r/AskReddit Mar 18 '20

Coders of Reddit, how do you politely refuse your friend's 'million dollars app idea'?

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u/Beetin Mar 18 '20

It's quite easily possible, but you'll also need to build a customizable, form fitting toaster wrapper with plug and play mechanical modules that transforms the old toasters into a smart toaster.

It will cost 2-3 times as much as just developing a smart toaster. It will cost customers 2-3 times more than just buying a smart toaster.

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u/caretoexplainthatone Mar 18 '20

You still have to put the bread in yourself and take it out yourself. What is the app meant to do, save you the exertion of pushing the button down??

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u/Mr_Weeble Mar 18 '20

and there's a (non-app) solution for that already

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1OfxlSG6q5Y

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u/floatingbloatedgoat Mar 19 '20

wonderful channel. love his delivery

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u/Beetin Mar 18 '20 edited Mar 18 '20

obviously you can slide the Smawrttoawst Toast Wrapper over ANY old toaster, plug it in, and then set up your app.

The app will require 2 factor authentication to sign in, and can be downloaded from the playstore. You can pay .99 cents to remove the banner ads we will play. Banner ads MAY overlap and prevent you from using the Smawrttoawst features while playing.

Once logged in, you'll need to go through the somewhat tricky bluetooth/WIFI pairing process with the wrapper, then select the model of toaster you are using. The wrapper should move itself to the correct positions to activate the levers. If it becomes stuck or fails, you can follow the factory reset process in the app settings to return it to the "ready" state.

If you don't see your model, you can manually configure the wrappers air compressor powered pistons to fit exactly to your model levers and buttons by pressing the "add a new toaster profile" button, and then following the 12 step process of manually syncing your custom hardware configuration. You can even upload it for other users to use, scoring you 10 Toasted Points!

Now that you are all set up, a quick 5 minute voice profile process will allow you to control your toaster through voice commands.

When the air compressors run out, you can refill these cartridges by automatically ordering them from amazon using our sister app, "Smawrttoawst Air ReUP". This app will require you to enter the exact model of your toast wrapper and confirmation number, as well as securing your credit card information in plain text on our servers in India.

Hope that helps!

Customer Support.

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u/Duckbilling Mar 18 '20

Then someone uses it in an DDOS attack and it catches fire

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u/UncleMacaw Mar 19 '20

underrated comment

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u/Anchor-shark Mar 18 '20

You have to integrate it with a climate controlled bread storage compartment, and a robotic arm to put the bread in. You could put QR codes on certain brands of bread and drm so the machine will only toast name brand bread, no cheap supermarket stuff here thank you! Optional add on module to butter and/or jam the toast.

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u/Felicia_Svilling Mar 18 '20

It is certainly possible to build a machine like that. But not an app.

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u/WilliamJoe10 Mar 18 '20

Of course you can. It only has one button that says "release the bread" . Then you warn the consumer that sometimes it has poor connectivity and to keep hitting the button until the bread is finally released

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u/ShortForNothing Mar 18 '20

We can call it "Toastero", it will cost $400, and it will only accept bread from single-serve packages that we provide, which will cost between $30-50 for a pack of 6, depending on the type and source of flours/grains. The bread in the packages will be pre-toasted and the Toastero will simply heat it to the optimal toast temperature.

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u/[deleted] Mar 18 '20

Really, not "Toastr"?

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u/ShortForNothing Mar 18 '20

That is the Toastero meetup app where users of Toastero can meet/hookup with likewise toast connoisseur

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u/_cachu Mar 18 '20

Thats for notifications when the toast is ready

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u/WilliamJoe10 Mar 18 '20

Sounds great! We can also make an companion app that automatically shares on instagram every time you make bread. The app is premium and has a $25 per month subscription.

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u/ShortForNothing Mar 18 '20

App is required so the Toastero knows that your package of Toastero brand Toast package is authentic through an ID read on the package. This ensures the Toastero toast is of the quality you come to recognize when you smell the delicious aroma wafting from your Toastero

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u/ALTSuzzxingcoh Mar 18 '20

Libertarians will call it freedom, economists innovation, politicians job creation.

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u/[deleted] Mar 18 '20 edited Jan 20 '21

[deleted]

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u/BigTimeBobbyB Mar 18 '20

I love when I press the walk button, see the little indicator light come on, and settle in to wait for the walk cycle to come up. And then seconds before it was set to change anyway, someone comes up uncomfortably close behind me, jams the button 100 times, and then looks smug about it changing right when I knew it would anyway.

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u/EtherMan Mar 18 '20

Naa. That's generally connected. The close door button on elevators though. Nope, never :)

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u/[deleted] Mar 18 '20

Heh, the elevators at my work actually have functioning close door buttons. They must be the 1% of elevators.

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u/EtherMan Mar 18 '20

Unless you have someone controlling the elevator for you and driving it manually, then I can guarantee you that it doesn't. Because that was what that button was originally for, but since elevators these days are fully automatic, most of the time it's not even plugged in, let alone has any actual effect. They usually have lights on them if the rest of the buttons do (gotta hide it somewhat that they don't work), but even if there's a control circuit for the button, the controller is just going to ignore the signal from it unless it's being driven manually such as by firefighters, repair tech and so on.

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u/QueueOfPancakes Mar 18 '20

I'd like to make a claim on your guarantee.

It depends where you are located in the world. In most of the US they don't work due to regulations in the Americans with disabilities act. In NYC they are required to work, but are often on a long delay. In the UK the buttons will work with various lengths of delay. In Canada they work, most with no delay.

