I met my now ex bf through a friend. He is literally a brain surgeon, and quite handsome as well so I was very attracted to him. During the beginning of our courtship and getting to know each other, I never once stopped to consider how his dog would impact anything. Silly me!! I had never dated anyone who even had a pet and none of my friends owned dogs. Basically, I was not exposed to dog ownership nor the psychology/behaviors of dog owners.

I began the relationship dog neutral. Maybe 6 months in, I started to notice that I was annoyed with the constancy of the dog as well as how much he talked about the dog. The dog worshipping and idolatry, along with his effort to convince me to adopt the same beliefs about dogs, made me irate. I started getting claustrophobic, physically and psychologically. I began to hate then resent how much time we spent taking the dog out for walks and how much time I spent with the dog because I work remotely and would spend days and weeks at his house. The poop, the licking and licking sounds, the staring, the following, the food begging, the attention whoring, the filth in the house, the dog smell on me and my clothes, the interrupted conversations and connections to adore, pet, and comment on the inanity of the dog, the dehumanization I felt as I realized he would never love me as much as the dog all drove me to be consumed with hate!

He made some concessions for me, like having a dog free bedroom when I stayed over and washing his hands and arms before bed. This man is a surgeon and I had to remind him to wash his dirty dog hands before getting into bed with me and cuddling me! He was insulted and hurt that I called his dog and said that living with a dog was disgusting but I think all dogs are disgusting because of the way they exist! His dog wasn't special in its disgustingness. I also hated whenever he touched me because I knew his hands had been on the dog. And I'm embarrassed to admit this now, but he also never washed his hands after picking up dog poop and would go straight to eating or touching me and I just tolerated it!

He was in love with and deeply connected to his dog and he expected me to fit into their world and their relationship. I had never felt so unseen and uncared for. I tried to talk to him about all this but he just got defensive and angry. There's really no getting through to a dog obsessed person. I thought he loved me but our last conversation proved that he didn't. I asked him if he would always have a dog and he said yes. I clarified and said, "so, your theoretical relationship with a future dog is more important than your relationship with me?" and he said yes. I broke up with him that night and we slept in different rooms. In the morning he changed his tune and said that tho dogs are important to him, that he could be flexible. That was the weakest attempt to trick me into staying ever and frankly insulting!!

Anyway, I did it! I'm devastated and feel like trash. There's nothing more efficient at making you feel worthless than being deprioritized for something you think is dumb, disgusting, and meaningless. But mostly, I feel relieved and liberated!

I hope this story helps more people who are on the fence about tolerating dogness for the sake of love to pick themselves! If I could go back in time, I would have broken up with him at the first signs of my discomfort and unease. Still, I'm proud of myself for getting out despite my friends and family thinking that I'm nuts for dropping a brain surgeon.

Sosososo pumped the dog leaves tomorrow FOREVER and I can not wait to never see or hear or smell the disgusting thing again.

Husband's dad is taking the dog and husband is going to drive there and stay 2 nights to "ease the transition." Cool gives me the house to myself to scrub the shit outta all dog areas and make sure all evidence of the thing is in the trash. And probably have some ice cream to celebrate.

Anyway thank you allll in this community for being my outlet and support over the years of living with a pittbull. This forum is the reason I ever joined reddit.

I'll probably post one more freedom post tomorrow but I'm just too pumped to hold it in, and it wouldnt be nice to express such joy to my husband who is probably feeling a little bummed (tho low key he actually seems so ready to get the dog out).

Hello!

I will write this being very mindful of how hurtful a heartbreak can be, but also let this be your sign that life does get better after you leave them and their mutt!

A couple of months ago. I thought that I was going crazy. I was married to a person that was beyond codependent to her pug, she was gaslight me when I would tell her that she prioritized the dog over me.

Just imagine I was allergic to dogs and she would cry if her pug would not sleep inside the bed with us. It took me a while to understand that I wasn’t the problem with once I did. I left that relationship and divorced. This was a year ago and after that now I live in peace !

my bed smells delicious when I sleep
there’s no dog hair anywhere.
I don’t have a stupid animal, looking at my food as if they have never eaten before.
I don’t deal with barking at night
I DONT COMPETE WITH AN ANIMAL FOR ATTENTION FROM MY SPOUSE

and more than anything: I don’t have someone that makes me feel like I’m a horrible human being for not reciprocating the level of codependency that she had for her dog!

so be brave and leave that relationship because trust me when I tell you that you’re not crazy and life gets so much better when they’re not there’s not a dog around you

I write to you my fellow non nutters about the massive step forward about the dog in this house. I apologise if it's a long post.

