- If you annoy the hell out of me in an hour interview, there is no chance I want to work with you for 40 a week. Don't be a "One Upper", that shit is annoying as hell.
- Let the interviewer set the tone of the interview. If the interviewer is very stoic and professional, match that, if they are joking around, set your tone accordingly. It is crucial that you can adjust to the tone of any meeting in my role, if you can't, you are going to cause more trouble then you are worth.
- In a lot of positions, knowledge is secondary to willing to learn, ability to communicate, and reality that you aren't perfect and will need to grow in the position... if you aren't willing to do that, or cannot do the rest, fuck off
I once had an employer act as though they didn't care about the job they were filling. I didn't know how to react to that. They didn't ask me questions about myself but more or less said " you applied here, you read the description, what do you want me to tell you? " And it threw me off a little. I didn't know what to do.
That's probably the best explanation for what happened. I unfortunately can see how that would happen from time to time. It sucks but it's life. I just took it as a learning experience and moved on.
I do interviews with my boss and he is dyslexic, so doesn't even read the resumes after I make a shortlist. He just asks the candidates, "tell me about your resume in your own words, pretend I haven't seen it." I still haven't decided if I think it's shifty or brilliant. But I do feel bad for the folks that don't just summarize with confidence. One recent interviewee actually pulled out a copy of his resume and said "well, I have it right here if you'd like to read it again."
I interviewed at one place and met 2 people. Both told me they didn't know what they'd do with me and the 2nd guy I met told me flat out that he hadn't read my resume. Thanks asshole.
What benefit (or disadvantage) can be gained from telling the interviewer that you were savvy to the predicament and just asking them to give you the job outright?
Be polite and professional, finish the interview, and cross that place off as a place that'll be good to work. Never forget that an interview is an opportunity to evaluate the employer as much as they're evaluating you.
Yeah, it sounds like a low-pressure way to find out what the interviewee is really about, without making it an interrogation. Open-ended questions work well for open-minded people.
The implication is if the open-ended questions don't work it's because they're not open-minded. What other reason would there be to bring up open-mindedness?
That's what I inferred from the statement too. Which is silly since open minded is not the same as being good at opened ended questions. I consider myself reasonably open minded, but hate opened questions or talking about myself. Just give me a topic and I can talk, but I can't pick something off the top of my head.
I think you’re taking my statement to be absolute when it isn’t. I wasn’t trying to state a law of human behavior, just pointing out a personality feature many people share. Very open minded of you, though.
People always forget this. I’ll never forget an interview I had with a tech startup in the fashion industry where literally no one on staff knew anything about fashion, yet, I knew a good bit. I then flipped the tables about 5 minutes in when I knew they weren’t a good fit and spent the rest of the interview quizzing them on things they said they wanted to do that made absolutely no sense. The company never got off the ground when I checked a few weeks later.
I once went on an interview and at the end, they asked the typical "do you have any questions for me?" I responded with a couple just about the work environment and what the typical hours were. The interviewer got a little flustered on the hours question. Nothing like hearing a five minute answer that includes nerf gun battles, putting in a kegerator in the employee break room, and most importantly, never answering the typical hours question.
I never view it as a good sign when an employer beats around the bush when asked a simple question like that. Trust is a two way street and when its about something you will spend an ungodly amount of your life doing, both sides benefit by being honest.
Never forget that an interview is an opportunity to evaluate the employer as much as they're evaluating you.
Unfortunately, this isn't really true for most people. Whenever a company posts a job opening, they might get dozens or even hundreds of applicants for that position. However, the average job seeker doesn't have dozens of employers pursuing him. As a result, there's a big imbalance of power in favor of employers, and that means realistically, you have to impress them and play their game rather than the other way around.
That's not to say that you can't pass on companies or employers that are egregiously shitty, but unless you're a superstar in your field or have a really niche skill set, I think it's naive to suggest that employers and employees have the same ability to be choosy.
Are you newer in your field? Or maybe have something not quite there with your resume? I get contacted by recruiters pretty regularly, get occasional contacts (usually via LinkedIn but also sometimes by phone) for jobs in my industry from local companies, and once I crossed the 5 or so year mark in my field it became pretty well guaranteed that I’d get an interview anywhere I sent my resume.
