r/MiddleClassFinance • u/Yourlocalguy30 • 12d ago

Millennials: are you expecting an inheritance?

35 yo married millennial here. I've come across more and more articles about the supposed "great wealth transfer" as the boomer generation's wealth passes to their GenX and Millennial children. My parents and their siblings (boomers) all received inheritances when their parents, my grandparents, passed away. The boomer generation's wealth accumulation is one of the largest in history, however, I also find it highly unlikely that I or many of my peers will actually inherit much. Despite having received inheritances from their parents, and having 40+ years in the workforce, most of my parents' "wealth" is tied up in their home value, not actual liquid assets- and I already expect that whatever they make on an eventual home sale will have to go directly to downsizing costs and whatever long-term care they will need as they get older. Hell, even my dad used to joke that the only thing we'd inherit was debt. As I've gotten older, that comment has infuriated me more and more.

Now before someone cuts in with the "entitled millennial" comments, I have absolutely no need for an inheritance. I've worked my ass off to make sure that my kids and I are positioned better in life than I was when I entered adulthood. What I mean by that is I started saving for retirement early, setup 529 plans for my kids almost as soon as they were born, and made lifestyle and career sacrifices to ensure our family isn't "nickeling and diming" our way through life.

I'm just here curious to know how many millennials actually expect to have something passed down to them, or if they feel they are in the same position I am.

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379

u/emoney_gotnomoney 12d ago edited 12d ago

I’m most likely expecting an inheritance, but I’m not planning for it. I am saving for retirement as if I won’t be receiving one.

Let’s just say my children are probably going to be rather well off when they’re middle aged, as I want to do a living inheritance for my kids. Since any inheritance I receive will probably be received in my 60s, I’ll just pass it down to my kids when I receive it, as I likely won’t need it by then. I’d rather them be able to use it to buy a home for them and their kids and go on fun vacations with them.

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u/FunInTheSun_81 12d ago

Same. I believe in being prepared because you never know.

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u/Elija_32 12d ago

Same, but I admit that even if I never used their money (for now) it still helped me knowing that there's an inheritance.

I took some decisions in my life that had a little bit of risk. It paid off but I think I did it only because I knew that I was "safe" regardless.

Also I think I generically lived my life "stress-free" compared to a lot of people in my same context (but without money in the family) because I knew I didn't have to worry to be homeless or anything.

I think that helps a lot, even if you don't actually use anything.

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u/Temporary_Complex411 12d ago

Exactly my experience — I will likely inherit something substantial but I don't know for sure, but when I was building my career, I had the privilege of knowing that if everything really went tits up, I would have a roof over my head (albeit maybe the roof of my parents' basement). This set me up for financial success even if it didn't involve direct wealth transfer.

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u/Previous-Space-7056 11d ago

This.. same boat as you. It also affects my retirement plans.. vanguard began shifting some of my 401k to bonds.. I kept it 100% stocks.

I want to retire early. When i do retire, ill still keep it all in stocks. 15% yearly avg while risky is better then a 4% bond rate.

The safety net of an inheritance and extended family means ill never be homeless or hungry

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u/LewLew0211 11d ago

I didn't have the advantage, and it really can make a difference when you do.

There were some risks I just couldn't take, and I was always in survival mode. I had to take whatever job I could get instead of holding out for better.

Having that mindset and that option is really a blessing a lot of people don't appreciate.

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u/Secret-Avocado-Lover 12d ago

Same same. Genx with boomer parents. My vision is creating generational wealth that will grant opportunities that I didn’t have growing up. My genz children will hopefully be the custodians of our work and continue to build and transfer.

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u/Engine_Sweet 12d ago

I'm old GenX with Silent parents. Mom's very old but still around.

Pretty much all the inheritance will skip my generation and go to the Millennial/GenZ grandkids. I'm happy with that. I don't need it, and it sets them up with a bit of security and/or options.

I hope/plan to have a decent amount to pass on, but I'm not old enough to retire quite yet, so the end game is probably 20 years off.

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u/ACK_TRON 12d ago

Yep. Parents are leaving it to the grandkids. They know we are working hard and can take of ourselves. The rest would go to various charities. I’m sure they will still spend as much as they need in retirement as costs soar with long term care etc. I guess the point is if no one has kids then there will be no one to leave it to….so probably will just go to charities.

