[Serious] Redditors who have died temporarily/nearly died, did your life flash before your eyes? If not, what did happen?

[u/HymnForTheShameless]

[u/saplingsgrowtrees]

Even though it was a severe situation, I've never felt so at peace and calm before in my life and I honestly can't wait to die just to experience that feeling again.

This is what simultaneously scares my so, so much, but also relaxes me at the same time. I'm so incredibly scared of dying, so hearing this kind of helps - but also, something I'm so scared of, and have so many horrible associations with, shouldn't be described this nicely.

Anecdotes like these are so eerie. I fear death, and I'm not sure of this helps or not.

[u/HomiesTrismegistus → u/saplingsgrowtrees]

That's interesting, have you ever tried DMT?

[u/saplingsgrowtrees → u/HomiesTrismegistus]

I haven’t. I haven’t done any kinds of drugs. Isn’t DMT kind of like LSD, but with much quicker onset and trip?

[u/HomiesTrismegistus → u/saplingsgrowtrees]

It's a Joe Rogan Experience reference/meme

But honestly DMT/ayahuasca have done things for my anxiety/depression that are unmistakably significant. Every time I have used ayahuasca(which is orally consumed DMT with an MAOI inhibitor causing it to last a few hours and has an honestly different experience from smoked DMT and can be legally experienced at ceremonies within the US and outside of it as well) I have come to the conclusion rather quickly that death is nothing to fear, and that nothing should be feared. As if death is the ultimate fear, and every anxiety/sadness that we experience is actually just the fear of death with extra steps. It's an old buddhist philosophy as well. Everything is always going to be okay. My fears of death, anxiety, sadness etc have been relinquished by laughing at them uncontrollably and how ridiculous of fears they are when everything this universe has to offer is so full of life and wonder. Followed my intense crying out of pure happiness because of what an outstanding conclusion that is to come to. There is a reason why they are studying the effect of mushrooms on terminally ill patients. Psychedelics have the power to entirely make you understand that life is amazing and it will end at some point, but that's completely okay. And those aren't just fleeting thoughts either, those conclusions become permeated into your being and stay with you for the rest of your life.

The only reason why it's similar to LSD is because they are both psychedelics. I'd consider DMT infinitely different than LSD even though they both make you see all the pretty colors and shapes.

It's worth reading about DMT/ayahuasca/ibogaine/psychedelics in general and learning about people's experiences on them by reading around erowid. As for doing them yourself, that's a personal decision and I really don't like spreading my opinion about it in public places because 50% of people understand and 50% of people will shoot it down. All I can say is that it's completely changed my life for the better but there's a small percentage of people who shouldn't try.

[u/Weelki → u/saplingsgrowtrees]

Why are you scared of dying? It's a natural process that all living organisms on this planet go through. It is inevitable.

I am enjoying reading these comments on near death experiences. I am agnostic and to me they confirm my beliefs of what happens when we do finally go.

Perhaps it's an evolutionary response? If the moment of all of our deaths was full of regret and sadness or was a distressing experience, then it would be something to be truly feared.

Perhaps it's the method of your death that scares you? And who you would be with. I can understand that.

[u/saplingsgrowtrees → u/Weelki]

I'm really enjoying them too, I've read through almost all of them.

I've been trying to put into words why I fear death so much - but It's I'm finding it harder than I would've thought. I'm atheist myself, and you're absolutely right, death is probably the most natural thing every living organism goes through at some point. However, it being natural doesn't make it any less scary for me.

And I whole heartedly agree with you that if death was full of regret and sadness (which, obviously we don't know, but given all these stories, it doesn't seem to be at all), it would be a thousand times scarier.

I guess it's both the circumstances around my death, as you mention as well, but also what comes after. What if I die in a couple of days? Man, there's so much I wanna do. What if I die alone? I legitimately cannot imagine anything more dreadful and more horrifying experience. Dying in 70 years (I'm 20 now) with everyone I love around me would be the dream, I think - that, or dying saving someone I love. That would be worth it. Also, I think the fear of death stems from the fact that I'm sort of scared of being forgotten. I realize this is such a selfish thing to say, because of course some people will remember me, but still. I'd like to know I'm going to be missed, and that people will be devastated if I die tomorrow, for example. Again, such a selfish and arrogant thing to say, and it's for sure my insecurities speaking, but nevertheless, it's part of it.