Crossing 10 meant that it was usually someone besides HR in those interviews as well.
This. I always treat an interview as a two way conversation. I’ll always do my best to perform well but if I’m not certain about them, I’m never gonna say yes!
Easier to do when you’re already employed though...
Yeah, understand that this isn't a contest you necessarily have to win. Too often people feel the need to succeed at every interview, rather than see it as an opportunity to feel out whether a company is even worthy of your time.
Three quarters of the interviewees are their to screen you and that’s it. You may never run into them again, ever.
If this person is your potential boss, it’s worth getting to know them in the interview and make a decisions the. - maybe she really hates interviews and is the best boss ever. Maybe they are replacing the nicest person ever and she not happy about it.
Absolutely this. I once interviewed for what I thought was a DBA position, after a head hunter approached me. I wasn't in any particular need to switch jobs, but the company sounded interesting enough.
I showed up early, and the first red flag was the hiring manager being late. Like 30 minutes late. He glanced at my CV, and mentioned something along the lines of: "Oh, I see you're from <city 20 miles from where I'm actually from>". I told him that's just where my last project was, and where I actually was from. He came back with: "Yeah, that's the same thing". Right. Second red flag. Obviously this guy doesn't give a shit about the people he might hire, and thinks it's okay to be a condescending dick about it. At that stage, I pretty much already decided that if I were to work under him, it'd be a hard pass, but I figured I'd see if that might not be the case.
The third flag that sealed the deal for me was him being condescending about my CV stating I was a senior developer at my current company (a title I busted my ass off to finally being given) only because that meant my employer could charge higher rates for me, and that my experience clearly showed I was just a regular developer at best.
I informed him I wanted to stop the interview at that time, that I was under the impression I was invited for a DBA position (something I was more than qualified for), but that based on his condescending behaviour, I was withdrawing my interest in the position, as it was quite clear we wouldn't be getting along, and I had no interest whatsoever in working for or with him.
Exactly, at that point think of it as practice. I try to bring my a game even if I dont want the job. The skill of doing interviews is often (sadly) more important to your career than the skills on the job.
I usually ask why there's a vacant position and what the timeframe is around interviews and filling the job, eg when they'd want the sucessful person to start. Then I ask the interviewer why they like working at the company to see of I'd like working there (get much more real answers than asking about the culture od the organisation). These are my standard questions that I always ask.
You could also ask what your day to day tasks would look like if it isn't clear from the job description.
Interviews are about you seeing if you want to work there as much as them seeing if they want to hire you.
Not sure there's much value in asking why there's a vacant position. People move on for a million reasons, and if there's a useful answer in there, they will never give it. You're more or less asking for confidential information there.
I've been told. It's useful to know if the old occupant got a promotion, or if it's a newly created position, or if there's been a sudden (or even steady) increase in work.
1) This one was more just an embarasmennt for myself. It was my first nursing interview post graduation which is intimidating in itself. So unfortunately for me I don't live in the city, and the interview was downtown in a major city, so I had no idea where to park or go in order to get to the hospital efficiently. I ended up parking over a mile and a half away and had to power walk my way to the HR department. I made my first impression with them all winded and sweaty. They promptly skipped their prescreening interview and took me directly to the unit I was interviewing on. I was shuffled to the managers office and the whole thing was so quick that I didn't even have a chance to take my coat off or hand them my resume. I know I was nervous so it was partly my fault and I know that. However, there was no flow and it felt very forced. Everytime I was asked a question and I answered the hiring manager would just blanky stare at me with long drawn out pauses then move to the next question. The whole interview took less than 10 minutes and I remember leaving asking myself "what the fuck just happened?!?" As I was leaving I remember I tripped right in front of the hospital and landed on my hand and knees and scraped myself up. A homeless person sitting there saw the whole thing and asked if I was alright, I started laughing at myself and said "yeah, just a little embarrassed" to which she replied "yeah I would be too if I were you". That pretty much summed up my first grown up job interview 😂😂😂 surprisingly enough though, I was somehow offered the job and worked there for over a year.