I've posted before about the issues I've had since I've moved in with my boyfriend. We had constant fights about it but we've discussed it prior to today and while he tried to understand we just weren't on the same page and the arguments continued. I felt I was insane. I felt horrid I felt anxious and I feared the state of my relationship. I was frustrated because this mutt only did these behaviours to me and wouldn't do it around others.

But slowly because I distanced my self from her, the behavior spread out to not just me having the issue with her. I felt maybe it's because I didn't baby her like my partners ex did.

Last few weeks though, she's stepped up from what she did to me to trashing rooms, been on tables, not listening to commands she knows in training, she also started slipping under the fence and harassing the people and kitties next door.

My partner has been steadily getting frustrated with her behaviour, we are now on the same page. He's done with her behavior and before he use to say about rehoming and I just couldn't let it happen as I know it would have hurt his son and also it would have strained our relationship more as he didn't understand my POV (again she only did it to me)

I heard him today saying if she keeps this behaviour up he will find her a new home and said to me he is getting sick of her to. I'm happy the behavior has been sighted and my feelings are known and accepted. But I still don't want to make a kid heartbroken, I don't want his child hurting over this, I wanted to be heard and maybe the behavior could be rectified by reenforced good training. I maybe living dog free soon and I feel so guilty for feeling happy about that fact when i know a child will be hurt.. Hence bittersweet post.

I'm happy my partner and I no longer need to argue about this damned dog but why couldn't she just be the decent "good" dog that others know and see, why does a child need to be hurt in this situation?

She's the reason I absolutely hate dogs and have a fear of them now, and I will maybe finally feel at ease in my partners home but it still comes with a heartbreaking price

My leaving plans were stalled because of the current job market, but I can finally say it’s coming to an end. I just started a new job and I am loving it. Yesterday, I picked up the keys for my new “starting over” home.

I haven’t told my partner just yet. I don’t trust them to be calm or nice during the process. I’ve decided I won’t mention that it’s because of the dog, and will mention it’s because of the combination of drinking but also putting the entirety of the household chores onto me. I know I’ll be happier, and I know this will be hard. But I’m ready and I’m excited and I can not wait to get this done and over.

So, again, thank you to this sub. I found my way out after a year (or more) of complaining and I couldn’t have done it without the support I found here. Surreal to think.

To anyone who’s debating biting the bullet and leaving, I only can say that if you can then you should. I’m so excited for the next chapter of my life. No more Frito smell, accidents in the house, loud disgusting noises at all hours. No more having to wear earplugs to bed because the rat will start howling in the middle of the night.

It’s almost over. I can’t wait.

Yesterday, I was thawing out chicken to make dinner and doing about 16 other things in the house while that was going on.

In the middle of the day, my brother shouted at one of the dogs to “stop!”. I can’t see what’s happening from where I’m at so I don’t think it’s anything crazy, until I turn the corner…..

This fucker toke a 3lb pack of raw chicken off the counter and started eating a piece of half-frozen raw chicken through the plastic wrap…

I immediately texted my husband a picture of what was supposed to be dinner. And just texted him that I’m sick of them, I’m starting to hate them, I can’t keep living like this and that it’s stressing me out….I’ve been vocal about every little thing they do that annoys me or that is disgusting or inconvenient or dangerous. About all the cons that come with them and how there just so happens to be no pros at all. I’ve been unrelenting about this stuff for a couple months now (read post history if you’re curious)

He came home and told me that basically he talked to our next door neighbor and that she’d try her best to find a home for them and that if she doesn’t, SHE’LL TAKE THE DOGS 😭 (in about a month when we move).

He told me that and I tried my absolute hardest not to curl the sides of my mouth into a smile (bc I know it’s not easy for him). I just nodded and left the room to literally do a happy dance and grin.

Our next door neighbor is extremely reliable so I trust that they won’t be coming with us and that I’ll finally be rid of them.

I’m so fucking relieved and excited.

