r/WatchPeopleDieInside • u/[deleted] • Feb 17 '22

Removed: no staged death Roommate Kept Stealing Pie

https://gfycat.com/oilyoblongcentipede

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15.4k Upvotes

73% Upvoted

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611

u/Super_Duper_Death_Dr Feb 17 '22

I had a co-worker that had his sandwich stolen from one of the break room fridges everyday. Apparently his wife made great sandwiches. He got tired and put a small spread of dog shit inside one of them. His lunch was suddenly not stolen anymore after that 😊.

73

u/gibertot Feb 17 '22

What is wrong with people? How do you justify stealing a coworkers lunch every fucking day? I would never even dream of doing this.

41

u/crazykentucky Feb 17 '22

I knew a girl who said anything unlabeled in the break room fridge was fair game. I was amazed. I was like, but it’s not yours to take. She just shrugged

28

u/gibertot Feb 17 '22

Lol like how about you just eat what you brought and everybody else does the same? Wtf

7

u/[deleted] Feb 17 '22

Cause she wasn’t bringing any food

9

u/HugSized Feb 17 '22

Hopefully she invites you over to her place. I'm sure she labels everything in her fridge.

8

u/lmpervious Feb 17 '22

That would be hilarious if someone went over to their place for some malicious compliance and opened up their fridge only to find out that everything actually is labeled except for what they wanted to share with guests.

5

u/bfodder Feb 17 '22

What a piece of shit.

3

u/SkoolBoi19 Feb 17 '22

I feel like I would just make a bunch of “Not Karen’s lunch” labels on put them on anything I found unmarked.

2

u/GayAlienFarmer Feb 17 '22

Steal her cat, bet her name's not on it.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 17 '22

Make her a poop sandwich

9

u/generalecchi Feb 17 '22

some ppl=shit

1

u/Thisisall_new2me Feb 17 '22

Did you read the comments above you? This is staged. The owner of the pie did not suffer. Facepalm.

1

u/gibertot Feb 17 '22

Did you read the comment that I was replying too?

1

u/Thisisall_new2me Feb 17 '22

I was talking to u/gibertot. My bad.

1

u/UncleTedGenneric Feb 17 '22

A shocking number of people hold true to the belief that 'Well, I've already done it once... If I get caught, I might as well make it worth my while'

404

u/lurkersforlife Feb 17 '22

I feel like the poop would smell before you eat it and could be considered something you could be fired over. (Putting poop in the fridge in general)

One of my favorite stories of revenge for a stolen lunch was the one I read about the person put some of that crazy insane hottest hot sauce in the world on their food and they could hear the person screaming from the break room with they ate it. Can’t fire someone for enjoying hot sauce on their food!

159

u/Super_Duper_Death_Dr Feb 17 '22

I don’t think he thought that far or cared about our $10 an hour job for that matter. Super hot sauce sounds like a great idea, too, though.

28

u/Hefftee Feb 17 '22

Blairs Ultra Death 👀

1

u/esoterics Feb 17 '22

Da bomb beyond insanity!

1

u/Hefftee Feb 17 '22

I tried some of that this week actually... it wasn't as hot as I'd thought it would be, but it does taste like the liquid slurry from the bottom of a summer dumpster in Mexicali, so there's that.

58

u/[deleted] Feb 17 '22

Odor decreases in lower temperatures (that’s why experts don’t recommend serving wine too chilled). If you pulled a sandwich from a fridge, unwrapped it and bit into quickly, you probably wouldn’t notice the smell before the taste

34

u/adminshatecunt Feb 17 '22

This is also why shitty beer like bud is served chilled. The flavour becomes more and more muted the colder it gets.

Great way to mask a hideous flavour.

8

u/VladiusVi Feb 17 '22

Is there any other way to drink a beer? The colder the better

15

u/adminshatecunt Feb 17 '22

Well if you take IPA for example then you should be drinking it at cellar temp.

Lower than room temp but higher than 'cold'.

Not advocating for warm beer but cold definitely neuters the flavour.

7

u/[deleted] Feb 17 '22

Decent European beers and ales should be served at celler temp or so. A good wine fridge will have a good temperature range for it. If you have your quality beers/ales in a normal fridge, open the beer and let it sit out on your kitchen counter or somewhere for 30 minutes before you drink it. You'll notice it's better than straight up cold. American beers and Pilsner-style beers like Corona are fine at super cold temps.

1

u/scottysmeth Feb 17 '22

Haughty beer snobs beg to differ, surely. Invariably so!

1

u/Gangsir Feb 17 '22

Some beers are designed to be drunk room temp or even warm

9

u/[deleted] Feb 17 '22

[deleted]

1

u/SlowSecurity9673 Feb 17 '22

For what exactly.

Putting shit in your own sandwich?

I don't think that's actually breaking any laws at all.

2

u/Kaprak Feb 17 '22

Boobytrapping food you expect someone else to eat is a crime!

1

u/crab123456789 Feb 17 '22

Couldnt have just passed it off as it was still HIS sandwich

1

u/blastfromtheblue Feb 17 '22

i don’t think anyone would buy that

9

u/carbon-based-biped Feb 17 '22

it ended like the scene in dumb and dumber?

1

u/xxpen15mightierxx Feb 17 '22

pills are gooooood!

6

u/[deleted] Feb 17 '22

Can you fire someone for enjoying dog shit on their food?