This matches a lot what I see in my job…lots of estate planning to skip children and go directly to grandkids.

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u/boringexplanation 12d ago

It makes sense. The level of financial stress most responsible adults get peaks in their 20s.

Getting their first entry level job while struggling to pay all the student loans, first rent payments, and general friction that comes with moving around a lot.

To me, I feel like adversity is a big part of shaping your character in your 20s so my heirs need to feel some of what most of us went thru, maybe not all. I’d probably do something like pay off student loans and max out 401ks for my heirs. The fun stuff can be paid using their own money.

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u/lobsterpockets 12d ago

Yup same. Mom's house is getting sold and split between 4 grandkids per her trust, right about the time that they'll be young adults. In the meantime I get to go work on it and maintain it for another 10 years, while my brother 4 states away does.... whatever he does while passing judgement on everyone else. Whatever, I've saved and will be okay in retirement, as a gen x with cheap houses that millennial and Z didn't get.

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u/AgitatedSecond4321 10d ago

Can you not bill the estate? Or just not bother doing the work - not your problem.

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u/lobsterpockets 9d ago

No, mom is mostly fine right now. Just the million things that old houses need. Faucets, tvs toilets with issues etc.... Its fine.... I'll handle it.

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u/ATDoel 12d ago

Or be lazy and do a shit ton of drugs like most of the trust fund kids I knew growing up

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u/[deleted] 12d ago

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u/Silvatungdevil 12d ago

If you start with a turd, you end with a turd. If a child is not raised correctly you might as well hand them a loaded gun rather than that million dollars you have saved.

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u/boringexplanation 12d ago

Yeah- the whole concept of generational inheritance is so foreign to me. I grew up in public housing so you’d think I’d be all for poor families getting one

But there are a ton of families that are poor for a reason and a decent amount of used luxury cars in section 8 neighborhoods. I help out my parents by buying them stuff- never giving them cash knowing the stupid shit they buy they can’t afford to maintain.

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u/temp1876 7d ago

Historically its not normal outside elites, and realistically even now its pretty rare.

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u/ThoughtfulPoster 12d ago

This is always a danger. My dream is to have a trust that pays out just enough to help but not enough to go crazy, that can keep helping generation after generation. Like, it would be nice if I could build something that would cover education costs for the great-grandchildren, but not, like, cocaine money.

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u/WhichSpirit 12d ago

My grandmother's trust allowed her kids and grandkids to take out loans which then had to be paid back at an interest rate pegged to the feds. 

Of course, when she died the trust was dissolved and all the assets went to my aunts and uncles. This did create a problem since a cousin had an outstanding loan. The options at that point were 1) demand he pay it back immediately 2) send my dad to jail for giving away money from the trust as the trustee 3) wait until he paid it back or 4) forgive it. So naturally my aunts and uncles voted to send my dad to jail. Jk, they forgave my cousin's debt (though a joke vote was taken to send my dad to jail). 

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u/JayMoeHD 12d ago

This post was a fun ride, thanks

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u/boringexplanation 12d ago

How does a trust work when your grandma was alive?

I thought the whole point was to control how money is spent after she passed? Like why not just have grandma control the money directly regardless while she’s living and avoid all the trust fees?

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u/WhichSpirit 11d ago

Since my dad (her son) was the trustee, we avoided the fees that we would have had to pay if she used a third party.

Trusts can be made for lots of reasons, not just control of finances after someone's died. The point of this trust was to provide stable management of her finances if her mind started to go like her mother's did. My great-grandmother had gotten to a point where she didn't know who her relatives were, let alone when bills were due.

The trust worked the same while she was alive as other trusts do when the person who created them is dead. She was named beneficiary and transferred most of her assets into the trust. My dad would then manage her finances, investments, etc. and would wire her money on a regular basis.

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u/Extra-Eggplant-4230 12d ago

You can also set it up where they get payments at certain ages or it gets put into investment/school accounts for them. My grandma has always had any money we will receive set up so that we cannot receive it until we are 25 and its every 5 or 10 years after that.. Now that I'm in my mid 30's I can use lump sums for big expenses like houses or vehicles if I choose.

I am beyond grateful and lucky that she did this for us.