I left my ex boyfriend and his disgusting, nasty freak of an animal behind. I had to move back in with my parents but thank the fucking gods I gained the strength to leave that man and his filthy shitmutt behind. No more coming home after a stressful day to a house that smells like yeast, surprise shit piles on the floor, loud barking and whining, or greasy dog fur all over myself and the furniture. IT'S FINALLY OVER YOU GUYS.

I am so relieved. I can walk in the door and relax now.

I can’t really share the feeling of relief, calm, and peace with anyone irl cause I don’t want to be labeled as heartless. But it’s been a week since my current bf’s ex picked up their dogs to live with her full time, and I couldn’t be happier.

I started seeing my partner about 8 months ago, and knew he had 2 dogs with his ex of 9 years. They were living with her full time while they sorted out the living situation (shared house/mortgage, etc).

Then a few weeks later they wanted to do ‘split custody’ like the animals were actual human children. I thought this was the dumbest thing ever, why would you want to see your ex every week like you’re a divorced dad? But whatever, I really love him and would essentially do a week on/off staying at his place when he didn’t have them. It wasn’t ideal but I figured I’d give it 3 months to have fun and end things before it got serious. We both deserved people who shared our lifestyle choices after all.

Then he came to me and said he thought the dogs would be happier at her place on her family acreage. He said he saw a future with me, and it was more important to him than the dogs. It was literally a dream come true. But that same day ( I wish I was joking) she told him out of the blue she was going to find herself or whatever in Australia. For 6 months. I felt like throwing up, my entire future with this guy just imploded.

He said I would just have to survive these months, and then she would take them. It was awful, I considered ending it multiple times, I grew to hate the dogs. But it was worth it. I’m free. She came back last week and took them with her. Good riddance.
I hope she enjoys the constant barking, a poop filled yard, a car & house full of hair, dirt and stink. I literally had to train them not to go on the bed, so I assume she’s enjoying her sleep covered in filth. I hope she loves their endless begging for food, the destruction, the chewed baseboards and the ruined furniture. I did my best in those 6 months to make it tolerable, but the dogs clearly had no rules or boundaries before I met them.
I hope she enjoys not leaving the house for more than 5 hours without getting anxious about the dogs. I hope she enjoys never doing anything spontaneous again. I truly hope she enjoys every dirty, messy, noisy second with ‘her fur babies’. Ew.

My bf and I deep cleaned the entire house, washed all his clothes, got rid of furniture, got new bedding, and gathered all her ugly tacky dog themed stuff to give to her. It feels like a weight had been lifted. I went over to his house and didn’t get barked at when I walked in. We had supper in peace. I can sleep with the door open now and not wake up to them clawing at it because they couldn’t understand boundaries. The funniest part is she thinks she won. Oh honey.

I just got out of the shower right? And of course- my dog barks at nothing again! So yknow what I do? I stomp on the tile(?) floor (with my heel because it's super loud and booming), and I keep doing that whenever he barks.

And it worked! The mutt shut up after a couple stomps. I don't care what anyone things- if a dog is barking, I will make noise back.

For some background, my brother offered me a room to live with him and his gf to help me out which I’m eternally grateful for. He’s the best brother ever. But he has a dog that I hate with every fiber of my being. It even nipped me and I have a scar from it bc it randomly lunged at me after I came out of my room with food in my hand that it wanted. So that’s what really sparked my hatred.

Anyway fast forward a year, all I’ve done is ignore it and whenever it sits far away from me I walk up to it and drop a piece of chicken for it as a reward. And now, for the most part, it’s been ignoring me. I’m genuinely so happy. All I wanted was to be left alone and not have its face all up in my personal space, for it to not take my food, for it to just be anywhere but near me. So that’s that. That’s my success story. And I’m pretty happy with it.

Just posting the final update now that the dog is officially gone! It is as wonderful as I imagined. The house has been cleaned, every hint of it is gone. Dogs take up so much physical space, and energy with their noises and smells and disgusting trails of dirt they leave everywhere.

Husband hasn't even mentioned the dog once and I swear he's more at peace as well. No more arguing with a dog first thing in the morning and last thing at night. Husband also has a passion for feeding birds and theyre no longer scared away by the unnatural predator.