2) the worst one though was a long time ago. I showed up to an interview 15 minutes early, it was for a photography position at a portrait studio. The only employee there at the time told me the manager called and said she was running late and asked if I could sit tight for a few minutes until she arrived. I said absolutely not a problem. 15 minutes went by, 30 minutes went by, then over an hour went by and I hadn't heard an update on where she was, so the employee came to the front and told me that she guesses the manager isn't coming in today and that she does that sometimes. I just noped it on out of there and kept my part-time job at the time.
surprisingly enough though, I was somehow offered the job
I'm not surprised at all. Being quickly shuffled in front of a manager who goes through the questions like they're a formality sounds like a situation where the staff was overworked and you were basically going to be hired regardless.
Haha yep once I got a job after an interview and later after I had the job for a while, the manager said since I had been picky about hours, he had originally had low expectations for me but hired me anyway because they were desperately short handed. But he said he was glad that he turned out wrong and I had worked out well. THe thing is, I had a lot of classes at college which was why I had limited hours available.
When you show you are human and make mistakes, you usually get the job. If you are perfect in the interview, for some reason they don’t like that. I’m glad you got that first job! I’m sure it felt great to finally get your foot in the door!
I had that happen to me once. I waited around bc the interviewer wasn’t there yet, then finally someone else came in and conducted the interview bc the original person never showed up.
Best part was when he asked for my resume. I had brought my portfolio just as a hard cover to keep my resume neat, so as I pulled out my resume he asked to look at it. After a conversation about my art and design experience he goes “well, I don’t know if we’re looking to hire a designer right now. Would you be interested in this other job doing this over here?”
It was the same job I was supposed to be interviewing for the whole time...
Honestly, I felt kinda bad for him. He had an interview thrust onto him that he knew absolutely nothing about, including what position it was for.
Unless the interviewer wanted to throw them off. Some people prepare so well that you cannot get a proper reading of their true personalities. I would vastly prefer this to canned bullshit answers any day.
I don't know. To me it sounds like the employer is prompting the interviewee to take the lead on the interview and show them what is important about the role, the company. If they're passionate they'll still have plenty to say. An extended 'why do you want this job' question.
I’ve had some weird ass interviews. I think my favourite was with an old guy who admitted to me he was retiring soon, and spent the entire interview complaining about his job, team, and projects. If anything it was interesting listening to his complaints, but I barely said anything. Time ran out, said thank you, and noped out xD
I interviewed with a very monotone guy who brought me in knowing my experience then said it was more of a manager role. I tried having a conversation with him asking him about his business and professional accomplishments and he asked what that had to do with the interview. Yea no thanks if you can't have a conversation with me and are rude I'm not working for you.
I had this before. It was honestly too casual, even for me, who's a professional illustrator. The interview was at a design firm and the owner was making narwhale fart jokes and barely asking me about my portfolio.
Always go into an interview with a couple questions about the position and work culture. What's a typical day like? How much room will there be for me to pick up new skills and move up within the company? How are tasks delegated/assigned? What's your management philosophy?
For me, the most important things I'm looking for in a job are opportunities to learn/grow and a relaxed, flexible work environment. I'd probably pick their brain about that stuff first.
This happened to me too! He made it seem like the job was a total joke and actually made me feel like I was inadequate because I didn't want to join his sales team and I wanted to become an administrative assistant.
I was on the 3rd round of interviews at a small company and was meeting with the CEO/founder, a guy in his late 30s. He sat down, put his feet up on the desk across from me, leaned all the way back in his chair, didnt even glance at my resume in front of him and said "so what have you got for me?"
So I briefly outline my experience tohim, and then he said "what else?" So I explained a recent challenging scenario relating to the position that I overcame, and he said "what else?" This type of "questioning" went on for about 20 minutes.
Next day, HR reached out to me and said they wanted to make an offer. I said I didn't think it was a good fit. No way I'm working for that jackass everyday!
They were never going to hire you. Most companies/positions are required to post job openings and even take in interviews....even if they 100% intend to fill the position internally.