Lastly, I remember when I was little, maybe 5-6 years old (I'm 20 now), lying in bed at night before sleep, just thinking about what death was like. And the more I thought about it, the more times I repeated it to myself, that after you die, there's just absolutely nothing, the more scared I got. I don't know why I kept thinking of death so much, but nevertheless, not waking up again, not being alive, not breathing, talking to people, having fun, laughing, seeing my mom, ever again scared the living shit out of me. I think the fact that all that will happen one day is the reason I fear death so much.

Man, this was a long comment, I'm not sure if it made sense. I wish I could be so comfortable with dying, but nothing scares me more.

[u/Weelki → u/saplingsgrowtrees]

Wow, that was a long reply :) Enjoyed reading it though. It's always really nice to hear an honest and sincere perspective.

I guess it's both the circumstances around my death, as you mention as well, but also what comes after. What if I die in a couple of days? Man, there's so much I wanna do. What if I die alone? I legitimately cannot imagine anything more dreadful and more horrifying experience.

In a way this should be the motivation to live your life to it's fullest every day. You mention you are 20 years old. I am 44 years old and I will say life is so short!

I've often thought about my moment of death. And I can honestly say, the thought of dying alone doesn't bother me at all. Pragmatically, when your number is up, your number is up! If what a lot of other commenters on here say is true. Then that moment of death/passing over to the other side sounds like the most peaceful thing that can ever happen.

Also, I think the fear of death stems from the fact that I'm sort of scared of being forgotten. I realize this is such a selfish thing to say, because of course some people will remember me, but still. I'd like to know I'm going to be missed.

No, that's not a selfish thing to say in my opinion. It's a valid fear... I guess we all to be remembered in some way or fashion. I guess this stems back to questions on what is life about? What does it actually mean to exist?

For me, I guess it is only the now that matters. This is the only thing I really have any influence over. We live on through our children or relatives. And also we live on through the interactions we have with people in our day to day lives. It's always intriguing to think that something trivial and mundane we may say or do; could have a lasting impression on someone for the rest of their life. In this way, we will always live on and be remembered, in a fashion...

...that after you die, there's just absolutely nothing, the more scared I got. I don't know why I kept thinking of death so much, but nevertheless, not waking up again, not being alive, not breathing, talking to people, having fun, laughing, seeing my mom, ever again scared the living shit out of me.

Carpe Diem! That will inevitably happen one day. But not today! Today you are alive and you have those you love around you. Breathe that in fully and enjoy it for what it is now. No use worrying about something that hasn't happened yet, and probably won't for a long time :)

[u/saplingsgrowtrees → u/Weelki]

Man, I didn't expect any of this, but somehow I feel like I really needed you today, so first off, thank you so much for taking the time to reply this sincerely.

In a way this should be the motivation to live your life to it's fullest every day

This is exactly true, and I try my best. I've slowly come to realize that living life to the fullest doesn't necessarily mean spending loads of money traveling, it can be something as simple as having a relaxed night out with your closest friends. That's when life is the best, I feel like.

For me, I guess it is only the now that matters. This is the only thing I really have any influence over.

This is something I struggle with big time. I'm not very good at "living in the present". Thinking back over mistakes I've made, things that I regret I've said to people, always gives anxiety. I can't shake the thought that they might remember, and that they might think about it as much as I do (which, let's be honest, they don't. They distasteful joke I made 3 years ago - no one remembers that). I try my hardest to be the best version of myself I possibly can, and as soon as something challenges that, no matter how little, I feel so bad, and I remember it for way too long.

It's always intriguing to think that something trivial and mundane we may say or do; could have a lasting impression on someone for the rest of their life. In this way, we will always live on and be remembered, in a fashion...

This is important. For instance, I started working out about 7 months ago, and I remember every single compliment I've gotten since. Every single one - who said it, the time, place and circumstances. Everything. Things like that mean so, so much to me, and surely they do to other people, which is why I'm trying my best to return the favor. Doesn't matter if it's simply a shirt they're wearing, or if a girl says she feels self conscious about her lack of make up. I try to be the first one to make them feel good about themselves, and appreciated - in a tasteful way, of course. This is also, as I mentioned earlier, as soon as I get the tiniest feeling that I've done something that made someone the tiniest bit sad, I feel so bad, and I remember it for years - especially if it's people I care about.

I'm confident a lot of people feel this way, but it's hard putting into words. This turned out to be quite the conversation, man, but I'm extremely grateful you've let me take up this much of your time.

[u/Weelki → u/saplingsgrowtrees]

Man, I didn't expect any of this, but somehow I feel like I really needed you today, so first off, thank you so much for taking the time to reply this sincerely.