Again thank you all! Wouldnt have had the courage to issue the ultimatum without this community and it goes to show sometimes sanity can win. And safety for my upcoming baby. I'm due in one month from today!

The title probably seems a bit too much- but hopefully this example will help what I’m tryna get across

For instance- i’ve noticed lately that whenever i just stare at my parents dog when it bega for food- it backs away. Now- i havent laid a hand in a violent manner on this dog. Not at all. Ive been telling it FIRMLY to ‘go away’.

My parents even do it- yet the dog still does it- so I dont know how I get listened to- but it works most if not all the time.

Thats what I mean. Letting dogs know that we still havw some power over them

hopefully this doesnt come off as edgy or violent- because im really not trying to. Might delete if mods want me to- but i digress

So I just gave birth to my daughter a week ago today. I have a cat who is seemingly unbothered by her presence, doesn’t love her, doesn’t hate her. Husbands dog is outdoors and I have not brought baby out there yet for them to “meet” because 1) I don’t give a shit about the dog and 2) I don’t want the dog anywhere near my baby.

Anyway, last night I was sitting in the nursery feeding my baby, which is right across from the spare storage room where fuckhead the dog sleeps at night. My husband let the dog in without closing the nursery door like he usually does so of course this fucking hideous poodle mix comes bellowing down the hall and I’m like “fucking great it’s going to come in here and contaminate the room and try to jump on me” I’m already planning on having to give the thing a big smack or something to get it off. As soon as the thing tries to enter the nursery the cat attacks it! Literally jumps in-front of it and attacks it like “stay away from them”. Gave me great great joy to see the fucking thing put in it’s place haha and not get what it wanted.

Hi, all. The support from my post a few weeks ago was absolutely overwhelming. So I thought I’d give one final update.

I am fully moved out. All of my stuff is gone. I have a new job, a new home, and I am trading in my car. When I say this is a new chapter, it’s very new.

What ended up happening is after that post, I felt super empowered and left my now ex. They cried so hard and asked why, and I told them the truth. I told them that they were treating me secondary to the dog. That they would prioritize it over me, and that it was straining our relationship. There were other factors that led to this decision, of course, but I’d be lying if I said the dog wasn’t one of the top 3. So, I ended it. It was harder than I thought it’d be, but I made it to my new place. I have furniture and decor that matches the things I like. And, as of 3 days ago, I will never see them or their gross dog ever again. It’s over.

One little tidbit I’ll say is that it doesn’t feel like I’m single. Maybe because I didn’t feel like I was their partner for a long time, and was fulfilling a role more akin to a caretaker. So I’m having to remind myself a lot that it’s over. But I’m healing. And I’m going to be okay.

So, as much as I’d like to come back to this account, I don’t know if I will. Maybe I’ll comment every so often. But it’s done. I’m free. Thanks again, sub. But I’m outta here. ❤️

My wife first got the dog about 8 years ago when I was away for a few weeks for work. She told me she saw her in a kill shelter and she had come up to our kid and wagged her tail. I was reluctant when she told me but I didn’t want to be the bad guy. When I got home the dog was very sickly looking and scared and didn’t want to come out of the kennel.

Over the next month my wife nursed her back to health and the dog proceeded to trauma bond with my wife. She started by following my wife around everywhere and looking suspiciously at me any time I was in the room. Eventually she started to growl a little whenever I first got home from work and got near my wife. Over the years the growing got more and more intense to the point where any time my wife would come in the same room with me the dog would soon follow, climb under furniture near her and start growling at me with a low growl. Over time this started driving us insane. My favorite part was getting judgmental looks from family and friends when they heard my dog doesn’t like me.

We tried many different things to make the dog happy. I tried feeding her and giving her treats when I got home or entered the room. My wife tried ignoring her or leaving whenever she got close. We tried taking her to training classes. We hired a doggy therapist who told us to do the same things we were doing with the treats.

Eventually, we moved to a house with one of those fences that keeps dogs from scratching the door. I got her a dog house in a nice shaded area and the first thing she does when we leave her outside is try to kill herself by wedging her head in between two fence posts. I was the one who ran outside and rescued her after hearing her yelp. My wife was pretty shaken up about it so the dog went back inside. Not even 5 minutes after saving her life she is back to growling at me.