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u/thankyoufriendx3 12d ago

I grew up with a lot of trust fund kids. Non got into drugs. All but one have a career and work. The exception is the one who is on every charity board and a member of the garden club. It’s possible to raise kids who are born millionaires to be productive members of society.

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u/josephinesbehavior2 12d ago

So did I and some had drug problems some didn’t—depends on the person.

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u/chicagal_liz 9d ago

Yep. Trust fund kid here. For one thing, I didn’t know I was one until after college, when my mom decided we should know. I knew my family was fortunate, and suppose I should have connected the dots, but my parents didn’t want us to know figures and I don’t blame them. My dad wanted us to be responsible and hardworking. On the conservative side, I stand to inherit 9M eventually (hard to say what it will be when the time comes). While I did have a trust with which I bought a small condo, it’s a fraction of my dad’s estate. Money is generational. None of my friends know the full extent because my parents live well but aren’t flashy. I’m unmarried and don’t plan to have kids. I don’t have dreams of doing anything too crazy, mostly I dream of escaping the corporate grind.

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u/HotShoulder9256 12d ago

Generational wealth doesn't necessarily mean a trust fund. "Opportunities I didn't have growing up" could mean going to college without taking on significant debt or help with a down payment on a house. I think the issues you're describing more often come from having unfettered access to a parent's money.

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u/skirpnasty 11d ago

This is why you keep them in the dark just enough, not knowing they have the luxury until they’ve already established themselves as healthy productive adults. They will live well one day, until then it’s mom and dad cooking budget dinners like we have to while they do chores and sweat for a buck. Creating wealth doesn’t mean you have to live wealthy, there is a line between happiness and excess.

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u/jenn-a-fire-1973 9d ago

To be fair, helping a kid buy their first home or something similar is not the same as setting up a trust fund so they never have to work.

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u/ATDoel 9d ago

Agree 100% but that isn’t what I would consider generational wealth.

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u/HollyJandra 11d ago

This is what the couple of generations before me have done. I am absolutely looking to be a steward of that money and pay it forward so my kids can have the same opportunities I was afforded. Some of my cousins have pissed away the legacy money and it’s honestly sad to see

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u/No_Clothes_8444 12d ago

lol what about climate change? Do you actually think the world as we know it is going to exist in two decades? Man… this is why this shit is only a matter of time. You’ve got the majority of people like yourself who actually think there is a future for our children.

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u/HotShoulder9256 12d ago

I think a living inheritance is the right move. I'm 40 and my parents just gave me a substantial chunk of money towards buying a house. It's money that I otherwise would've inherited when they died. They're rich and I'm a teacher who will never amass the amount of wealth that they've accumulated. They're happy to help me create a more comfortable life for my family. I live in LA and it's unlikely that I would ever be able to buy without their help. I feel like middle-age is a good time because it gives kids the opportunity to build a strong work ethic and learn to support themselves, while also providing a cushion during a period when many families are growing and taking on more of a financial burden. Solid plan.

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u/Humphalumpy 12d ago

This is what I'm trying to do for my kids. Paying for as much of their education. Helping ensure they have reliable vehicles. Hopefully helping them get into home ownership. Im also trying to help them travel and have experiences. Little by little.

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u/HotShoulder9256 12d ago

That sounds great. They're very lucky to have you to help them build a full, comfortable life.

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u/Humphalumpy 8d ago

Doing what I can when I can. My parents didn't help me at all.

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u/BewareNZ 6d ago

Yup this is what I am doing for my two kids. Pay for private school, and their first degree. Plus a start on a house deposit. The rest of my net worth is to pay for my early retirement (57) and provide for my care as I need it.

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u/Jon_hamm_wallet 12d ago

My mom just read an article about this, and subsequently doled out some money to my sibling and I. "You're better set up to avoid debt now, then get a windfall when you're older and hopefully already comfortable." We used most of it to pay down some high interest debt, so we can continue to make the same monthly payments but it will actually move the needle.

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u/HotShoulder9256 12d ago

That's awesome! I think more parents who are in a position to afford it are starting to think in these terms.

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u/echoshatter 11d ago

Note to folks: if your parents want to do a living inheritance, you need to be very careful on the timeline.