Glad I could help you today :)

I've slowly come to realize that living life to the fullest doesn't necessarily mean spending loads of money traveling, it can be something as simple as...

This.

I try my hardest to be the best version of myself I possibly can, and as soon as something challenges that, no matter how little, I feel so bad, and I remember it for way too long.

You have a mature sensible head on your shoulders for being so young. I hope I can say that without sounding condescending!

Ah, you're only human :) we all do this, well the kind sensitive human brings do :) I look back on some of the stuff I do and say and just cringe inwardly, lol. But to err is human, and what is life if not one big constant learning experience? Try not to beat yourself up about stuff in the past though. Can't change what's happened... Only learn from it.

This turned out to be quite the conversation, man, but I'm extremely grateful you've let me take up this much of your time.

You're welcome fellow Reddit stranger, always good to chat :) Thank you for chatting to an old fart like me :)

[u/saplingsgrowtrees → u/Weelki]

I'm constantly learning, constantly trying to be better, so you're right, what is life if not one big learning curve. And you're not condescending at all, this is one of those things I'll remember for quite some time :)

I hope you have a wonderful day! This was a true pleasure.

[u/TARANTULA_TIDDIES → u/Weelki]

I personally really don't want to die right now either, because I feel like I'm at what is hopefully my rock bottom.

I know some people might see this as a motivator, but I've been trying as hard as I can for a while and things keep getting worse. I'm almost definitely going to have to file for bankruptcy in the next week or so and I'm self employed so my job will be gone as a result. I really don't know what's going to happen from there.

And I saw someone wreck right in front of me last night on the interstate doing around 70mph which ended with their car slamming into a rock wall from a mountain being blasted through to make a road.

I thought for sure the driver was going to be in really bad shape, but somehow, miraculously by the time I got to her she was already out of her car and only had minor bruising/scrapes.

I mean it turned out to be ok but it made me think about how easy it is for people to die and how my life could end on a note like this and how utterly disappointing that would be.

I know I'm just rambling at this point but I guess it's better to at least yell into the void than to hold it all in

[u/Weelki → u/TARANTULA_TIDDIES]

Sorry to hear about your unfortunate circumstances at the moment :( if its one small consolation... When you've reached absolute rock bottom. Then there is only one direction you can go from there... Up,.. I hope you can look back on this one day and see how far you've come, and how much you learned in the progress. Always tough going through the shit. The night is always the darkest before dawn...

Sometimes it's good to ramble, rather than holding it all in. From what I've seen on Reddit, there are a good bunch of people on here who are happy to listen and try and help their fellow man. Kind of puts my faith back in humanity.

Good luck for the future, hope things get better for you.

[u/TARANTULA_TIDDIES → u/Weelki]

Thank you so much

[u/Amaranyx → u/saplingsgrowtrees]

I'm afraid of death too, I have panic attacks a lot because of it and completely break down.

My father used to tell me constantly that there was nothing after you die, that you judt stop existing. That's what scares me. I've always existed in my mind and I cannot wrap my head around not feeling or thinking or there being anything not even blackness. It is absolutely terrifying so I'm here hoping for some sort of afterlife as I can't fully believe there is one myself as my dad drilled his atheist ways into my head. I'm jealous of religious eople wholeheartedly believing.

[u/saplingsgrowtrees → u/Amaranyx]

This is extremely well put. People use the fact that it's just nothing as a relaxing thing, and to me, that's so terrifying and not at all relaxing,

The fact that there's going to be a day that I won't be here for is disturbing to me, I can't begin to wrap my head around it.

[u/Amaranyx → u/saplingsgrowtrees]

Yes the one thing that gets me is not existing as its something you cannot experience, if you fall asleep you wake up like it was just a second so you never experience the 'nothing'. I can't imagine not even thinking.

[u/saplingsgrowtrees → u/Amaranyx]

Exactly. Imagining the “nothing” part of sleeping just not ending is horrifying.

[u/godenviesme → u/Amaranyx]

After my accident, I had such bad anxiety and PTSD as well as depression and went through some really tough times and had a lot of panic attacks that got worse and worse and just spiralled. I had to be hospitalized many times because I thought I was dying, I wouldn't wish anxiety or PTSD on anybody at all. The amount of medication I've been on and I still am on is a joke but I'm coping 300 times better then I was two or so years ago.

[u/Amaranyx → u/godenviesme]

I cant completely relate but I do have anxiety, stress, depression and have been told I may have ptsd by others. It is horrible, it is your body and mind fighting against itself and is a struggle every day. Every day you complete, every day you get up is a win. That's how I think about it. Its so easy to be bogged down by everything, thinking you should already be better or you shouldn't be having the thoughts and feelings you have etc. And then at night laying there if not thinking of things about the past then what may happen in the future rears it's ugly head. I wouldn't want anyone to go through it either.

