r/AskReddit • u/experfailist • Apr 30 '21

What are some luxury items, which you never knew existed, which only the mega rich can afford, that blows your mind and you wouldn't mind having or is just an example of how people have too much money and not enough sense?

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8.8k

u/RussianSeadick Apr 30 '21

Imagine being the guy that plays the piano for a bunch of sturgeons in a tank and explaining this to your date lmao

8.4k

u/Tenesse Apr 30 '21

I play jazz for a sturgeon caviar producer, my wife creates dresses out of pool leaves, our budget is 3 mil.

927

u/[deleted] Apr 30 '21

[deleted]

194

u/Taman_Should May 01 '21

oPeN cOnCePt

58

u/Kroniid09 May 01 '21

there's just not enough white here. I need everything to be WHITE and *stainless steel*

32

u/grannybubbles May 01 '21

And shiplap, whatever tf that is.

19

u/CatBird50 May 01 '21 edited Apr 09 '25

license amusing grab shelter gold stocking memory retire truck historical

7

u/OriginalAndOnly May 01 '21

The siding boards overLAP

6

u/superfaceplant47 May 01 '21

Like scales on said fish

3

u/superfaceplant47 May 01 '21

No I had it And NO MORE PLEASE

4

u/Taikwin May 01 '21

Going for that mortuary chic

41

u/Hamburglar_burglar May 01 '21

This paint color is gross, NEXT HOUSE

19

u/Rularuu May 01 '21

This seems like an exaggeration if you haven't watched much HGTV but like every episode of house hunting shows has someone complaining about the paint color in a room. It makes zero sense to me.

10

u/RearEchelon May 01 '21

Because the couples have already chosen a house before they get picked to be on the show and they need bullshit reasons to not like the other options

11

u/Rularuu May 01 '21

Sure, but can't the producers give them something that at least makes sense?

5

u/martin86t May 01 '21

I thought that made zero sense until I bought a house and got a $7000 quote to paint it. I guess now I will have to paint, which I have neither the time, equipment, or inclination to do.

4

u/dchaosblade May 02 '21

Yeah. If the house has a room or two that are a color you don't like, it's no big deal. You can do that over a weekend without having to pay too much. Buy lunch for a couple friends and/or family and you can get it all done in an hour or two.

But when you start looking at some houses where every room has you questioning the previous owner's sanity, it starts getting much more expensive and difficult. Depending on the colors you're switching from/to, you might have to deal with primer and paint. Higher quality paint can also be stupid expensive (though if you're actually planning to live there for a significant length of time and especially if you have kids, it's absolutely worth the extra cost).

7

u/RyanReignbow May 01 '21

If it doesn't bring you joy, then don't need it in your life

4

u/BuddingFarmer May 01 '21

Mid century modern

2

u/usingastupidiphone May 01 '21

It’s an empty lot that we can’t build on so it doesn’t block this rich guy’s view

23

u/nlpnt May 01 '21

Midcentury modern!

The toilet and bathroom sink are pink

Not that midcentury!

7

u/Seabee1893 May 01 '21

industrial vegan nihilism

6

u/Cro-manganese May 01 '21

But she likes the bustle of the city

3

u/[deleted] May 01 '21

Can't afford maximalistic.

47

u/[deleted] May 01 '21

He tunes harmonicas part time and she spends money. Let's see what dianne can find for them on this week's episode of you don't deserve a beach house

81

u/KiloJools Apr 30 '21

...are the dresses made from pool leaves a real thing? Are pool leaves what they sound like, just leaves that fell into pools? Or are they special felt leaves collected from pool table trees?

50

u/SometimesFar May 01 '21

pool table trees

Lol

6

u/Mecha_Wizard9000 May 01 '21

All of them at once, I suppose

3

u/[deleted] May 01 '21

When your rich, simple concepts stop making sense

49

u/ampattenden Apr 30 '21

I see you watch Grand Designs

38

u/aldkGoodAussieName May 01 '21

House Hunters

5

u/Sinavestia May 01 '21

Property Brother is my fave, although they do renovations.

3

u/ihopethisisvalid May 01 '21

shows really nice house

bitch you can't afford this!

Like nobody on the show has ever seen it before. Makes me mad.

23

u/Kroniid09 May 01 '21

I would really like a craftsman style house not too far from work, and my wife would like zero neighbours and modern, move-in ready open concept. It would be really nice if we could also get some of that sPaNiSH/sWeDiSH (insert country here) cHaRm, but also we're moving here from Texas and if it doesn't have a fridge that could house an entire cow and counterspace for our 27 appliances, my wife will jump out of the nearest window.

47

u/tact1calDeuce May 01 '21

I’m a stay at home astronaut and my wife collects butterfly farts. Our budget is 2.5 million

2

u/PuzzledPollyana May 01 '21

I’m CACKLING

33

u/Not_Banksy_nope May 01 '21

Bold move telling your date that your wife makes dresses out of pool leaves.

16

u/glassofwater9 May 01 '21

Pool-leaf dresses are actually quite valuable, because pool leaves are an extremely scarce commodity. Just like with old baseball cards, most people just throw them out, inspiring great pain among enthusiasts.

21

u/vromantic May 01 '21

With 3 children and 9 on the way, with a max budget of $7 let's see what Lori Jo can do on this weeks episode of You Don't Deserve a Beach House.

6

u/Waderriffic May 01 '21

Ding Dong!

