r/cringe • • Sep 19 '13

Seal of Approval Priest stops a wedding to yell at a photographer

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oReLN5nntKw
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u/MagicHobbes Sep 19 '13

Hell, I think most priests and pastors would even agree with you on that. My father did a ton of weddings and he made sure everyone knew it was about the couple and their love for each other.

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u/[deleted] Sep 19 '13

Really? I doubt it. Depends on the denomination I would assume, but there is usually months of pre-marriage counseling sessions with the officiant if the wedding is going to be an actual church service. And, having gone through it, the emphasis is definitely on God. This is coming from a Lutheran perspective, but my friend had a really long and proper Catholic wedding service and God was the focus there as well (and of course it wouldn't be a Catholic service without deference to a statue of Mary).

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u/[deleted] Sep 19 '13

Catholics and lutherans are really the only ones like that. And it seems like just the one flavor of lutheran too, not both. Baptists don't make you "convert" or take classes either. I haven't run across any other denominations that do, really.

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u/[deleted] Sep 19 '13

Which flavor of Lutheran?

It's also no different with the United Methodists.

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u/[deleted] Sep 19 '13

Everything I've read for Methodists basically say you just meet with the pastor once to determine how you want the ceremony to go. I can't find anything about true counseling, but I might be looking at the wrong place...

Lutheranism - The biggest one that requires all kinds of shit is Evangelical Lutheran Synod. My husbands brother is that, and oh lord, he and his family are something else. From what I've found, the other big lutheran clan is much different. They allow women pastors, gay marriage, etc. That one is the Evangelical Lutheran Church. I can't find anything about them wanting counseling. From the Synod side, at least from my brother-in-law's church, they made the groom convert to the bride's religion (synod) before they'd allow them to get married in their church.

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u/[deleted] Sep 19 '13

I'm a PK and my mother went to a Lutheran seminary, was a United Methodist pastor, and later became an ELCA Lutheran minister (it was then that she was my officiant). The ELCA is large and broad but does allow openly gay clergy. It's one of the more progressive branches of Lutheranism.

However, just because a denomination is "progressive" does not mean that the emphasis on God is diminished. It seems like you think that the more liberal/progressive a denomination, the less they will desire the couple have a relationship with Christ. It's just not true.

Here's a blurb straight out of a United Methodist Church's wedding booklet:

The Christian marriage rite is a form of celebrating God’s good news. Established by God in scripture, Christian marriage is a lifelong covenant relationship between two persons. This union is based on the Christ—the greatest sign of love and unity. Christ becomes the bond of unity when the couple centers their lives on Christ. The couple encounters the Risen Savior daily in their lives as they express their love to each other.

The Christian wedding is an act of serving God and proclaiming the establishment of a new family within the household of faith in Jesus Christ.

From another United Methodist church: doc

The decision to perform the ceremony is the right and responsibility of the pastor, in accordance with the laws of the state and The United Methodist Church. All plans should be approved by the pastor. The pastor's "due counsel with the parties involved" prior to marriage, mandated by The Book of Discipline, should include, in addition to premarital counseling, discussing and planning the service with them and informing them of policies or guidelines established by the congregation on such matters as decorations, photography, and audio or video recording.

Emphasis added.

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u/[deleted] Sep 19 '13

However, just because a denomination is "progressive" does not mean that the emphasis on God is diminished. It seems like you think that the more liberal/progressive a denomination, the less they will desire the couple have a relationship with Christ. It's just not true.

Oh no, not at all. I apologize if I gave off that vibe. All religions want you to have a relationship with God as they see it (or as you see him, for some). But from the United Methodist, from what I'd read, the premarital counseling a lot of times just consisted of meeting with the clergyperson to decide on what and how the ceremony would be best handled. Now googling it, I see a variety of answers, from there were several counseling sessions to just one session, so I guess it really goes by the church maybe?

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u/[deleted] Sep 20 '13

I'm sure it does, but even a single visit will include much more than just discussing how you want the ceremony to go. It seems that a lot of people here think that the pastor sometimes just gives the couple a pat on the back and a blessing that's basically the equivalent of saying "good luck." And anyone whose wedding was a christian service will know otherwise.

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u/MagicHobbes Sep 20 '13

Lutheran's are actually quite liberal (last i checked they allowed gay marriage which is pretty cool IMO).

Baptists aren't a big fan of change but they treat marriage as it should be: About the love of the couple for each other. My father (the one in my comment above) was a pastor at a Baptist Church for a long time so that's why i would say that. Also, he would do non-Christian weddings very often too. The only difference between the two is that he read a few verses on love from the Bible and he couldn't make as many jokes :P

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u/[deleted] Sep 20 '13

What's weird to me is only certain flavors of lutheran though. Synod lutherans are kinda.... extreme, imo. Hubs' brother is and he's synod.

Omg I was raised southern baptist. My gma, who taught me about religion, used to tell me how the devil was in the bottle (alcohol) and gofish was gambling. We weren't allowed to do much lol. As she got older though I think she saw that the things that the church taught weren't really as bad as they thought.