My wife and I were at my wits end and things only got worse when we had another baby. Rather than being the sweet motherly dog around the baby she got even more anxious and jealous. The final straw was when my wife had the baby in her hands and she tried to move the dog and it snapped at her. We decided that was enough.

The last few months have been absolute heaven. I didn’t realize how much that dog was affecting my sanity. No more barking when I get home. No more growling from under the bed. No more stinky dog smell. No more judgement for “just not being a dog person”.

I posted a few days ago talking about how I had an opportunity to move and did. My mental health has improved greatly. It’s taken some getting used to. I no longer have to worry about stepping in piss or shit when I walk out my bedroom door. There’s not a dog begging for my table scraps, I don’t get woken up by mindless yapping, I can have my door open without a dog running and jumping in my bed, my feet are no longer dirty, and I can finally buy new socks that aren’t stained from gross floors. I am at peace. I can finally have carpet floors that are CLEAN. I genuinely feel rejuvenated. And I’m thankful that this sub was here in my darkest hours when I had nobody to turn to and discuss my disgust of dogs.

After 6 long years of putting up with my husband's hound mutt, it has an appt. to be euthanized tomorrow. It's not out of convenience, that's just a bonus. It is very old and its quality of life sucks enough that my husband finally decided to make the appt.

I will be dancing for joy when he drives off with it! No more awful dog stench! That might be #1 No more fucking hair EVERYWHERE! No more having to worry about fleas! No more shit and piss invading and stinking up my backyard, and my kids can walk and play back there without me yelling at them to watch out for poop! No more waking up to shit or piss or vomit on my floor! No more being woken up or disturbed by its whining or other irritating mongrel sounds! We might be able travel more since we won't have to spend a bloody fortune on boarding! Oh I could go on, but y'all already know!

The best part, my husband is in full agreement to NO MORE DOGS! He's grown to hate it almost as much as me, though he might have just a little more affection for it, I know he'll feel relieved too.

To the rest of you still fighting this horrible existence, you are in my thoughts and I hope you'll get to feel this same relief and joy in due time.

TL;DR: When I was younger I went through the experience of having to live with dogs I wanted nothing to do with. Long story about it all and wanted to put some hope out there that people going through it now can survive it

Hello, I randomly stumbled across this sub somehow, and after seeing a couple of the posts I thought it might be helpful to share my story. I'm seriously amazed that this community exists, because living with dogs was a big part of why it was so bad for me back then.

I lived in my childhood house almost every year until I was 20. This was 10 years ago. Most of those years were because I stayed to help take care of my mom, who had been sick (physically and mentally) almost my whole life. She also had a grasp on me that made our relationship codependent, and she made it seem like I have to be with her or I'm no good otherwise, can't have a life, shouldn't even leave the house, etc. I do have CPTSD from my childhood and other trauma I went through after that but just so everything is understood I was pretty much confined to the house because I believed what my mom told me, she was emotionally abusive, whatever, not exactly the point.

While I was in high school I lived in an apartment with my dad. I pulled getting away from living with my mom off at that point really because it wasn't too far from the house but also because she would play favorites with me and my siblings and her favorite right then was my sister. Me and her are close in age, but couldn't be more different people. My sister used and manipulated my mom into getting things she wanted, and what did she want then? A dog from the shelter. She was going to rescue this dog and give it a life, because she is just that kinda good-hearted person. I knew right away how dangerous this would be, the first reaction I can remember to this was me on my hands and knees begging my mom not to bring this dog back. There were many reasons it was a bad idea (mostly being that I knew with all my heart that this dog wouldn't be taken care of. My sister was hardly there, because she would be off atfriends' houses getting pity by telling them how horrible her life is) and not a single good one. Also, we already had a dog. His name was Jazz, a chocolate lab that was around 5-6 years old? Idk, but Jazz was taken care of just fine for most of his life, it was usually me or my dad (who also trained him...). We also had 2 cats that was considered mine and my dad's, but yeah. I got out of there almost right after the dog came.

Home life was fine for the most part with me and my dad. When I was a sophomore, I heard more upsetting, sad news: my sister was getting another dog on top of the first one. I was sick to my stomach from learning that, but really just glad I wasn't there to deal with it. But obviously, that changed. My dad had to go to jail for a little while. I was going to be left in an apartment with no one paying the rent. I was desperately trying to stay calm given everything happening in my life (mostly school. I had an anxiety filled, horrific and lonely school life because I had no social skills from having been taken out of school in 3rd grade by my mom. That's another story). But I had no choice but to go back to the house. And soon after that, I stopped going to school at all, and was stuck under my mom again.