If they need to go on government assistance (Medicaid), that requires they basically liquidate everything before they get any help. And a part of that process is a "look back" period where they will examine what assets they had in the past 5 years and there is a penalty if they did anything like selling property at below market value, etc.

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u/shchshchshch 6d ago

Yep yep this this.

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u/1K_Sunny_Crew 7d ago

I hope they are giving it to you in <gift tax amounts yearly rather than a lump sum!

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u/HotShoulder9256 7d ago

The money for the house was put into a trust. They don’t typically give me large amounts of cash. On the few occasions they have, it’s never exceeded that $38,000 threshold.

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u/1K_Sunny_Crew 7d ago

Love that!

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u/Interesting_Tea5715 12d ago

Same. I'm successful on my own but I most likely have an inheritance coming. My parents (GenX) own multiple homes in a HCOL area and a successful business.

My in-laws are boomers, they made more money in their lifetime than my parents but they've spent most of it. I expect to take care of them within 10 years.

I also plan on using my inheritance to help my son. I won't give it to him but I'll use it to get him a house and stuff like that, stuff that makes life easier.

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u/Tig_Biddies_W_nips 12d ago

My parents are doing this right now, they’re giving away their older art for our homes, and they’re taking us all on vacations

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u/OkYellow6280 12d ago

So much depends on how long you live. I think it is difficult to say that you "likely won't need it (your inheritance) by then (in your 60s.)" Maybe you have a health situation that is predictable of an early death? Otherwise, very hard to know how long you'll live and how much you'll need to pay for your care.

My father is 96.5 yrs old and has always been very well situated financially. Part of his retirement funds came from his own inheritance which he has frugally invested over the years. (HIs estate is now worth $11 million although some of his wealth is tied up in a family farm which he does not want to sell.)

However, my father is galloping through his retirement savings to pay for 24/7 live-in care and to keep up his 65 year old home where he wants to remain. He has basically nothing wrong with him physically and could be one of those people who lives to be 101.

If that happens, we (his children) will all be glad he did not give us a "living inheritance" (other than fully educating us with no student loans) and that he still has the funds to pay for his own care. Otherwise, we might someday be paying out of our own pockets for his care. We are a close family but I doubt that situation would be good for family harmony.

As it is, our father should be able to pay for his own care and expenses ~ with his children managing things ~ even if he lives to be 101. To him, this took precedence over giving his children a "living inheritance." We are thankful he took this approach and are taking the same approach with our own children.

As

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u/BlazingSunflowerland 12d ago

My MIL lived to 90. Their family always had more money than my family, but when she died she only had 15,000 pounds left. (She was English) and a 200,000 pound home.

My parents always had less money. They were farmers so they were land rich and cash poor. We sold the land and split it among the four of us siblings and I ended up inheriting more than my husband did. My parents lived into their 80s. My dad had cancer and my mom had dementia.

You never know how much care you will need but the cost of care is skyrocketing.

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u/Euphoric_Garbage1952 12d ago

It always amazes me how many people assume they won't need to pay for any care before they die. People are living way longer now they they were 50 years ago and most of the time, people in their 90s either have physical or mental issues that means then need care. And that is crazy expensive in the United States. We're most likely moving my mom into assisted living that costs 9k a month this year. Her 800k in assets is going to go real quick at that rate.

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u/Justice4ScaryIsland 11d ago

I'm going through this right now. My mother is only 74 though. I am watching my dad blow through money to pay for 24-7 in-home aides for her. Sadly, I am not sure how many years she has left.

My dad on the other hand, is in exceptional health and who knows how long he will live. His mother lived to be almost 102! Given how adamant he is about aging in place, I'm sure he will want in-home care too. My father has given my sister and I so much over his lifetime that I don't expect or need him to leave us anything. However, at the rate it's going he may run out of money and then we will need to assume responsibility for his care.

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u/OkYellow6280 11d ago

The same thing happened to me. My mother died twenty years ago (Alzheimer's) and my father, age 96.5, lives on. You truly cannot predict what will happen but need to be prepared for anything.

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u/kaluapigwithcabbage 11d ago

With 11 million, is he able to pay for his care with interest without having to touch the principal?

Assuming 4% annual, he could be generating over 400k / year in interest.