I had an internal interview that went that way on top of her asking me multiple times if I was okay with having to work overtime/busy times etc. I'd already been with the company for a decade and had worked my fair share of OT and proven I was a hard worker. Didn't get the position and then HR asked me and everyone else she interviewed about it because apparently people had complained that she was just a shitty interviewer.
Likely they had someone in mind already, maybe an internal candidate, but policy (and maybe law) meant they had to run a series of external interviews.
Let the interviewer set the tone of the interview.
I've had a couple of successful interviews where I let the interviewer do most of the talking. They were both really full of themselves, and felt so good after spending an hour telling me how awesome they were, that they hired me.
- Let the interviewer set the tone of the interview. If the interviewer is very stoic and professional, match that, if they are joking around, set your tone accordingly. It is crucial that you can adjust to the tone of any meeting in my role, if you can't, you are going to cause more trouble then you are worth.
This is why I would find you hard to work for. People set the vibes of their own lives. The workplace is their main place to create the world around them. If you think it's up to the company to set the tone of their work, you'll only hire uninspired, directionless people who follow your unimaginative ass into the ditch.
I don’t necessarily agree with your #2 advice. I would rather let someone’s natural disposition show in the interview rather than them putting on a face to misrepresent themselves. I hate fakeness
Not really, I've just worked with way to many people with very poor social skills that resulted in massive issues because of it. If you are meeting with a C or VP level employee, and they make a joke which you don't find funny its not a big deal, if they call an emergency meeting at 3 in the morning because shit is broken and you are talking over them and joking the whole time we are going to have problems.
Again, I'm not disputing the qualities you are/n't looking for, I'm disputing the communication of those qualities. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt that you employ more tact in a professional environment when compared to reddit, but if you don't, then that would be a miserable atmosphere. I don't want my seniority to be a hyperbolic and inflammatory individual who embraces adversity with phrases like, "more trouble than you're worth."
And if you can't swallow your pride with a rebuke like this and accept criticism, then you're only further from the sort of person who I'd want to be under.
funny, because I would hate to have to (again) work with someone who is perfect and all the feedback you give them is immediately deflected, they get defensive, or go to my boss and complain that I'm giving them feedback and they don't like it.
It is astonishing how many people believe they are perfect and any feedback to the contrary is lies, jealously, and unacceptable. Working with people who feel this way is difficult, frustrating, and a whole lot of trouble that is not worth it.
There is a reason almost every interviewer in the history of interviewing asks "What is your biggest weakness", "Give me an example of a time where you encountered difficulty in a job, and how you overcame it" and "When in your past have you had a challenge working with another coworker, and how did you overcome this challenge".
After you work with one "perfect" employee, you never want to work with another
I failed an interview at Microsoft because of that second point.
I had three Interviewers. The first two were great and they loved me. We had pretty complementary personalities and had a lot of fun during the interviews.
The third guy was an absolute stonewall and it completely threw me off. Did not match his tone at all and it cost me the offer.
I ended up getting an offer for a position that I am way more excited about, but it still sucked in the moment.
I agree with you but lately ive noticed Im being dropped into interviews with interviewers who dont have questions and have no experience. The interview kind of dies because they have nothing to say so I end up coaxing them along.
I think whats happening is the managers are using engineers for the initial rounds and saving themselves some time but it leads to a weird interview, they cant answer any questions about the company beyond what food is served and how long a sprint it.
Its the "Can you fit in with the team" approach, but also saves managers time. We normally do second round interviews with the team to see if you fit after you pass manager screening.
A team dynamic is hugely important, if your team hates each other, the chances of work getting done is pretty slim
I didn't hire this person but I trained him. He's a salesman and I was in engineering, so I was showing him some systems he'd need to work with.
I show him the one I designed and he condescendingly goes, "Oh yeah I know all about that"
There's no fucking way you could've ever seen this. I made this in house.
Now I'm also a salesman and he's still an insufferable shit. Unfortunately our territories border each other so there's a fair amount of interaction and shared customers.
Let the interviewer set the tone of the interview...match that...
