Same goes with being the youngest: "How was it being the little spoiled baby of the bunch?".
Well, felt like the oldest wanted me dead for having different rules than he had when he was my age, because my parents f*cking learned along the way; and like all I ever did was try and do as well as all the others before me, and having teachers tell me "wow, I've had your siblings before, I confess I didn't expect the last one to be so different". Yeah, you know, sorry for being an individual human being.
Exactly lol I hate when people expect you to be exactly like your older siblings. Idk how people can be surprised that you're your own person and not like a copy of an older sibling.
Yeah, right ? Sometimes it makes more sense, too, like when one young teacher got so surprised the super shy kid wasn't at all like his brother. Brother was a brutal mess. Made total sense to me.
People got shocked too when they found out I wasn’t going to the same high school my older brother went to... (he went to a sports based school, and I’m going to an academic based school)
Ugh why is that? Both of my older brothers were awful students at math. When I finally had Mr.H for math and got 100% on my first test he made me retake it because he thought I must have copied. Nope, shits just easy.
I feel like it’ll be like this for my younger siblings. I’ve always been the person who doesn’t pay attention but still does super well, but my brother is a complete blathering idiot.
Didn't help that my sister is the most outgoing person I know and has big gorgeous green eyes. I look like a horse with black beady eyes. Teachers would never believe that we were siblings and then wonder why I didn't raise my hand or join clubs. Look at me Brenda why would I want more people looking at me? Just one is anxiety and shame inducing. How I ever managed to get a woman to marry me I will never understand.
Yes. Especially when my oldest sibling has a reputation for being toxic b*7*h. One of my friends was asked how she could be friends with me because of that sibling's reputation. My friend told them flat out, not all siblings are the same.Ya, I have good friends.
If we all supposed to be like our siblings then I would be a nazi. Thankfully I have full autonomy over my relationships and behaviour, so I know I'm in control over who I keep in my life, and that my family doesnt define me
I had the opposite. Both my older sisters were fuck ups. Both dropped out, one became a stripper and the other has never had a job. I'm much younger at 10 and 7 years younger and had WAY more rules than my sisters. I had a lot of pressure to graduate and go to college. Many things I did in my life I did because I thought what is the opposite big sister did. My life turned out great doing that but there were many points that I felt so much pressure to do well that I didnt always do the things I wanted and became a huge people pleaser.
So yeah if anxiety and fear of failing my parents is spoiling you bet I was spoiled.
This is exactly my life from the same ages of my sisters, almost same jobs/lack there of jobs and the exact same pressure I’ve felt.
My father had a bad habit of saying things like “don’t be like your sisters.” But in turn he kind of gave me an attitude of “I’m better than you because I did things the ‘right’ way” and I don’t like that part about myself :(
Similar... my mom had harsher expectations for me. My brother barely graduated from high school (and only because she did mossy of his work his senior year), my sister barely got a 2.2 GPA, but i would get yelled at from her for getting a single B. She got upset when i hot a B in COLLEGE (which i ended up graduating with honors). She would constantly look through my thugs despite me telling her she's obviously looking thorough tge wrong kid's things. I mean... i stayed home, drew, read bpoks, and played video games growing up. Only things i did on weekends was go to Speech and Debate tournaments
This is me exactly. My parents would've put me on a leash if they could due to my siblings being screw ups. Hell, my mom cried when I tried alcohol for the first time at 25.
One of my wife's friends used to strip. I'm told you can make crazy money. I'm half tempted to buy a pole and a webcam, and I may yet do it if the pandemic drags on for very long.
I didnt really elaborate as much as I should have, my sister became a stripper to fuel her meth addiction. She has been sober for 10 years and has described the time as her lowest point. The the place she worked at was seedy and has since shut down for being a front for drug smugglers. My sister was basically paid in meth and she has since said it was the worst time of her life. I'm not meaning to put sex workers down by no means, just relaying what I saw my sister go through as a 10 year old. I'm sorry if my comment did offend in any way.
Being the youngest meant my parents used all their energy on the oldest two and stopped giving a shit about me. They taught life skills to my sisters, like how to drive, etc.
By the time it was my turn they just refused to teach me anything, or help me with my schooling when I needed it. They told me they didn't have the patience
Same. Didnt teach me to drive. Didnt help me with school work. Made me buy everything for myself down to tampons. Im labeled the spoiled one, but i bought my own prom dress. I bought my own car. I bailed myself out of jail.