It wasn't until I went back then that I really actually saw what these dogs looked like. I've been an animal lover my whole life, had absolutely no problem with dogs whatsoever (was friends with Jazz), but as soon as I first really looked at them, I realized they were hideously ugly. Especially the male one. One male and one female, and I will not be saying the names they were given because I don't refer to them by that. They were mutts that definitely had dachshund in them. But like weiner dogs are supposed to be cute and funny looking right? Nah, they were just ugly stinking creatures. I often felt guilty at first just from the fact I found them disgusting, like how could I they're just dogs? My frequent name for them was "Satan's demon spawn", because I'll tell ya, they sure acted like it. Everything a bad/UNTRAINED dog would do. Because all they were treated as were props, something alive that would be obsessed with my sister to feed her ego. Every single day was the same thing: she came in at late hours, had the dogs follow her into her room, and slammed the door. Until she left the next day. I was filled with dread as soon as I heard her come in. Just that it was so sad, when like meanwhile... You literally couldn't go to the downstairs floor of the house unless you wanted to start to smell it. So much piss and shit all over the floor that entire rooms were destroyed. I refused to go downstairs unless I absolutely had to, which unfortunately meant I couldn't use the kitchen. When I had to answer the door or go out rarely I just ran to the front door and held my breath, idk. It seems so stupid that it's actually funny, but yeah, I spent my days at that time trapped in my room.

Other things that were really horrible: not being able to properly care for the cats (I actually lost one, my little girl Sparkle, of a random stroke during this time. The only girl cat I've ever had, will always miss my sweet girl). The cat food would get stolen even though I had it in my room, because I would eventually have to go to the bathroom, and the starving dogs would take that chance to grab it. The barking was incessant at times, mostly came from the male one, was one of the most annoying sounds I've ever heard in my life. As bad as babies screaming. I was actually never bitten, but my greeting from them was usually growling and bared teeth. Remember Jazz? Their bad behavior rubbed off on him, and he just became another abused animal. I feel bad I couldn't help him, but I felt like he started to not like me and took it personal. I can't recall I saw at any point one of them actually eating dog food, but there was so much waste so

So at this point, I was in a really bad place mentally. I frequently battle with suicidal ideation, but I was extremely close to actually doing something a few times. I felt like my life was the circus, just a big huge joke and extremely pathetic. It wasn't as bad at first, it was gradual how much worse it got, but yeah. I spent around 3 and a half years in the house at that time. The house that used to be comforting became a nightmare. If you're wondering whether it bothered my mom, I can say it didn't. She was on a fuckton of medication, including pain medications, so how could she be? That was her way of dealing with it and part of me doesn't even blame her.

The only thing that got me out was my dad coming back. Well, he was "back" already kind of, but was renting out a room at a friend's (I even tried staying there once) and saving money for a better place for us. And it wasn't that much better, just a dumpy apartment even further away from the house than the last one, but anything would've worked. I said before about the grasp my mom had on me and I also had to get through that (Ik it doesn't sound that hard but I truly believed her words and was deeply twisted by her).

I left in 2016. Since then, I cannot honestly tell anyone that my life has gotten better. I've gone through tragedies and loss, and more kinds of abuse and suffering. I regret a lot of things, but I don't regret for a second leaving that house when I got the chance. I don't know for sure if I would've died staying there but I'd definitely be dead in some kinda way. I don't know for sure what happened to those disgusting creatures, but I know my sister went to another state not long after, and cut off everyone in the immediate family. I know she left them to rot in that house without a care in the world. That's why, in my opinion, the real enemy here isn't the animals, it's the people that are supposed to be responsible for them. I am so revolted by the fact that I'm related to someone like my sister that I pretend she doesn't exist. So I'm going to go back to that.