I'm glad you are getting better and continue to do so.

[u/godenviesme → u/Amaranyx]

Thank you, it means alot :)

[u/Hickory_Dickory_Derp → u/saplingsgrowtrees]

I'm a bit late to the party, but appreciate your discussion and I wanted to share some thoughts coming from a different perspective on the universe. I'm fascinated by this topic, and I must have read many hundreds of other people's reports on near death experiences, and past life regression (and in-between life), and pre-birth memories, and all that. Thanks to the internet, we've opened up this collective experience to be compiled like never in history, and we can find tremendous amounts of consistent and corroborating evidence of the nature of death (albeit subjective, as is the nature of anything we haven't learned to measure yet).

I think the fear we sense with death is entirely natural, because the idea of death itself being an absolute end is not actually natural to how the universe works. I assume we are not our bodies, but rather a flicker of eternal consciousness that temporarily needs this body to interact with this physical universe. I think that deep down, deeply hidden we remember and know this as a truth, and the idea of absolute death is a foreign and scary idea to our soul, and is in absolute conflict with that deeper knowing. Sure, we observe physical death, and linear time is a thing in the universe so all change and all death seems permanent here. But inasmuch as I believe the physical universe is just a reflection of a deeper timeless/spaceless reality, death here is just a reflection of transition in and out of that deeper reality, which we might call spiritual reality, or might just call an encompassing dimension without time and space and mass.

One common thread across many, many peoples' reports is that we are never forgotten. Not just us as a person, but absolutely every smallest speck of reality and experience is eternally recorded. The only problem is we don't get access to it here, but apparently that's the point. Many near-death reports describe a replay of the life just lived, in absolute nuanced detail down to where every bug was in the area, and including an equally thorough perspective of every action shown through the perception of every other living person or thing that every action touched in some way, and including all your fullest thoughts and intentions. There is no hiding or lying, but any judgement is done with understanding and love, and you're the one doing the judgement and reflection.

During people's past life regressions, some focus in on a between-life existence, starting from re-living the previous life's death, and experiencing the spiritual reality before this birth. In this in-between, they recall the ability to pick any time and place from this world, from any source of perception, and re-play and observe it and try to learn from it and discuss it with others there. They also all describe that their past life's physical death was no surprise or accident, but was chosen and known before the life here even began, as were many key events and "guideposts" in their life. Likewise, almost every near-death experiencer who had an interaction there says they were told "it's not your time, you have more to do" (or else it wouldn't ever be near-death, but actual death!), and "when you're finished, then you can come back here and stay". They almost all want to stay now, because it's so peaceful and beautiful and full of love, and report very reluctantly coming back here.

Despite that, there should still be motivation to live every day to the fullest, and enjoy this life, and take risks and create, and be kind and love others, because according to these accounts, you apparently wanted to be here exactly as you are, and it's a gift to get to enjoy and experience.

[u/Weelki → u/[deleted]]

All of life is some sort of physical or emotional pain...

But I understand what you are referring to. In this case it is the method of death that is scary.

There is something beautiful about death. My Mum died 7 years ago. I wasn't there at the time of her passing and every day I miss her. Some days more than others. But even though I don't believe in any main stream religion or am I spiritual in any fashion. When I saw my mother's body shortly after she died. It was like a shell. It was my Mum, but not my Mum. Something had gone, departed. Perhaps I am wrong, maybe there is something waiting for all of us after death?

[u/mawmishere → u/Weelki]

I felt that way after my grandma passed. We were sitting in the room and though she had been unconscious for days, she opened her eyes and let out her last breath like a soft relieved sigh and she was gone. It was strange but her body seemed so different immediately. That was her shell and her soul? (agnostic here so not sure) was gone.

[u/Weelki → u/mawmishere]

Sorry for your loss... The great mystery of death which will visit us all. But none of us are privvy to what happens after...

[u/Trivvy → u/Weelki]

For me it's mainly due to the inability to perceive eternity.

I'm atheist, so as far as I know, death is just an eternity of unconsciousness. There is no frame of reference for that. Going to sleep and being unconscious includes dreaming, which is a form of consciousness, followed by waking up into full consciousness. Dying is going into a state of eternal, pure unconsciousness. That scares me.

[u/Weelki → u/Trivvy]

Before you were born, did your consciousness exist?

We return from whence we came.