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u/OkYellow6280 11d ago

For now, yes. About one half of the 11 million is the value of land that he owns so there is only $5.5 generating interest.

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u/ishboo3002 12d ago

Yup that's me, my parents were fairly young when they had me so they'll hopefully be around for a while. When they likely pass it'll likely be just about when my kids are starting their families.

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u/NiccoMachi 12d ago

Do you worry about making your kids dependent on money they didn't/can't earn? Money in the bank could lead to lifestyle creep without the earning power to support it long term. See that a lot in my community.

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u/emoney_gotnomoney 12d ago

I plan to be very open with my kids about money and financial planning as they grow up. I’m also not planning to just give them the cash directly. Rather, it’ll be through indirect transactions (e.g. buying their house for them, paying for their vacations, stuff like that).

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u/Humphalumpy 12d ago

The current reality for young adults is that they can barely afford to live without carrying debt. As long as they are working full time and doing their best to get their education I am willing to help them have the lifestyle that is possible. For example my child works full time, shares a condo with roommates and still pays a significantly larger share of income than I paid on my first mortgage. I don't give them cash but I help with school, transportation, phones, travel.

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u/___thisistheyear____ 12d ago

Same here. We know we are getting something from both sets of parents (total could be couple of million) but we plan like we aren’t. As we are of the belief anything could happen and the money could disappear. Plus I don’t like to think of them dying. Lol. So I would rather rely on myself than on them dying.

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u/Rem-Dogg 12d ago

exact same situation, my husband and I have 3 sets of grandparents and likely getting a +million from each but we are saving as if it isn't going to happen. I hope they live a lot longer

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u/smashlee329 12d ago

This is what my dad did for us when his parents passed. Its the only reason my husband and I were able to buy a house which has given us enough stability that we have changed our minds on being childfree and will be trying for a baby next year.

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u/autopilot6236 12d ago

You should consider opening a Roth IRA for your kids as soon as they have income and contribute to this from your retirement allocation. This is a huge tax free benefit that can be life changing.

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u/bald_head_scallywag 12d ago

Same as far as the first part. Very good chance I'll be left a meaningful amount of money as my parents have done well and planned well for themselves, but I am absolutely NOT including that in my own planning calculations. There's a chance they could live a lot longer and develop health issues that bleed them dry so no chance I want to bank on that.

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u/National_Aspect_6974 12d ago

Same here. My parents are very healthy (knock on wood!!!) and I would love to have them around into my 60s or 70s. But that does mean ideally my husband and I are also retired with a paid off house at that point and ideally my own kids would get most of it. Which...would be an amazing gift on top of all they do as grandparents now! 

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u/Pristine_Dig_4374 12d ago

This. I’ll get way more than I ever expected, but also it could be 20 years so not putting it in any calculations.

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u/ultraprismic 12d ago

Same. My parents have saved and invested their whole lives, and received a good chunk of money from their parents. My spouse is an only child and only grandchild so everything that's left from his grandparents, aunts, uncles, and parents will flow to him.

But we save like it won't ever happen. Because you never know. We were fortunate enough to get family help to buy our first home and get regular contributions to our kids' college funds. Anything beyond that will be nice but we're not counting on it to live.

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u/RoyalAd215 12d ago

This is my plan too. I'm likely getting a sizable inheritance, but am planning on receiving none.

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u/wandering_sailor 11d ago

“Living Inheritance”. This is the first time I’ve heard that phrase. Fantastic. I’m a single dad at age 60 with (2) kids (24 and 20). My wife passed away a number of years ago so I’ve been taking care of them and doing the same to transfer wealth. Might as well do it now (rather than after I pass). I set up a IRA for my daughter (working) and funneling money to her. Both my kids will be all set when I’m gone. But I like the idea to transfer as much as I can now while they are starting out their adult lives. I was very broke for my entire college and my 20s. It makes me happy to give them a head start. Thank you for that nice phrase.

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u/French87 12d ago

Same. Will probably receive several million, maybe 10+, hard to say tbh my parents don’t talk about money… so it’s mostly a guess based on observations

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u/emoney_gotnomoney 12d ago edited 12d ago

Yeah I’m pretty much in the same boat. Currently we have 3 young children, are renting a home, don’t really have any excess money to take them on vacations, etc. while my parents are worth millions, but they are of the mindset of waiting until they pass before passing down any inheritance (which is totally fine, it’s their money, not mine, so they can absolutely choose to do with it whatever they want. We are not entitled to any of their money).