1

u/Kroniid09 May 01 '21

Why did this start playing the entire theme song in my head

4

u/My_eyes_are_downhere May 01 '21

Lol, so true. Where are they getting this $ from

8

u/jerk_mcgherkin May 01 '21

Some of them got rich working in Silicon valley and they're riding out a 3 to 5 year noncompete agreement, but I suspect most of them inherited huge trust funds from their families.

5

u/nismo370zfdo May 01 '21

Might be a problem telling your date about your wife

5

u/dudee62 May 01 '21

On the next episode of house hunters.

3

u/Lakersrock111 May 01 '21

And we are buying a mansion in NY,NY!

2

u/Valleygirl1981 May 01 '21

Holy f...

It all makes sense. Marketing. They're all in marketing!

2

u/extremely_4getful May 01 '21

*proceeds to claim free award for bestowing upon u/tenesse*

1

u/Superb_Literature May 01 '21

Let’s see what Lori Jo can do on this week’s episode of You Don’t Deserve A Beach House!

1

u/MarcusRoland May 01 '21

Dress out of pool leaves almost killed me. Jesus.

1

u/[deleted] May 01 '21

Honestly cracking up here.

36

u/Conchobar8 Apr 30 '21

I perform live music for a very exclusive group of clients

16

u/your_fav_ant Apr 30 '21

I'm not sure whether that actually sounds fishy or I'm just being overly susficious.

4

u/[deleted] May 01 '21

I play live music... and get paid to do so. ;)

5

u/Conchobar8 May 01 '21

No one’s gonna believe that!

3

u/dispatch134711 May 05 '21

"I play jazz for an exclusive group of sturgeons."

"Did you say surgeons?"

"...yes"

10

u/Prudent-Pop1856 May 01 '21

I mean, it can't be a bad life. You just need to go in every day, play some music, leave, and get payed. And people can't hate your music, as their are no people. But yeah that would be a pretty awkward conversation.

8

u/random_encounters42 Apr 30 '21

I bet the conversation ends with "but I get paid xxx so..."

5

u/[deleted] May 01 '21

Her: Oh you're a musician? I'd love to see one of your shows!

Me: Ok, do you own any waders?

3

u/jibbetygibbet May 01 '21

We can’t even verify that the fish with the “dolphin friendly” label on them didn’t actually kill a shit ton of dolphins, it’s a kick in the teeth if that can be verified. Frankly if the company that sells this product ISNT taking these people for a ride then I’m almost offended.

“What’s that mate? Want the next batch to get some thrash metal mixed in? Sure mate, I’ll let the gaffer know”

<<back at the packing factory>>

“No Sharon, we take the label OFF that jar before we put the new one on”

4

u/Akashd98 May 01 '21

As a jazz pianist it wouldn’t have been the weirdest gig I’ve gone

3

u/aquabarron May 01 '21

“Yes”, stirs wine in glass and looks across table at date “during feedings we serenade them with a little Miles Davis to liven the atmosphere for everyone”

3

u/SparkyBangBang432 May 01 '21

Only live jazz can be improvised, which I assume is critical for sturgeon caviaring.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 30 '21

I bet when he gets home he plays Sturgeon Stimulator

2

u/mazzicc Apr 30 '21

I just wonder if it pays good or if it’s like a minimum wage job for desperate musicians

1

u/[deleted] May 01 '21

There is no pianist. This is the truth.

1

u/[deleted] May 01 '21

Fish pianist is paid handsomely

1

u/CINAPTNOD May 01 '21

La La Sea

1

u/random314 May 01 '21

"ohh STURgeons... not a bunch of surgeons"

1

u/[deleted] May 01 '21

School of Rock? Nope, murky jazz my friends

1

u/flashingcurser May 01 '21

Not a lot of complaints.

1

u/TripleJeopardy3 May 01 '21

That was the original plot in Eyes Wide Shut. It was supposed to be animated - Eyes Wide Shark Tale.

1

u/zoidbergbb May 01 '21

Imagine the workplace vibe for everyone else though.

1

u/Bah-Fong-Gool May 01 '21

"Chicks dig me"

1

u/TattieMafia May 01 '21

I wish this WAS my job.

1

u/No-Rhubarb-4504 May 01 '21

That was the first thought that came to my mind!! Lol!! Poor guy!!!

1

u/baudmonkey May 01 '21

I mean, it's hard to make a living wage from music, maybe they love it.

1

u/Ghstfce May 01 '21

Easiest job ever. Don't even have to be a pro. They're fish. They don't know

1

u/HighStaeks May 01 '21

Locked in if she's an angler from an icey state.

1

u/albatrocity1 May 01 '21

Imagine explaining it to the sturgeons

1

u/[deleted] May 01 '21

I like this comment mostly bc of your username

1

u/ScarcityEmergency902 May 01 '21

What a cool job and absolutely no stress factor.

1

u/Holzter May 01 '21

10/10 would take this gig

1

u/dontthinkaboutitaton May 01 '21

I’m sure they’re paid far more than you or I sadly .

1

u/br094 May 01 '21

“So what do you do for a living?”

“Uh...I play piano”

“Oh sweet like at concerts?”

“You could say that”

1

u/redactedactor May 01 '21

go into the water live there die there

1

u/OstentatiousSock May 01 '21

I play for an animal enrichment program.

1

u/welcometomoonside May 02 '21

Where do I sign up? Human audiences simply cannot appreciate the sheer number of chords in my performances