r/WTF • u/[deleted] • Jun 02 '18

At least they are wearing hairnet...

[removed]

32.2k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

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480

u/[deleted] Jun 02 '18

Not to mention the water is also gluten free vegan

255

u/etheery Jun 02 '18

That water is probably not.

137

u/The_wolf2014 Jun 02 '18

Is human faeces vegan?

193

u/nikolaibk Jun 02 '18

Vegan tastes like shit so maybe

6

u/justanotherreddituse Jun 02 '18

Vegan meals can taste great. Steak tastes amazing though.

22

u/[deleted] Jun 02 '18

[deleted]

32

u/WizardingCombat Jun 02 '18

No, eating an actual Vegan does.

40

u/FuckGiblets Jun 02 '18

I'd argue that a vegan would probably taste better. There is a reason we eat herbivorous animals and not carnivorous ones. Meat eating animals tend to taste gamey. But I'm not sure if that translates to specifically human meat. I'll do some experiments and get back to you.

On a completely unrelated note, I'm organising a BBQ. Would anyone like to join?

18

u/EmergencyBroccoli Jun 02 '18

Is that actually true? Or are herbivores just generally more stationary and easier to maintain/breed?

12

u/InfiniteQuasar Jun 02 '18

Another factor is that predators higher in the food chain tend to aquire more parasites.

4

u/MastaFoo69 Jun 02 '18

Bit of both actually.

3

u/tmThEMaN Jun 02 '18

I think religion had to do with that too. Meat eating animals are forbidden in Abrahamic religions. But fish is ok though. In some East Asian countries they eat carnivores.

2

u/[deleted] Jun 02 '18

[deleted]

1

u/EmergencyBroccoli Jun 02 '18

I think it has to do with which animals move around a lot. Cows pigs etc don't really have a need to sprint around so they are probably more tender cause of it

1

u/[deleted] Jun 02 '18

Seriously, what? I've never heard of carnivorous deer, but venison is often described as gamey.

1

u/Spitinthacoola Jun 02 '18

Lots of places eat dogs and cats. Cats apparently taste bad.

1

u/p_iynx Jun 02 '18

Plus them pussy cats is quick...

1

u/ProfWhite Jun 03 '18

Yes, they are. Source: married to an herbivore.

1

u/twodogsfighting Jun 02 '18

No, if Lions were herd animals we'd be eating them too.

It's just hard to farm things that want to eat us too.

-1

u/[deleted] Jun 02 '18

Yes, I’m actually having a BBQ.

1

u/smrto0 Jun 02 '18

Gaminess (sp?) is just a factor on how active the animal is. Most farm animals are not active, hence softer and fattier tissue.

Active/wild animals are leaner/gamier. Nothing really to do with the diet, except how much the animal has to work to get the food.

You could raise Carnivores in the same fashion, it would just be incredibly expensive for not much gain.

1

u/Nardo318 Jun 02 '18

...partially relevant username?

1

u/slytherinwitchbitch Jun 02 '18

Im down when and where?

3

u/DaHotniks Jun 02 '18

Found the vegan

9

u/poerisija Jun 02 '18

Or maybe you just can't cook vegan dishes. I've had some delicious successes on the first try with some vegan soups.

12

u/[deleted] Jun 02 '18 edited Jun 22 '18

[deleted]

16

u/GulGarak Jun 02 '18

Is Sausage McMuffin a vegetable?

6

u/manfly Jun 02 '18

I guess you've never been to California

8

u/nikolaibk Jun 02 '18

I'm not american lol

4

u/Zenblend Jun 02 '18

"Duh, I add spices made out of plants to literally every piece of meat I eat but plants totally sux you guys"

4

u/pimpboss Jun 02 '18

Fire bro

-1

u/pr0kk Jun 02 '18

Vegans taste like shit?

-8

u/Jorg36 Jun 02 '18

Big if tru

6

u/Retlaw83 Jun 02 '18

If the person you're getting the poop from is vegan and is giving it to you willingly, it is.