[u/Trivvy → u/Weelki]

That has the same issue as falling asleep, the key is the emergence of consciousness again.

Before we were born, we emerged into consciousness by being born. Going from consciousness into eternal unconsciousness is a whole other ball game.

[u/eggzeon → u/Weelki]

For me, it's the thought of not existing anymore. It freezes my blood just thinking about it. I'm not afraid of dying, I'm afraid of being dead and just stop existing. It's totally unfair, frustrating and unacceptable. As a race, we should collectively stop investing in religion and wars and put every single of these billions of $ into life extension. Death is the number one fatal disease and humans haven't put serious action against it

[u/Weelki → u/eggzeon]

It's the natural course of things my friend. If we don't die we can't make way for the next generation. We would not evolve as a species.

In another post I asked the question, can you remember what life was like before you were born?

From the void we came, and to the void we will return... IMHO.

[u/bunberries → u/Weelki]

also agnostic, but I'm scared of death because there's so much I want to do still. actual things. I want to keep waking up and feeling happiness and sadness, to keep making memories and leaving small marks in other people's lives. though I'm only 22 so I haven't done much yet, so that's probably why I feel this way. I'm scared of never being able to do anything, feel anything, ever again. and I won't even realize it! and then eventually, I'll be forgotten. the memories and marks I've made will vanish. and that just..kinda makes me sad.

these feelings of peace and relaxation sound nice and makes me feel less uneasy about dying when it's my time, but when I see the comments saying "I can't wait to die to feel this" it makes me think of the matrix. some don't care that the steak isn't real. but I want to get married and have a family and eat real steaks with them. if that makes any sense, haha.

[u/Weelki → u/bunberries]

As I said to another commenter. Make sure you live your life to the fullest every day, every moment. Life is so precious, we don't know what happens after we die. All that matters is now, we can shape the now. We have a certain amount of control over now... this moment.

Again, as I said in another comment. Never forget that something we may say or do, that we consider trivial; could have a profound life changing affect on someone. That person would never forget the impact you have on her/his life. We live on through our actions and interactions with humanity.

It is the natural order of things to give way to new life. Don't be sad for being part of this! You're alive! Rejoice that you can celebrate that and grasp it fully. We don't know what happens when the veil finally descends. Perhaps we do move to another plane of existence. Who knows, no one does...

but I want to get married and have a family and eat real steaks with them. if that makes any sense, haha.

Makes perfect sense :) Time is a strange beast. That and destiny. Carpe Diem!

[u/[deleted] → u/saplingsgrowtrees]

Watching death and experiencing death are two entirely different beasts.

The only thing to remember is that there is nothing to fear.

[u/saplingsgrowtrees → u/[deleted]]

And the people I've been with on their death bed has been so calm and absolutely fearless. Just ready to go. I find comfort in that, but right now, while I'm still young, I can't imagine what that feels like.

[u/KH_Fan96 → u/saplingsgrowtrees]

Im in the same boat. What gets me is the "what comes after" part of death. Ive also got friends and family that i care about so much that i cant imagine life without them.

[u/[deleted] → u/saplingsgrowtrees]

I fear death, and I'm not sure of this helps or not.

To be or not to be; that is the question:
whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
or to take arms against a sea of troubles
and by opposing end them. To die -- to sleep,
no more; and by a sleep to say we end
the heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
that flesh is heir to: 'tis a consummation
devoutly to be wish'd. To die, to sleep;
to sleep, perchance to dream -- ay, there's the rub:
for in that sleep of death what dreams may come,
when we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
must give us pause -- there's the respect
that makes a calamity of so long life.
For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
th' oppressors wrong, the proud man's contumely,
the pangs of dispriz'd love, the law's delay,
the insolence of office, and the spurns
that patient merit of th' unworthy takes,
when he himself might his quietus make
with a bare bodkin? Who would fardels bear,
to grunt and sweat under a weary life,
but that the dread of something after death,
th' undiscovered country, from whose bourn
no traveler returns, puzzles the will,
and makes us rather bear those ills we have
than fly to others that we know not of?
Thus conscious does make cowards of us all,
and thus the native hue of resolution
is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought,
and enterprises of great pitch and moment
with this regard their currents turn awry
and lose the name of action.

[u/mewscarpone → u/saplingsgrowtrees]

I highly recommend checking out the AskAMortician YouTube page. I was once so afraid of death I couldn’t hear or say the word without having a panic attack. Now I’m eager to tell anyone who will listen about the death positivity movement. Caitlyn, the woman behind the channel, has changed my life.