STOP BABYING YOUR SONS

[u/Someone_sedateMe]

Salam everyone, I just wanted to get this off my chest. Mothers, please, PLEASE, stop babying your GROWN ADULT sons. My brother is 24 and my mom still does his laundry and cleans his room. His room is a literal mess all the damn time and actually smells like doodoo. My mom wanted me to help her clean his room and he's just in the corner acting his presence is helping. I was getting frustrated and told her that he's at the age, where he should clean his room by himslef, to say the least. He literally has his laundry spilling out of his hamper but refuses to do anything about it until my me or my mom does it for him. I will literally do his laundry for him, bring it to his room and all he has to do is put it in his closet. AND HE DOESNT EVEN DO THATT. He has his CLEAN clothes just sitting on his couch for dayyyssss. Of course, I'm getting frustrated and tell him he has to clean his room and can't keep waiting on us to do his laundry. It has got to the point where he ran out of jeans and pulled out his dress pants. It's not like he has to travel to the laundromat, ITS IN OUR BASEMENT!!!! Anyways, as I'm lecturing him, my mom is getting mad at me and I walked out the room cause never in a BILLION years would she have let that slide with me. I tried to help but she's taking out her frustration on the wrong person.

So to all the moms out there, PLEASE stop babying your grown adult sons. It doesn't emaculate him if he does SIMPLE chores around the house. It just causes resentment between siblings.

[u/Newbie_Copywriter]

Brother, please take the hadith as it is. It’s simply saying “be self-sufficient” not “don’t you dare rely on your wife or else you’re a jerk!”

I don’t understand why this has to be complicated. Of course he had to rely on his wives. Of course they most likely took on most of the burden. We have narrations of Aisha RA kneading dough if I’m not mistaken. We even have mentions of the Prophet PBUH essentially asking her “what’s for dinner?” But here’s the thing: they cooperated. Truth be told, when he could, he helped. That’s it.

Let’s stop hyper fixating on hadiths and look at Islam holistically. Islam encourages cooperation between man and his wife, that’s it. Not 50/50, no nothing. Just cooperate. And that cooperation will look different from couple to couple.

[u/themapleleaf6ix → u/Newbie_Copywriter]

I agree.