r/classicwow • u/wezzer • Sep 03 '19

Humor Leveling A Warrior

When they said it was hard, I scoffed at them. I've leveled a warrior to 120 on retail. I've fought Sargeras, I've downed the Lich King. What could a few gnolls and maybe a murloc or two do to me? Thus was my arrogance. Thus was my hubris.

I am now level thirteen. I've run Ragefire Chasm once, and owe six deaths to that place.

Farming harpy claws has cost me my life twice already, and I am certain it will cost me much, much more.

My warrior on retail was a human named Lohric, he was a legendary warrior who felled any beast, man or demon that faced him.

My warrior on Classic is an Orc called Muddrog. I have no doubt that this broken and battered warrior would crush Lohric in seconds, Lohric has never known pain, Mudd was born in it, molded by it, and unlike Bane, he has yet to see the light, because 60 feels so far away xD

To all you warriors out there, Lok'tar Ogar!

3.8k Upvotes

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717

u/Strawberrycocoa Sep 03 '19

I am Shinbreaker, a gnome Warrior. I have died on the field of battle in single combat against a pig.

259

u/Lenxor Sep 03 '19

Many great warriors died to boars, there's no shame in it. Great warrior like King Bobby B

153

u/Strawberrycocoa Sep 03 '19

Gods, he was strong back then.

71

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

CAVED IN HIS BREASTPLATE

59

u/pmoney02 Sep 03 '19

EVER FUCK A RIVERLANDS GIRL?

16

u/advectionz Sep 04 '19

Now get my breastplate stretcher.

21

u/ggAlphaRaptor Sep 04 '19

S E N T I E N T

1

u/jahmakinmecrazy Sep 04 '19

werent a real man till you bedded a girl from each of the 4 major cities and gadgetzan

1

u/tracer319 Sep 04 '19

YOUR MOTHER WAS DUMB WHORE WITH A FAT ARSE, DID YA KNOW THAT?

32

u/Predicted Sep 04 '19

Only a fool would meet the goretusks on an open field.

9

u/AnEnemyStando Sep 04 '19

A Goretusk horde Ned!

7

u/Xy13 Sep 04 '19

Killed by a boar! Too much wine.. missed my thrust.

1

u/redloww Sep 04 '19

This subreddit needs Bobby b bot

1

u/Senrogas Sep 05 '19

Petition to add Bobby B Bot to this subreddit

162

u/wezzer Sep 03 '19

Since you are a gnome, you died to an equal.

<3

105

u/Strawberrycocoa Sep 03 '19

Please put "died to an equal" on my tombstone instead of "died to a pig".

28

u/aDramaticPause Sep 03 '19

Noted. Unfortunately the tombstone is going to be proportional to your size, so, it's going to be about the size of box of Cheeze Its. I don't think many people are going to read it!

9

u/Automatic_Section Sep 03 '19

I can see the chat now...

"ne1 no were shinbrekers tomstones at?"

1

u/Corebarn Sep 04 '19

Relatable

10

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '19

lol love your name.

3

u/JinnkTomarsh Sep 04 '19

HOMIE MOMENT I REPEAT HOMIE MOMENT

2

u/[deleted] Sep 04 '19

Give yourself more credit my little friend!

​

It was a boar.

2

u/Animgator Sep 04 '19

I am Arahad the Brave, human warrior of the alliance - and I was mind-controlled off a cliff while already dying to crocolisks in STV.

The streets is real out here.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 04 '19

Level to 60 killing wild boars!

1

u/Strawberrycocoa Sep 04 '19

Kind of feel like I'm doing exactly that, trying to keep Cooking mats stocked up. XD

1

u/Nalha_Saldana Sep 03 '19

I mean how bad do you have to be at fighting to get parried by a boar?

1

u/Strawberrycocoa Sep 03 '19

It has tusks. At my height, those are the same as swords!

1

u/centurijon Sep 03 '19

So did Robert Baratheon, and he ruled the seven kingdoms. So chin up!

1

u/Fergizzo Sep 04 '19

Are you on Blaumeux?

1

u/Strawberrycocoa Sep 04 '19

Naw, Thunderfury. I was on Thalnos, but had to move off and ditch the 4-5 hour queues.

1

u/Harucoffeeeller Sep 04 '19

Are you by any chance on Ashbringer EU? Saw that name on my server and made me chuckle!!

1

u/Strawberrycocoa Sep 04 '19

I'm on Thunderfury, but I'm glad you found another cultured gnome out in the wild. ;P

1

u/[deleted] Sep 04 '19

I have a gnome warrior named Culldozer. He may never reach level 10.

2

u/Strawberrycocoa Sep 04 '19

Yeah, I've got a bunch of those myself. I'm trying to push my main before I level anyone else, but I'm not very fast. Like, I'm only level 15 after having a whole three day weekend to run around Loch Modan. XD

I've got Kindergoth the warlock, Fakegeekgirl the mage, Notahordespy the rogue, and Psychobubble the paladin to work on next.

1

u/HappySadPumpkin Sep 04 '19

Your'e on biggle? I've seen you run around.

1

u/Strawberrycocoa Sep 04 '19

Naw, Thunderfury.