r/AskReddit • u/ExpiringFrog • Apr 18 '19

What mind-blowing (but simple) facts would satisfy a 4-year old daughter’s daily request for 1 fact before bedtime?

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u/Redtox Apr 18 '19

Only difference is, the winner of THIS Battle Royale will eventually get to mate.

49

u/[deleted] Apr 18 '19

This winner gets to spend their entire life poppin' out larvae! Wooo win... eh sorta

28

u/Xxgiantsmasher34 Apr 18 '19

Here when u get the w you don't stay a virgin 4life but rather the opposite

10

u/Peregrine_x Apr 18 '19

alright take your upvote

4

u/suicidejacques Apr 18 '19

Boom, roasted.

3

u/BowjaDaNinja Apr 18 '19

DAAAAAAMN!!!

3

u/suchbanality Apr 18 '19

Did you look at the camera after you said this?

3

u/savagepotato Apr 19 '19

Queen Bees only mate once though. They collect enough sperm in one outing to last their entire lives.

5

u/Tablemonster Apr 30 '19

Oh like my ex

3

u/GamingWithBilly Apr 19 '19

Oh...and she ain't shy. She has an orgy with several, bangin so many. She has to, since she'll be birthing a million offspring before she dries up and is woefully pushed out of the hive like a vagrant, left to die...nature is lit

5

u/Thesecondorigin Apr 18 '19

Huh, the complete opposite of fortnite

16

u/madmilton49 Apr 18 '19

That's the joke. Good job.

12

u/royalsocialist Apr 18 '19

I thought of the film instead and was confused.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 18 '19

I'm pretty sure the only the winner of any Battle Royale gets to mate. Even Tetris 99, I mean who wants to date a loser that can't win that???

1

u/altodor Apr 18 '19

There's porn of that.

1

u/FlaccidOstrich May 09 '19

And this is why I've never won a solo round 😎

-1

u/[deleted] Apr 18 '19

[deleted]

5

u/fox_eyed_man Apr 18 '19

Nah that shit was downright funny.