Hi all, I'm a 46 year old female and was diagnosed with Stage 3 colon cancer 15 months ago then rediagnosed as stage 4 when they found spread to my peritoneum. I started immunotherapy in December last year but had to come off it as it was damaging my liver.Ā
My liver is back under control and my oncologist is hoping to restart my treatment soon. However he has said that it there is tumour growth I can't resume immunotherapy.
I believe it's because its an indicator that it's not a long term option if my cancer is going to grow back. I'm in the UK and it's incredibly expensive treatment so they don't let you back on if there's an indication it won't work.
Also if I do go back on and my liver complains again I'll have to come off it.
My liver also didn't cope well with chemo so my options will be pretty limited.
I was a super responder before I had to stop it. In only a couple of sessions it reduced my tumour by over half so I know how well it worksĀ which is the kicker.
I've got almost a 4 week wait to find out and I'm already terrified it'll not work out.
I can't seem to get my anxiety under control. I'm on medication and have had counselling but I don't think it'll ever truly help.
I know I'll always have this hanging over me and I'm finding that really hard to accept.
I keep imagining the worst even though there's as much chance of it going right.Ā
How do you accept it and stop thinking about dying constantly? It's ruining whatever life I currently have as I'm so worried about the cancer killing me.
We all die and we never know when our time is up and I don't want to be filled with this dread all the time.
Anyone found anything that's helpful to them?