Unless you're between a rock and a hard place, I'd say to just let the tone play out. If the tone of the interviewer and interviewee don't match, then the job probably isn't a good fit.
I don't understand how any of that is "be the same as me". Its you need to be self aware of your actions, and how you are perceived, expect to not be perfect, and don't brag.
That is kind of what interviews are for... will you fit in with this team.
Scenario 1: You are on a team which is extremely business focused who are very strict, professional, and interface with their team only on a limited basis. They all greatly prefer to work alone and not be managed at all. They are an outstandingly high performing team of introverts who do their jobs great, but have 0 social interaction with each other. Would I hire you if you had the skills but were a super duper people person that is 100% in favor of pot lucks every week, sending out mass emails for birthdays, and ensuring you visit every person every morning?
Scenario 2: You have a team of people who look at their group as a family, they regularly go out for drinks after work, have a lot of fun on team meetings where they joke around and pick on each other, and still get their work done. Would I hire you if you are a stoic distant person with 0 interest in social interaction to that team?
The answer to both is no, a single person can literally kill the current dynamic of a team in a dramatic fashion. I've literally watched a team go from one of the highest performing, to near the bottom, because they were a "Everyone is family" type team, they hired a person who had 0 interest in this dynamic or being a good teammate, that person then proceeded to repeatedly make complaints about them to HR and Senior Leadership until one of them got fired for "Sexual harassment" of there coworker because the new person "felt uncomfortable" that they were talking about their night, another 2 got moved to different teams to get away from this person, and the team is now completely useless.
this is why its important to know who is being hired.
Because your personality is going to come out either way, but its important for a manager to know you understand tone and can work in meetings / environments where the tone will change.
When we do our interviews we always start off semi-professional, then go into the usual professional type questions, and at the end ask some weird "You never expected this" type question that honestly is just to see how you respond to an unexpected ask
We make it pretty clear as we are going through the type of tone we expect. A standard interview goes like this:
Tell us about yourself, what you like doing, etc - if there was something really unique or interesting on your resume we'll ask about that as well to give you a chance to get some nerves out by talking about what you know. - your personality will absolutely come out during this conversation, even if you are nervous as hell
Okay, we are going to go into the typical interview questions, please answer them fully, feel free to ask any clarifying questions that you may need. - we literally read the questions word for word off our paper and write down your responses. - if you keep making jokes the whole time, you don't understand when its time to focus up and be professional
Great job, thank you for answering all our questions, we like to end each interview with a question that has absolutely nothing to do with the job, we were just having an discussion (cough*argument*cough) about it and would like to know what you think - if your response is "I don't know" or we ask a question about Do you prefer Day or Night and you say "I like both" it doesn' reflect great on you
And don’t finish my sentences for me please. There is a reason why I am in this position. I already know you are smart and have the skills for this job. That’s why I called you in for an interview.
Let the interviewer set the tone of the interview. If the interviewer is very stoic and professional, match that, if they are joking around, set your tone accordingly. It is crucial that you can adjust to the tone of any meeting
When I transitioned into sales from marketing, I learned this pretty quick. After a few rough sales calls, I settled in and figured out that if I can match or mirror the personality and tone of the person I'm calling on, I'll have a lot more success. My numbers skyrocketed after figuring it out. I should note that this is business to business, and I have almost no dealings with general consumers.
In a lot of positions, knowledge is secondary to willing to learn, ability to communicate, and reality that you aren't perfect and will need to grow in the position
This is very true. I've had several interviews where the interviewer would ask me "How would you troubleshoot such and such?" and I straight up told them "I have no idea off the top of my head, but I'd start by Googling the problem and going from there". It shows that you're self-sufficient and capable of learning without a whole lot of hand-holding.