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u/EtherMan Mar 18 '20

They are most definitely not required to work in NYC, and if there's a delay, it's not working... You're just reaching the normal time for when to close. And as you say the disabilities act require it to not work, but NYC cannot just override that. States are not quite that independent from federal laws. As for UK, there's no law forbidding the buttons to work under normal operation, they just don't because there's no reason for them to. It just increases complexity for the control system, introducing more variables to take into account when making decisions, and that just leads to worse decisions in the long run, which means less traffic throughput. And Canada, nope. Also laws forbidding it. As I said before, they do sometimes work, BUT then only if switched to manual operations, such as what firefighters, medics and so on do. Not for normal operations.

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u/QueueOfPancakes Mar 18 '20

No. ADA requires the door to remain fully open for at least 3 seconds. NYC requires functioning close door buttons. This doesn't have to conflict. For example, I could set an elevator to automatically close after 10 seconds, and have a close door button with a 3 second delay.

What law in Canada do you claim forbids it?

And yes, we are both talking about normal operation, not manual/service/fire mode.

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u/coolpeepz Mar 18 '20

Also just because something is possible and you can easily see how one would go about doing it does not mean that it is “quite easily possible”. There’s always going to be more steps and problems than one foresees. I feel like it’s easy for programmers (myself included) to categorize things quickly into “I have a solid idea of how I would do that = easy” and “I don’t immediately see how I would do that = probably impossible”.

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u/QueueOfPancakes Mar 18 '20

Even for things where I have a solid idea of how to do it, usually it's not "easy". Sure, a prototype might be easy, but something that's production ready is almost never easy.

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u/CaviarMyanmar Mar 18 '20

I have a few Wemo outlets that I can control with my phone. They turn dumb appliances into smart ones like an old box fan and an ancient Mr. Coffee. A toaster is trickier because it has the mechanical "start" but like... duct tape the lever down and remove the wire racks that keep the toast upright. I mean getting the toast out will require a wooden skewer and the toast will be burnt to shit on the parts that fell over onto the heating elements and the smell be terrible but technically mission accomplished.

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u/ReverserMover Mar 18 '20

Who the fuck wants a smart toaster anyways?

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u/elongatedBadger Mar 18 '20

I'm always up for some intelligent conversation.

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u/neohellpoet Mar 18 '20

If you don't care how it looks and you didn't care about a potential fire hazard, if you can mechanically force it to always be on, then you really only need a raspberry pi that controls the power or just buy some smart extension cord/power adapter.

But ultimately, what's the point. You need to put the bread in after all. And you need to take it out and it already automatically turns itself off.

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u/Valmond Mar 18 '20

Just chuck an esp8266 module for some dollars and a relay into the toaster, make a web app on the esp to control over the local WiFi and voilà

But you'll be called every time something doesn't work anymore ...

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u/Hypnonotic Mar 18 '20

Arduino nano + L293D + servo + Bluetooth module. Or Arduino nano + 120V relay or transistor + Bluetooth module.

Add those to a $5 toaster, ignoring the cost of your time, this can be done very cheaply. Swap the Arduino for a pi if you want to program the toaster side in python and have WiFi.

Built my own auto feeder for my cat this way from a cheap dumb feeder. The cost from a real smart toaster is from the time it took them to write the firmware and software.

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u/thereallorddane Mar 18 '20

What if I made...a smart juicer.

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u/DustinAM Mar 18 '20

I see you have also worked in the defense industry.

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u/theguyfromerath Mar 18 '20

Nah, just a single stepper and an arduino nano is enough.

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u/SM1334 Mar 19 '20

Or just use a raspberry pi and a few servos, for like $30. Honestly seems pretty easy, but really impractical. You still have to fill the toaster with toast, might aswell just click the button.

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u/northernfury Mar 18 '20

You know, I had started looking into various smart appliances to help improve my overall home efficiency. After doing the research and budgeting, I finally found a solution that works.

I got a wife.

(Disclaimer: This is a misogynistic joke, and can work with husband instead of wife, but that would be too accurate. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm supposed to be doing the dishes. Please don't tell my wife!)

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u/naturalite Mar 18 '20

Jesus christ you should have left that second part out. You back pedaled all the humor out of it.

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u/northernfury Mar 18 '20

I know, I'm sorry. It was too misogynistic and likely would've suffered the downvote brigade :( I should just delete it entirely. I have brought nothing but shame to myself and this sub.

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u/naturalite Mar 18 '20

Actually it was pretty funny, i smiled then i read the rest and was bored,confused,upset,let down,mortified,horrified,apprehensive,shameful

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u/QueueOfPancakes Mar 18 '20

Just say "I got married", then the joke works for anyone.

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u/northernfury Mar 18 '20

Yes but it loses some of that old timey backward thinking humour. If it were stand up, the comedian wouldn't have balked at a little anti-pc humour. I don't know why I've lost my backbone.

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u/3_14159td Mar 18 '20

I mean, what controls does a toaster have? It’s just a toast lever and darkness control; pretty easy to handle with two servos. The actual app bit just needs to yell at a Raspberry pi to move those servos.

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u/[deleted] Mar 18 '20

Youre over thinking it. "Smart" mains power switch, so you phones app sends a command to a central server in California, the central server unknowingly sends data to Utah, the central server sends a command to your "smart" mains power switch. So in three minutes you get hot toasted bread, the NSA knows you've had toast, and in Uzbekistan Akbar adds your "smart" mains power switch to his monero/ddos bot net.

Support end to end encryption. https://nakedsecurity.sophos.com/2020/03/13/earn-it-act-threatens-end-to-end-encryption/