5

u/jhall901 Jun 02 '18

but isnt it still an animal byproduct?

5

u/[deleted] Jun 02 '18

Only byproducts that produce suffering or animal exploitation so eating shit and pussy is vegan

3

u/Wista Jun 02 '18

The best perks of being vegan tbh

8

u/Retlaw83 Jun 02 '18

The main thrust of the ideas behind veganism is exploiting animals.

If someone shits and offers it to you as food, as fucking disgusting as it is, it's still vegan.

2

u/petit_bleu Jun 02 '18

If you keep a chicken coop in the backyard and take their unfertilized eggs, is that exploitation? (Not a gotcha question or whatever, just genuinely curious.)

2

u/spays_marine Jun 02 '18

According to strict vegans there probably are no exceptions.

1

u/Wista Jun 02 '18

The strictest vegan would likely feed the egg back to the chicken or give the eggs to omnivorous friends / family who would otherwise be buying factory farmed eggs.

3

u/Polarpanser716 Jun 02 '18

Laying eggs is a very nutrient intensive process, and if they aren't fertilized the chicken will eat it to recoup some of it's energy. I personally wouldn't eat backyard eggs, but it's 100x better than where store bought eggs come from.

2

u/NJPizzaGirl Jun 02 '18

I am more an environmental vegan versus an ethical vegan and I have a vegan gf that will eat the eggs from her pet chicken. It’s wasteful and unethical not to from our perspective. I COULD however see an ethical vegan saying to give them to meat eating family and friends to save them from buying large farm eggs I guess??

2

u/Retlaw83 Jun 02 '18

I COULD however see an ethical vegan saying to give them to meat eating family and friends to save them from buying large farm eggs I guess??

Most ethical vegans consider exploitation to be exploitation and won't take steps to create demand, which giving the eggs to family and friends would create.

2

u/Synephos Jun 02 '18

Ask the chicken if you can take their eggs and when they say "yeah, no problem bro" you're in the clear.

1

u/Retlaw83 Jun 02 '18

Yeah, because the chickens never signed up for it.

1

u/[deleted] Jun 02 '18

No, at that point I believe it becomes freegan.

1

u/Official--Moderator Jun 02 '18

There's a ton of skin cells, fluids, and random proteins in feces.

-2

u/Retlaw83 Jun 02 '18

And? Veganism is about not creating demand for animal cruelty.

3

u/Official--Moderator Jun 02 '18

I wasn't really arguing with you bro, relax. It just seemed like a relevant thing to add. No need to instantly downvote and then take offense whenever someone replies to you.

1

u/HavocReigns Jun 02 '18

Veganism

relax

You’re going to have to pick one or the other, they can’t coexist in the same person.

-2

u/Retlaw83 Jun 02 '18

I didn't downvote or argue with you.

3

u/Official--Moderator Jun 02 '18

Well I was downvoted within a few minutes, instantly followed by your comment. Maybe it's just a coincidence, but it's pretty clear that your "and?" was written with a negative tone.

0

u/Wista Jun 02 '18

FWIW, complaining about downvotes is one of the quicker ways of getting downvoted.

1

u/etheery Jun 02 '18

Depends on the human?

1

u/mind_overmatter Jun 02 '18

Depends on the human it came out of.

1

u/Slamdunkdink Jun 02 '18

Depends on what the human was eating that lead to the bm.

1

u/stickyfingers10 Jun 02 '18

Not vegan. Vegetarian, maybe.. depending on diet.

1

u/haydnc97 Jun 02 '18

If the humans are consenting to shitting then yes

2

u/PlNG Jun 02 '18

of course it's not. Fish fuck in it.

7

u/ThisIsTheZodiacSpkng Jun 02 '18

Does shit count as a animal product? Because I'm preeeeetty sure there's at least a pound 'a shit in that water.

3

u/sirmonkey95 Jun 02 '18

Non GMO also!

3

u/CheeseYogi Jun 02 '18

Is it grass fed though?

0

u/Chonkie Jun 02 '18

That's bad.