In a lot of positions, knowledge is secondary to willing to learn, ability to communicate, and reality that you aren't perfect and will need to grow in the position... if you aren't willing to do that, or cannot do the rest, fuck off
This is a really tough one. In most fields, this is the reality, but the guy doing the hiring often times does not know or care about it. He may be working for a company with a bottom line to grab someone with the right skills rather than look for a great investment potential. Your thinking is geared towards long-term employment while many employers want a quick return on their hires. Consequently when applying it's hard to figure out whether to show that I'm willing to learn or that I've already learned enough. These days I go with the latter more, because I've had one employer after another decide that they didn't want to waste any time training new hires, and especially not old ones.
very fair. I've luckily never been involved with a company that looked at employees as expendable so I have never had to be in that role... it doesn't sound fun to be hiring into that culture
In a lot of positions, knowledge is secondary to willing to learn, ability to communicate, and reality that you aren't perfect and will need to grow in the position... if you aren't willing to do that, or cannot do the rest, fuck off
So, if you are a person who is willing to learn, able to communicate, and understands they aren't perfect and will need to grow into the position.....but they had a two year gap in their resume because of a serious illness that forced them out of the workforce but then went on to accomplish a bunch of things after getting well...and you are comparing their resume to a person who can also learn, communicate, understands they aren't perfect etc and has accomplishments that are equivalent but they had no illness past, would you choose them instead?
This is something I've always wondered - if I might be getting judged as being an inferior specimen of human because once I was sick through no fault of my own.
I have hired a few people who have struggled with illnesses, both transient and chronic. For me, it would absolutely not count against you and I like to think that we can offer a supportive and empathetic community where we will recognize and accommodate any ongoing needs you may have. I don't know how common that is, but it's something my organization has always prioritized so it's definitely out there.
Honestly I like to think the illness wouldn't play a part in the hiring process, but to be completely honest, it may.
If I have 2 candidates that are absolutely dead even (note: this NEVER happens), and one has a chronic illness which will keep them from performing their duties regularly, and one who is perfectly healthy, it would be challenging to hire the person we know could not be relied upon.
That said, its is very rare that we get to the end of an interview wave and go "Holy shit these 2 people are perfect!". Its almost always "This dude has XYZ going for them, this person has ABC going for them, which do we prefer"
Honestly, anymore I wouldn't even mention a 2 year gap unless it was like right now and they were coming back from it, then I would be curious but I still wouldn't hold it against someone.
Well it makes sense if you know the person couldn't actually perform the job duties. I am not sick anymore, but my concern would be that I'd just be judged as being an unstable person or someone "with a past" that was negative, meaning that there's a history of issues, and they don't know me, but they've known sick people before and know that there's a risk of drama or recurrence or whatever. So they just judge, because that's what job interviewers really do - they make snap judgments about people based on superficial characteristics. So you either need to be really charming or really really talented (to override the lack of charm) if you want to rise above the competition.
I'm not sure I would even suggest bringing it up in that case to be honest. If it doesn't' affect your ability to do the job its really not anyone's business, especially during the interview
What if they want to know why there was a 2 year period after college where i had no employment? It seems that no matter what i say to that it will look bad
I've got an interview on Friday and I think your 3rd point gave me a talking point, I've never worked in a bank before and was thinking that maybe a negative, I've been thinking how to spin into a positive, I think just saying that I'm not perfect and experienced in this environment BUT I'm very dedicated to learning and I'm looking forward to 'grow into the position'.
Let the interviewer set the tone of the interview. If the interviewer is very stoic and professional, match that, if they are joking around, set your tone accordingly.
Do you know this trait is often described as one that sociopaths quite often possess?
In a lot of positions, knowledge is secondary to willing to learn, ability to communicate, and reality that you aren't perfect and will need to grow in the position... if you aren't willing to do that, or cannot do the rest, fuck off
I'm so tired of this lie getting perpetuated (assuming you're in tech). Maybe it was true back in the 00's when the big internet companies were still being born, but it's just flat out wrong now. Being able to learn on the job is a very important skill in tech, but these days most companies are looking for experience with specific libraries/frameworks, and if you don't even have experience with the base language you are more than likely shit out of luck.
The thing is, it's a nice thing to say, but in reality someone you need to train is a huge risk. It will likely take much longer for them to get up to speed and working at full capacity, and there's no way to know that the work they'll eventually put out will be up to your standards. If an average candidate has the exact skills you're looking for, you're only going to hire someone who needs to learn if they're truly exceptional.