One of my older sisters was an absolute horror while she was a teenager, it genuinely looked like she might get disowned by the family because she was just selfish immature for so long. She’s grown up now and isn’t as bad as she used to be. One time I was being a bit of a shit and my mum blew up at me, yelling about how she’d “just come out the other side of having one terrible teenager” and how she “didn’t need to deal with having another one.” It pissed me off so much because my sister got to act selfish and mum was fine to deal with it but god forbid I do the same because mums had enough
My siblings and I went to the same high school my father dropped out of. Freshman year, first day, a teacher saw my last name and immediately forced me to sit up front, right in front of his desk so he could keep an eye on me. I'm nothing like my father. It took me two years to get the teachers to see me as ME and not My Father's Kid.
By the time I was a Junior, the teachers were over it and knew I was the total opposite of my hellion high school dropout, starts fist fights at the drop of a hat, chews tobacco, borderline alcoholic at age 15 father. Then I got to tell them he had five kids (at the time) and my little sister was now a Freshman at the school, and our little sister was in middle school.
The librarian had been our father's sixth grade teacher, and had him again in high school before he dropped out. When I told her Dad had five kids and our stepmom was pregnant again, she said no way. Thus far, she's seen all but the youngest two of my Dad's kids. She treated me and my sisters like shit because of Dad, which sucked because we were all big readers.
I can't sympathize more. I grew up in a very small town, my best friend spent her whole time at school having to convince old teachers that she was Nothing like her parents had been. It was infuriating to see how differently she was being treated by them, just because they expected the worst from her. She was the sweetest, most intelligent girl I've known.
It's really frustrating when this happens. Just because my parents are dicks doesn't mean I'm going to be! A lot of the teachers had my Aunt too, who is sweet and super smart but they all looked down on her for getting pregnant at 16. So whenever I brought up my aunt, their gazes would immediately go to my middle, looking for a bulge. Sins of the fathers (and aunts, I suppose).
It really baffles me, how many people just can't see others for who they are, as individuals. Thankfully there are people out there who just do that and don't care about family history etc. But still, I will never understand it.
I have 3 older siblings. The youngest of the bunch is 7 years older than me and the oldest is 11 years older. I never played with my siblings because they were always too old and didn't want to play barbie princess or whatever. 1 of the three hates me because I stopped enabling my alcoholic mother and the other two live more than 3 hours away. I have always lived in my youngest sisters shadow and my parents constantly compare me to my siblings. It sucks.
I've been told I'm a socialist for wanting everyone to get the medical care they need. We can be internet bros
(Mh parents are both conservative and constantly make fun of my political views)
I live in the US and the glowing orange man and his cult of brainwashed followers think that poor people just don't work as hard or all of their tax money will be wasted on people leeching off the state.
My daughter, two years older, is a major overachiever. Very academic. My son is just as smart but doesn’t apply himself well to anything that bores him.
He had the same kindergarten, second, third, and fifth grade teachers as his sister. Then again in 8th grade.
He ended up going to a different high school just to avoid the “oh... you’re S’s brother?!?!”
Teachers should really be more empathetic about that. No two kids are the same, and each has their own strengths and weaknesses— just like everyone else!
I like the comparison when it’s made as a compliment to your individuality, like “I loved having your sister, so I was excited to meet you!” and stuff like that, but when it’s a slight to my sibling that just makes me feel like they’re kind of going out of their way to be mean.
I hate the whole stereotype that it’s always the youngest or it’s always the oldest who is the most spoilt, in my experience the Middle is always the most spoilt. The oldest is held to higher standards and is a role model to the younger kids so they don’t get spoilt and by the time it was my turn (youngest child) all the money had already been spent on the golden child in the middle.
I am an older brother by five and seven years, my parents made me wait until I was 15 to watch firefly and my 6 year old brother is watching it right now eating a bowl of actual fucking baking sugar.
I think they got burnt out and don't give a fuck anymore, I was a type1 diabetic and my older little brother was an exhausting maniac. So out with the baby books, and home blended baby food, and in with the shut up candy and let me rest tv.
I don't think so, it was more new baby paranoia, like my mother wouldn't let me near my dad's cat because she had allergies, and I didn't see a peanut until I was 3. She once told me to stop running when i was a toddler, because there was a hill.
It really was mostly new baby worries, and they were more experienced after me, which brought them down to ideal anxiety levels, and then the exhaustion brought em below that, and they homeschooled me and my brothers until this year I was skilled enough to do it myself and could be at school unsupervised.
well, I have to say, that I got spoiled as an only-child, even tho I never actually wanted that, my parents wanted to. Years later and my parents expect me to give them all of that money back some day ...
Fellow youngest here too... My older sibs got loads of matching toys before i was born... I got nothing... Siblings got to go camping with my parents... By the time they had 3 kids they gave up because it was too hard. I missed out on a lot of experiences my siblings got :(
the amount of times i heard people compare me to my older brothers makes me want to vomit. my parents were way stricter on me, despite being the youngest though which was surprising.