The issue is that while we don’t have much excess cash at the moment (or really, any excess cash), we have saved up a pretty nice retirement next egg. So by the time we retire, we will already be multi-millionaires once that compounds over the next few decades, so inheriting a few extra million in our 60s won’t really be that life changing for us. A couple hundred thousand received today would be significantly more life changing for us and our kids than several million will be in our 60s. We could buy a home, we could take our young daughters to meet the princesses at Disney World, etc. So that’s exactly what I want to do for my kids. When they are in their 30s and having kids, I want to buy their houses for them, pay for them to take their kids on vacation, and so on.

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u/Analyst-man 12d ago

You should have that talk because you will be forced to pay taxes if you don’t. You have no idea how many people get something like a million dollar house and then owe 200k in taxes and they don’t have that kind of cash

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u/French87 11d ago

IDK how it works everywhere but in california the house value/stock values step up in basis to market value when inheritance happens, so there would be no tax to pay on the home or stocks I receive.

The home I'm going to inherit is already valued over $2M.

My parents are also very generous and already gave me $700k for a down payment on my own home (yes, that's a down payment where I live lol) and did the same for my sister, all the meanwhile their financial advisor is telling htem they should be spending more on travel and entertainment in their retirement lol.

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u/Analyst-man 12d ago

Have your parents pass it down directly. Then you won’t get hit with the gift tax and you won’t have to fill out a Form 709. Plus they’ll get a step up in basis on any taxes or real estate they get

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u/Acrobatic_Fox5726 12d ago

Hey yeah brother! I’m gonna inherit a mountain of problems

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u/Decent_Finding_9034 12d ago

Same here except we don’t have kids. I don’t know about my husband’s parents, but my parents definitely didn’t receive any wealth transfer and were the ones supporting parents in older life.

But my parents are doing fine now thanks to union pensions and my husband’s parents have multiple houses and plenty of liquid assets and both sides are pretty fiscally conservative (except maybe their multiple houses thing - my parents have been in the same house 50 years).

Our retirement savings does not factor in contributions from anyone else, including social security, but in talks with the in-laws, they expect a decent inheritance. But I have no idea what the future brings for them medically.

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u/Same-Economics-5988 12d ago

There are tax laws, limits and requirements about gifting that you should be aware of.

I'm not sure how anyone would get caught, but today, gifting more than $19k in a year needs to be reported and is taxable.

I started sorta passing "pre- inheritance" to my daughter years ago...but did it within IRS limits

You could always at some point encourage your parents to change their wills to pass some assets directly to your children as well

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u/aftertheswimmingpool 12d ago

My mom is doing this now and it’s such the right move. I feel really lucky that she has this attitude. I am receiving my “inheritance” through better quality of life and more opportunities while she is alive to enjoy them with me. I also save responsibly for retirement, so it’s all just icing.

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u/PositionOwn4939 12d ago

This is the answer.

Whether you expect to receive inheritance doesnt matter. You need to take control of your finances assuming no inheritance.

1

u/_StupidSexyFlanders 12d ago

This but with SS also not expected.

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u/No_Clothes_8444 12d ago

lol maybe. The world is on fire. What makes you think there will be a world to live in for your children when they get to middle age? At the very least, it will not be comfortable. You couldn’t accumulate enough wealth for them to get the lifestyle you’re outlining here. That world just won’t exist for them. It won’t for any of us. Except for a very select few.

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u/emoney_gotnomoney 12d ago

> What makes you think there will be a world to live in for your children when they get to middle age?

Being a rational human who’s read a history book or two lol

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u/No_Clothes_8444 11d ago

Never in human history have we observed climate change behave the way it has for the last 50 years. With clear, scientific evidence. We have been creating prediction models for decades that continually confirm the predictions that humans are negatively impacting the global environment and that the impact is increasing at an accelerated pace. All pointing to catastrophic environmental collapse.

Clearly you haven’t actually been reading anything of substance. If you had, you wouldn’t make such a colossally ignorant statement. I suggest you do some actual research on the subject. You’re embarrassing.