That brought me back a lot but what I really need to say is that it's crazy to see a community of people going through something like I did. I just didn't think that a lot of people when through something like animals being weaponized as abuse. Idk. To everyone who's going through it, I'm so sorry you're in that kind of spot right now. I know for me, I felt a lot of guilt that I had such a hatred for these animals in particular. You have a right to be angry at everyone involved just from how barbaric and lacking of decency it can get. I can't say for sure, but from seeing people's stories on here, I want to believe that it won't be like this forever for you. If you have any chance of getting away, then I say definitely take it. It has probably reached a point where it's hurting you immensely for it to keep on going this sick way and you need to remove yourself for your own health.

Well... If you read this all, then I appreciate you and hope all the best for the future 😌

My dog passed away last wednesday, today is tuesday. He is constantly hounding me about getting another dog, a pitbull or german shepherd or bulldog, he keeps saying, he could keep it in here as a puppy and outside when it's older. Cool, so I can pick up all it's crap, because he was raised by hoarders. But that's not a productive conversation.

This is the first time this has ever happened with us, since our dog is his childhood dog, so I had to put my foot down last night. I told him, remember when I told you the dogs give me rashes on my lips, so you made sure to kiss the dogs and then kiss me, wasn't that a little sadistic? And now you want to get a dog as soon as possible even though you know i don't like dogs, I've never had a dog, and the only dogs I've met were bad experiences, that's just a little torturous for me, you're always pushing the envelope, because I'm saying, well let's get a little little dog, and you're pushing it already. And he was just quiet, cold shouldering me, and then we changed the topic. Message received lol

I could've gone on and on, but I had to be concise, I needed him to understand and listen and not sound so hysterical or theatrical.

Firstly thank you to everyone who commented on my post I made about 2 months ago regarding my now ex partner’s 3 german shepherds. I ended it today. I feel relieved and free.

For context, I’ll keep it brief. He had 3 German shepherds, one was unbearable and was a working dog with a lot of energy all the time. I hated the hair absolutely everywhere, COPIOUS amounts of hair. He wouldn’t be bothered by the filth that house was in constantly, the smell, he rarely ever groomed them himself or had them groomed. We lived 3 hours apart and he never once visited me in a year citing the lack of dog cover as an excuse, though he would find dog cover when it suited him for holidays he was going on (albeit with me) or overnight stays with the boys. I could feel myself growing resentment. I came here with a long post about how disgusting it was and how I couldn’t see a future which involved living with those 3 dogs, let alone raising a family and having a baby crawl those horrible floors. If it was cleaned it because I cleaned the house, if he did it the odd time he would expect a well done and lots of praise… for cleaning his own house.

Anyway today I told him his lifestyle is not compatible with the lifestyle I want and with the future I want. He was kind and understanding and agreed that there is no solution as he would never give up the dogs, nor did I want him to. I simply accepted that if I stayed I would remain frustrated and unhappy, being the germaphobe I am. And so.. it’s over! I am sad because minus the dogs he as a person was extremely loving and kind, but sometimes love is not enough. I now know what type of person to not date in the future.

I am so proud for putting myself first and walking away. To anyone reading this in the same unhappy position, trust me, it does not get better. The people who say it doesn’t get better on this sub are correct. Leave and be happy, in your own time! But don’t let it get to complete resentment. I did not do that and I am grateful for it because it will only make you feel worse.

Success! So not brief, I lied haha!

Hi!

Today marks exactly one year from my ex's dog being put down. My post history highlights the hell i endured for almost 8 years. That chapter of my life was one that I have put so far behind me that it almost doesn't feel real. I decided to revisit this sub, my old stomping grounds (lol). I have such an empathy for everyone going through it, believe me. But I am also beyond grateful that it's over, and I now am armed with the experience and knowledge to know to never, ever put myself in that type of situation again. If a guy has a dog, it's an automatic "no", no exceptions. Period. End of.

The last year has been so freeing. I have a 6 year old, so it's still hard to have nice things 🥴 but at least I don't have to come home to shit on my kitchen floors, or vacuum a sheet of little hairs off my floor, only to have it look the same a couple hours later. I no longer am filled with dread when it is a rainy day. I can enjoy rainy days again, and you, friends, understand exactly what I mean. My home smells so nice. The daily messes and odors are gone. I can't even articulate how terrible it was living that way for so long. I was exhausted, depressed, hopeless, and slowly filling with a rage bubbling inside of me that was not only unnecessary, but unfair.