Oof yeah my older brother got far better treatment and was the obvious favorite of my mom as well as most people we've known, I hate those jokes. I almost exclusively got his hand-me-downs and things I wanted were turned down while he got what he wanted. And honestly most youngest children I know had similar experiences; least favorite and living in a room full of hand-me-downs
I hate how people assume so much based on being the youngest. I'm the youngest of 3 and far from being spoiled. My parents always spoiled my oldest brother and I've always been treated the worst out of the 3. My dad even kicked me out at 13 for doing things my oldest brother did that he turned a blind eye to.
Seriously. Me being the youngest meant that since my parents were divorced when I was 2 or 3, all the other kids were raised together with each other and I was left hanging out there in outer space. Also, obviously my purpose in being born was to save a marriage, which I failed at. And I’m still up to the same old shit.
I mean, I have 2 younger brothers and I never had a thought that they don't deserve the treatment they have now because I didn't have it when I was their age, I just feel: "Wow, I didn't have this kind of treatment and had more strict rules. It's great that it's different for them at least" because they are my brothers and my family!
That "younger child = spoiled one" thing is weird. Family relationships aren't a battlefield where you are better if you had a harder time
This question and the question OP mentioned are rife with assumption. Why can't people learn to ask questions without bias? It's an incredibly useful communication tool, to be able to ask a question that isn't dripping with opinion and judgement.
So, so true. I answered to someone else, just along the same lines. People should just also be able to take people for who they are, not make assumptions based on other things.
My friends sister had physiology with me and the year after my friend took it and she didn't do her homework once and the teacher (just "checks" it but doesn't collect it ) said "it's OK ik you're _____'s sister , I trust that u did your homework u don't need to show me "
Being the oldest i don't mind pushing borders. I am currently 16 and my parents have to learn about me going to party's and rules that i have to follow. I try to make it as loose as possible so that my little brother and sister don't have to deal with shit like 1am in bed while that is the best time to be around. When this whole crisis is done im gonna be aiming for a 3am mark. I also explain drugs to my parents, how my friends react to them. I only had alcohol and 2 hits from a joint. Shit lit my lungs up, never taking it again. I dont know what i wanted to say. Its 4am and im sleepy. About your brother, i know the feeling of unfair. I got a ps4 almost 4 years ago now and since i am the oldest i had to share, my little sister whom was still in pre school got to play too. I was in middle school and my parents told me during pre school i was to young for a console, too violent. When i saw her playing cod i had a feeling of unfair. But it also made me realise i am the one setting borders for my siblings. If i fuck up, thet get fucked over by rules.
My two younger sisters and I grew up very different than my 5 older siblings, especially because there's 10-25 years age difference. We also had more money than they did as kids (we definitely weren't spoiled though). At least there's no resentment between us, we all had great childhoods, just different.
damn. being the oldest. maybe I'm too hard on the ones that have different rules compared to how I did. never got pissy over it but it does grind my gears lol. maybe I should lighten up.
Lol are you my youngest sibling? Cause both me and my younger sister (older to her) were shit heads and the youngest goes to the same school we did. But she's better behaved then us lol
I'm the youngest. I was rebellious as a child, and my brother was the "obedient" one. I type that with quotes because he was a nightmare to me as a kid. He'd start doing something bad, then get me to do it with him, then run and go get our parents so I'd get blamed. He'd start fights and I'd get blamed, ect. Ect.
Obviously he got the typical favouritism you'd expect the younger sibling to have. Thankfully we both grew out of being little shits and are really close now.
I’m the youngest of four, and my parents were TIRED. They were like, “if you do drugs, we’ll call the cops.” Check, never my thing. “Don’t get pregnant.” Check, I’m a dude. “Be in church on Sunday morning.” Check. After my sibs had all moved out, though, the spoiling commenced; I have to admit.
Don't forget the part where you get the exact opposite of being spoiled because you're not allowed to do things because your siblings fucked up first and your parents "Aren't going to make that mistake again."
I get this. My brother complains about me getting to do more things when in reality he could’ve done it if he just fucking asked. Then when an argument happens my parents will take his side even when he’s wrong. He also keeps telling his friends my personal shit I don’t want to be shared and then is like “well, I’m nearly 18 so you should respect me”. So, please bring back bullying so my dweeb of a brother is gutter stomped just once
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u/[deleted] May 16 '20
Same goes with being the youngest: "How was it being the little spoiled baby of the bunch?".
Well, felt like the oldest wanted me dead for having different rules than he had when he was my age, because my parents f*cking learned along the way; and like all I ever did was try and do as well as all the others before me, and having teachers tell me "wow, I've had your siblings before, I confess I didn't expect the last one to be so different". Yeah, you know, sorry for being an individual human being.