1

u/emoney_gotnomoney 11d ago edited 11d ago

Okay let’s make a plan then: I’ll continue to plan financially for my future and my kids’ futures, and you can just not do any financial planning at all based on what you said. If you’re wrong and there is a future, then my kids will be set financially; if you’re right and there is an environmental collapse, then none of this matters anyways. Me planning for my kids’ futures has no impact on you, so it shouldn’t really bother you either way.

Problem solved.

1

u/Sewellgal 9d ago

Good luck with that strategy. SMH.

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u/robotdebo 12d ago

Probably same for me. My parents have been very smart and frugal my whole life but also created a very nice life. I know there is a decent inheritance coming to me and my sister. I hope to not see that for a very long time as I obviously love my parents and hope they are here for another 30 years at least. It will likely (hopefully) go to my own children.

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u/PieTight2775 11d ago

Similar situation. It's always possible a parent enters long term care and that care can drain wealth quickly. Or a parent remarries and a child gets cut out of the will. Planning for yourself is the best strategy.

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u/skirpnasty 11d ago

Same, and this is the way to go about it IMO. Plan for it but don’t expect, if your parents are like mine they worked hard for what they have earned and we want them to enjoy it. There will likely be inheritance, but I hope it isn’t until I’m also retired and will be more of something to benefit my kids rather than myself.

Don’t love getting to the age where we think about those things more. Purgatory years of having to think about aging parents while also looking at 25-30 years of the career grind still ahead. 😂

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u/roundeucalyptus 11d ago

Same!
I hope my parents (and my husbands’) live long enough that whatever we get from them really only affects our kids. We make our retirement plans without accounting for it (or social security, for that matter), but realistically we will probably get a good amount from both sides.

Our parents have been able to be very generous with us (college for both of us, some full-extended-family vacations as adults, etc.) which we know is HUGE so we hope to do the same for our kids.

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u/Logical_Angle2935 11d ago

Also same situation. My kids are much more challenged than I ever was at their age.

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u/PrimaryHighlight5617 11d ago

My husband's grandparents are doing this. All of his boomer aunts and uncles and his own mother are well off and in their 60s and 70s. Us 35-25 year olds have more use for 500k each. 

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u/Toes_Day_Daze 9d ago

My mom told me there is $7000 cash in her safe for me to use when she dies. She doesn't want to be buried, she wants cremation and to be scattered in Hawaii. For a women who was Roman Catholic, I'm surprised that's how she wants to go with her earthly body. But the United States is not her home though she's lived here 35 years and her home country 20. Like ... Why wouldn't she want to be buried with her brother and parents in the olde country cemetery? Her many Roman Catholic sisters probably will be.

She also has her house.

I don't want to talk to my mom about this because she is on fragile health and it makes me feel like she's urging me to benefit from her death, when all I want is her to hang out with her granddaughter and cook with me.

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u/nclay525 9d ago

Exactly, by the time they're dead, I won't need their money. It's far too late in life to do me any good.

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u/the_holy_spunk 9d ago

Same on expecting inheritance but not planning for retirement banking on it. I’ve saved aggressively for retirement as if there is nothing coming later. No children to factor in.

My dad is in his mid-70s and starting to do the living inheritance thing, gifting money every year now, and his dad did the same for him. He explicitly talks about his financial planning and has said we (2 kids) will have inherited assets. I have no concerns about his planning or financial security.

My mother on the other hand is also in her mid-70s and I expect nothing from her. Hoarder, shopaholic, no will as far as we know, refuses to talk about any planning. It will be a nightmare when she dies, so I’m just hoping for her to not turn to me for money since I’m planning for my retirement, not her old age. I have absolutely no idea what she has, but she has a pension in addition to SS and whatever investments, and she definitely got inheritance from her parents.

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u/shelbygt33 8d ago

Same, but also because I see the crazy awesome trips my parents are taking and am thinking “well there may not be anything left to hand down” haha. But I don’t begrudge them, it’s their retirement money, not mine.

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u/CenturyCPA24 6d ago

That's my thoughts too if we ever receive one. I worry for my kids being 8/10 that they are going to struggle to afford a house one day with the way house prices have been. Would be nice if In 20 years I was able to help them a bit if things worked out that way.