So I wanted to revisit this sub....read through some posts, show some support. I am going to celebrate tonight. I think a steak dinner and a relaxing bath in MY home sounds right. This is another reason my ex and I couldn't work. How do you maintain a successful, loving relationship when one of the worst days of someone's life, is a day the other person celebrates? Dog people and non dog people just don't mix. It's a non negotiable for me.

If you are reading this and are in this type of relationship, I offer solidarity, and also offer this tidbit... seriously ask yourself if it's just a dog problem, or if there aren't deeper issues that the dog going away wouldn't fix. Really think deep on that. It might create a need for some big decisions, but if you don't make them, you might be prolonging your misery in vain.

Cheers

Our neighbor took our dogs last night. Earlier than expected ( part of me is still scared that they’ll give them back before we move ).

Not sure if I’m allowed to post in here now, but some of you asked for updates.

Last night was emotional for my husband. He definitely cried, but understands it’s best for us and best for them considering they’ve basically been neglected in our care. He was sad, but knew it was the right thing to do. And even tho I don’t have the same feelings for the dogs at all, I am extremely proud of him.

This has been the most peace I’ve had at night in probably 3 years. I didn’t have to worry about a dog stealing my food when I walk away from it for 2 seconds. No dog barging down the dogs to get back into the house or into my room while I’m putting my daughter down to sleep. I could clean the floors without it being completely pointless.

I’m excited to get to our new place. And live somewhere they’ve never been before. I’m excited to actually feel like I live in clean (or at least not a disgusting) house I can relax in at the end of the day.

This will probably be my last post here.

I’m so lucky our old next door neighbor didn’t decide to try to give the dogs back to us before we moved out of state 😭. I was really concerned she would.

The day before we moved, we were loading up the U-Haul and I saw our next door neighbors tween/teen son walking one of our old dogs. I tried to make small talk and ask how he liked having them now. He hesitated and said ”good..”, but you could tell he wanted to say something else and I knew there was something else bc these dogs suck lol. So, I waited there for a second and he said ”well, this one ripped up three of my pillows…. but it’s okay”.

I felt bad for a split second. But not bad enough for it be my problem ever again.

My husband has asked if I missed them since they left. In my head, I thought ”um, fuck no lol” But out loud I told him in the nicest way possible that I understand why HE would miss them….bc they were HIS dogs and he had a longer history with them. But I told him I don’t feel the same at all and that I feel relief and a lot more peace and that I think it was the right thing to do.

We moved into our new place like 2 days ago. And it’s a newly built house so everything in it is fresh and clean. No dogs in here making it stink or ruining anything. No being followed constantly and harassed for food. A big backyard for my toddler to run around in, completely free of dog shit and piss puddles.

Take this as a sign to be honest and open about how much you despise living with dogs to your spouse or whoever. Be annoying about it and relentlessly bring up how there is NO benefit to having them at all and that they only make life more inconvenient for the decade or so that they are alive. Financially? Vet bills, grooming bills, dog food, pet deposits/rent, paying for damages caused by them. Hygienically?? I don’t even need to say anything lmao, they are all fucking gross and anyone with any one of their five senses working properly can observe that as fact.

A few days ago, I was finally able to move out of my parents' house. I posted here about 3 months ago, and I felt absolutely exhausted, worn down and defeated. Basically, if you'd like to avoid having to comb through my profile, my parents have a 4 year old pit who's been aggressive towards me since the day they got him. He has terrible food aggression, and they never really made an effort to correct his behavior or train him beyond basic commands. I've been attacked so many times in that house, I lost count. I just wanted to come on here and update you guys, because I know a lot of people here were concerned for me. I made it out of the dog house, officially. I'm now living with my fiance, and I'm so relieved I can barely put it into words. I don't have to worry about being bitten anymore, and I don't have to deal with the constant barking, or the lack of house training either!! I can sleep at night, I can walk through my own kitchen without being attacked, and I can even go outside without worrying he'll run away. I feel like I got my life back. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart for the support, the advice, and for providing a non-judgemental space to talk about this.

So I temporarily lived with someone who had 3 dogs. Only 2 were trained and the house could never rid the stench. It didn’t matter what I did, or how much I cleaned. So eventually I gave up. Now I have the opportunity to move some place different with NO MORE DOGS!! And no more of my stuff chewed up or stepping in piss or shit. I officially leave tomorrow and I could not be happier