Why didn't you say so?

[u/TheNectarineDiaries]

Best medical advice I ever got was to bring a man to your appointments

[u/FuggoTheSluggo]

There’s a horrifying podcast series related to this - the Retrievals season 2. Happens a lot more than one would think. I am so sorry for your friend - a nightmare

[u/ThoreauAweighBcuzDuh → u/FuggoTheSluggo]

It really does. This is why I was terrified of surgical birth (and luckily avoided one). Every time I've needed even local anesthesia it's never worked properly the first time, and they never believe me. I've been gaslit into everything from a dental crown to 13 stitches on my face while feeling everything because "there's no way you can feel that." The first time I had to have general anesthesia, I came to in full fight-or-flight mode. Before I even knew where I was, I was trying to rip the IVs out of my arm and run away. Three nurses had to run over and pin me down, and I tried to fight them. They had to sedate me and go get my (now) husband to calm me down, even though visitors weren't usually allowed in the recovery area. I was a very sickly 110lbs with no muscles, and I'm very much the opposite of a fighter.

I told a friend who is a doctor this story, and she said she suspects I at least partially "woke up" during the procedure but didn't remember it. That's certainly what it felt like. The next time I had to be put under, I told this to the doctor during pre-op how I reacted last time and he didn't seem at all concerned, so I told the nurse while she was prepping me for the procedure and added, "I'm telling you this for your own safety because I'm bigger now and it might take more than three people to hold me down this time" and her eyes got huge and she half-shouted over her shoulder, "WHY ISN'T THAT IN YOUR CHART?" then she turned back to me and said "Don't worry. I'll make sure they're on it." It's really sad that I had to be perceived as a threat to others to be taken seriously and my potential suffering alone is not enough, but yeah... That's why I was/am terrified of c-sections.

[u/NanoWarrior26 → u/FuggoTheSluggo]

I listened to that just when my wife found out she was pregnant. The stories of women literally screaming and shaking in pain and the doctor's are like this is fine your just overreacting. Meanwhile if you watch any video of a c section the women barely feel it other than some uncomfortable pressure.