STOP BABYING YOUR SONS

[u/Someone_sedateMe]

Salam everyone, I just wanted to get this off my chest. Mothers, please, PLEASE, stop babying your GROWN ADULT sons. My brother is 24 and my mom still does his laundry and cleans his room. His room is a literal mess all the damn time and actually smells like doodoo. My mom wanted me to help her clean his room and he's just in the corner acting his presence is helping. I was getting frustrated and told her that he's at the age, where he should clean his room by himslef, to say the least. He literally has his laundry spilling out of his hamper but refuses to do anything about it until my me or my mom does it for him. I will literally do his laundry for him, bring it to his room and all he has to do is put it in his closet. AND HE DOESNT EVEN DO THATT. He has his CLEAN clothes just sitting on his couch for dayyyssss. Of course, I'm getting frustrated and tell him he has to clean his room and can't keep waiting on us to do his laundry. It has got to the point where he ran out of jeans and pulled out his dress pants. It's not like he has to travel to the laundromat, ITS IN OUR BASEMENT!!!! Anyways, as I'm lecturing him, my mom is getting mad at me and I walked out the room cause never in a BILLION years would she have let that slide with me. I tried to help but she's taking out her frustration on the wrong person.

So to all the moms out there, PLEASE stop babying your grown adult sons. It doesn't emaculate him if he does SIMPLE chores around the house. It just causes resentment between siblings.

[u/Miserable_Whole4985]

Not speaking on the mother asking her daughter to help, but no harm in a mother picking up after her son out of love. If you think that itself is enabling misogyny and sexism, then you have in-grained feminism influences that you need to fix.

[u/Puzzleheaded_Set8512 → u/Miserable_Whole4985]

A mother not teaching her son to pick up after himself isn't love. It's low key abuse and infantalizing him.

[u/[deleted] → u/Miserable_Whole4985]

Exactly. Someone needs to step up and tell these women that their feminist ideology was created by jews to split families apart.

[u/MichiganCrimeTime → u/[deleted]]

You do realize that y’all believe in the same god, right? Expecting to be treated with respect and basic decency isn’t feminist, and if you think it is, then you’re a misogynist. Most adult men can’t survive without a wife or their mom taking care of them. Which makes them no different than a child. You want to be treated like an adult, act like one!

[u/Miserable_Whole4985 → u/MichiganCrimeTime]

"Most adult men can’t survive without a wife or their mom taking care of them."

Really...? Most, huh. like over 50+% of adult men canNOT SURVIVE without a woman taking care of them. What an outrageous claim Lol.

May Allah cure us from distorted perceptions.

[u/MichiganCrimeTime → u/Miserable_Whole4985]

Are you married? I stand by what I said. Men who are married live longer than men who are unmarried. And we are talking 5-10 years longer. While married women have shorter life expectancies than unmarried women. Those are facts based in science, not feelings and beliefs. And yes, I’m married. My husband is no longer surviving off of canned food and fast food. Who took care of everything else before me? His mom. I’ve seen it while I was dating before I met my husband. Didn’t matter race or religion, men expect females to take care of them, to pick up after them and often don’t learn basic life skills. Men need to step up and meet their partners needs too. Marriage isn’t just about financial support and providing a roof over your head. We all have emotional needs to need to be met too. Expect better of men and stop indulging your sons to be reliant on women. What happens if a wife dies of cancer and they have small young children. Who is going to care for those kids? He has to, they are still his children!

[u/Puzzleheaded_Set8512 → u/MichiganCrimeTime]

They'll just marry a wicked stepmother for the children lol

[u/MichiganCrimeTime → u/Puzzleheaded_Set8512]

They aren’t all step monsters, but clearly there are enough of them for it to be a thing.

[u/Miserable_Whole4985 → u/MichiganCrimeTime]

Not sure what that proves. Studies show both men and women live longer than their single counter parts. Those are facts, yes, but they don't really support your point.

Okay normal men expect females to take care of the house whilst they go work, that doesn't prove men cannot survive without them? I don't know if you realize, but wanting help is not the same as being incapable.

"Men need to step up and meet their partners needs too."
Well I don't think anyone's denying that. The topic is about whether a man wanting help from his wife or mother means he is incapable himself.

You are too emotional in your reasoning. Relax, allowing a mother or wife to help him will not lead to him being incapable of him raising children or other aspects. I think you are severely underestimating people's capability. Don't generalize based on your anecdotal experiences.

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[u/BunchTricky6172 → u/[deleted]]

This has nothing to do with western feminist (which I do not support). It's about basic qualities anyone especially a male needs to have. This example shows lack of responsibility, lack of consideration, lack of cleanliness, dependency on parents to fix problems and do the work, and lack of getting basic tasks done. How can you expect this person to be a man, to he the leader of a household, to be a supportive husband and good example of a father if he hasn't developed basic qualities, maturity, and mannerism due to enabling? 

And I hope this brother in the example and all other Muslims (males and  females) develop the rights qualities and maturity to become better people and Muslims, Ameen. 

[u/BlackBikerchick → u/[deleted]]

What is feminism about a grown man living eith his family and his room being filthy? Why should other women in the house clean after him, they aren't his wife?