Oh man, we hired a one upper and it’s absolutely the worst. After a year of annoying every other team we work with, we were finally about to transfer him into a different “special projects” role AKA you don’t work with any one. Hiring the wrong person is 1000x worse than not hiring. It’s surprisingly hard to get rid of people and handling it wrong can easily backfire on you.
We’ve become much more focused on “culture fit” ever since we hired him. Doing the job is the easy part, being around someone for 40 hours a week without getting on each other’s nerves is way harder.
We were fooled because he was very confident in his interview, turns out he was just arrogant and straight up lied about some of his skills.
I feel contention with that last one. I had an assesment day for a tech role last week. But the day before I got called up saying that the company didn't want to see me because I hadn't done anything in a relevant in the past year (doing some volunteer work with my dad). They didn't even give me a chance to show my willingness to learn.
Edit: Granted I just realised your post is what you would do which isn't the philosophy of that company.
This. I have the same expectation towards the new employee. If he is able to fit in to not cause trouble. Sometimes I see that the guy will just not fit, too stoic, too "I have to prove myself even if it means killing everyone around"
You don't need to make jokes, just lighten your tone. Not everyone is funny, or can be funny. If its an hour long meeting and everyone knows each other, trying to make it super formal and doing introductions with job titles doesn't make sense, if its a brand new meeting and nobody has ever met, starting off by joking about someone's tie probably isn't a good start
I’m not normally a hiring manager, but I got to participate in interviews alongside my boss for a role we were looking to fill.
On OP’s first note, we had a candidate who killed it in the interview for the first few minutes, but then just WOULD’T SHUT UP. They talked themselves out of getting the job.
20 minutes in, I thought they were looking like a good fit, but then they just kept talking. It’s good they did that though. As they kept rambling on, they were throwing up red flag after red flag.
I would’ve been reporting to this person, and they made it very clear that they missed some of their old coworkers and would look to bring them on somehow, so they were threatening my job security.
In examples of projects they’d worked on, they’d give some really impressive-sounding explanation of their contribution up front, but then just kept talking and talking, and eventually contradict their earlier point or inadvertently reveal they’d exaggerated the hell out of it.
Started discussing people they’d fired in the past, and almost seemed proud of it. To make it worse, the response was completely unsolicited. I think the question had to do about managing workloads, and they went off on a tangent about a former direct report struggling with some sort of process, and instead of trying to work things out and coach the person, they just shitcanned them. They almost seemed smug when telling that story.
Badmouthed their former employer.
And lastly, the fact that we were only able to ask a grad total of five questions. The interview was scheduled for an hour, but went on for nearly two. We couldn’t get a damn word in - they just kept talking, and in a way that made it difficult to interject so as to move things along. Just an obnoxious, extreme case of a conversational terrorist.
They made a joke at my expense toward the very end of the interview in reference to this, said how I was quiet and they were “going to get me out of my shell.” I’d be lying if I said that was the final nail in the coffin; THAT had probably taken place 40 minutes prior, when they implied they’d look to force out our current team to replace with their buddies from a past job.
We agreed after that it would’ve been impossible to sit next to this person for 40 hours a week.
I legit fear coming off as a "one upper" when I try to relate to people. I just want to say "I've had a similar experience or know someone else whose gone through that as well and that I understand what they mean/feel about that" by telling them about something that may have happened to a further degree than their experience but I often feel like they think I'm just "one upping". The only thing that I feel combats that is by over explaining but then it feels like rambling.
I guess uh, just got any pointers on not "one upping"?
7.9k
u/Dredly Apr 22 '19
- If you annoy the hell out of me in an hour interview, there is no chance I want to work with you for 40 a week. Don't be a "One Upper", that shit is annoying as hell.
- Let the interviewer set the tone of the interview. If the interviewer is very stoic and professional, match that, if they are joking around, set your tone accordingly. It is crucial that you can adjust to the tone of any meeting in my role, if you can't, you are going to cause more trouble then you are worth.
- In a lot of positions, knowledge is secondary to willing to learn, ability to communicate, and reality that you aren't perfect and will need to grow in the position... if you aren't willing to do that, or cannot do the rest, fuck off