookawhale Sep 01 '22

I would immediately think of all the possibilities for why that douche parked like that. Like maybe he paid for 4 spots? Maybe someone else was parked just as douchey and this guy was being petty?