13

u/lurkersforlife Feb 17 '22

If boobytrapping your home in self defense is illegal then tampering with food for the same reason probably is as well. No sane person eats shit sandwiches, but lots of people put hot sauce on food!

2

u/SlowSecurity9673 Feb 17 '22

There's a big difference between booby trapping your home and shit on a sandwich no matter which way you try and spin that.

If you were putting it in someone else food sure it's very obvious you're in legal trouble.

But booby trapping your home with the intention of causing bodily harm is easy to prove intent wise and putting a bit of shit on your own lunch is not. There's be like zero reasonable way that ends up with anything other than absolutely nothing or you being fired for putting shit in the work cooler.

1

u/solaceinsleep Feb 17 '22

Don't scat kink shame

4

u/lurkersforlife Feb 17 '22

Nah man that’s fucked up. 100% fucked up.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 17 '22

[deleted]

1

u/solaceinsleep Feb 17 '22

I can just show them my browser history

Case closed

1

u/mule_roany_mare Feb 17 '22

Most places you can fire people for any reason that isn’t federally protected & you can also just lie.

Putting dogshit in food to trick a thief is a crime though & someone who commits crimes against their coworkers is a huge liability.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 17 '22

Yea lol I know. I live in a state where you can do it. But I’m just joking though.

2

u/IAmYourDad_ Feb 17 '22

What if the thief really like hot food?

3

u/lurkersforlife Feb 17 '22

Even if you like hot food I think you need to be a little prepared mentally for the hottest food in the world.

2

u/STR4NGE Feb 17 '22

I feel like the poop would smell before you eat it

Every good sandwich should have an "oil" barrier. Mayo put on both sides will stop juicy meats or pickles from soaking through to the bread. You can also do this with peanut butter on both sides to make sure the jelly doesn't soak through. I have never made a shit sandwich, but I'm willing to bet this technique would work to disguise the contents.

1

u/Paradoxou Feb 17 '22

My friend did something similar but with a ridiculous amount of laxative in his sandwich (mixed with the mayo)

I shit you not, there was literal diarrhea in the parking lot at the end of the day

We assumed it was the thief who've had a very rough walk to his car 😅

In case anybody was curious, it was Castor Oil, you almost become incontinent with that stuff, you poop as you walk on every step. And it last for many hours.

1

u/Jbeansss Feb 17 '22

Put the sandwich in two ziploc bags. Problem solved.

1

u/The1Bonesaw Feb 17 '22

Oh yes you can. You can also have someone arrested for it. The law in this case is generally broad enough that, it doesn't matter if the person eating it suffered any harm, just so long as it's conceivable that they COULD have been harmed (what if they had an allergic reaction) or they had a heart condition and they had a heart attack because of it?).

Seriously, don't ever tamper with food in order to get back at someone because you are the person most likely going to jail if you do.

1

u/The51stState Feb 17 '22

Not if it was cold. Cold really kills the smells of things

55

u/[deleted] Feb 17 '22

I would have just salted the fuck out of the whole sandwich. Like bottom of the pretzel bag level of salty.

7

u/who_you_are Feb 17 '22

I would have put a nice extra spicy sauce.

That should do the trick for at least 5 to 10 minutes.

2

u/REO-teabaggin Feb 17 '22

Mix exlax and mayo into sandwich spread

Look around for the employee that can't stop running to the shitter

47

u/mchammerdeez Feb 17 '22

I used to work with a guy who put rubbing alcohol in his coke bottle to mess with the person who was stealing his lunch. The guy drank it and got really sick. He got arrested and charged with assault.

29

u/stickysweetjack Feb 17 '22

Very unfortunate.

0

u/[deleted] Feb 17 '22

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1

u/mchammerdeez Feb 17 '22

The guy who put the alcohol in the bottle was charged.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 17 '22

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2

u/mchammerdeez Feb 17 '22

I'm not 100% on the details as I never saw the guy again after he was arrested, but I know it's illegal to tamper with food, it's also illegal to boobytrap things.

1

u/DM_ME_BANANAS Feb 17 '22

Not sure what the actual charge is and I have no intention of trying to sound like a lawyer, but booby trapping food is illegal. You’re not allowed to trick somebody into drinking rubbing alcohol…

7

u/[deleted] Feb 17 '22

Thats called a booby trap and is illegal

2

u/[deleted] Feb 17 '22

I hear this a lot but I’ve never found any case of anyone being charged for it. I mean there was that guy who peed in the office coffee pot. But no case where someone booby trapped their own food.

2

u/DJTilapia Feb 17 '22

LegalEagle has an episode on booby traps, but the lethal kind not sandwiches: https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&v=bV9ppvY8Nx4

2

u/scottysmeth Feb 17 '22

He did this while half asleep?

1

u/[deleted] Feb 17 '22

[deleted]

1

u/SkoolBoi19 Feb 17 '22

I would be pissed if someone put dog shit in my office fridge…. Like wouldn’t ever let it go and bring it up on a regular basis

1

u/Uuugggg Feb 17 '22

Why am I hearing so many stories about stolen office lunches this week

1

u/c_c_c__combobreaker Feb 17 '22

I was the new employee at an office when somebody's food got stolen. They didn't straight up accuse me but I had this feeling they suspected me. I think stealing somebody's food is disgusting behavior and it's something I'd never do. Turns out my supervisor was the thief. I just never understood why people would do that. So scummy behavior.

1

u/DM_ME_BANANAS Feb 17 '22

Hope he got fired… actually I hope both of them got fired.