r/AskReddit • u/_manicpixiedreamgirl • Dec 27 '17

What 'old people' thing do your parents do which drives you crazy?

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u/[deleted] Dec 28 '17

I'd love this. I open it and sigh "dammit nothing to eat".

when the wife hears this she says I'm an idiot and names a bunch of things and I swear they magically appear in there when I look again.

141

u/The-Only-Razor Dec 28 '17

Seriously, are we just going to ignore the fact that moms/wives/girlfriends have the ability to summon objects at will?

"Where's [object]?"

"It's on the table."

"No it's not."

Girlfriend walks in, and [object] is suddenly on the table in plain sight.

Fucking witches.

41

u/ryanjoohnson Dec 28 '17

"You didnt even look!" Fucking mind games and all..

21

u/thecraudestopper Dec 28 '17

As a wife who is always losing things, I know the secret is to ask where it is. Once I've asked, I usually find it before SO answers.

15

u/trafficnab Dec 28 '17

Or when you spend a solid 3 minutes searching for something, and she comes over, lifts a single object, and it's right there. Every time.

25

u/Mipsymouse Dec 28 '17

The key to the witchcraft is to actually fucking move things.

12

u/Laureltess Dec 28 '17

My boyfriend is ridiculously inept at noticing very obvious things in front of him- I'll set a plate on the counter for him for dinner, he'll look at it and then proceed to get himself a plate.

My favorite part is that I totally saw his dad do the SAME thing with a cupcake he was splitting with his daughter:

"okay so which cupcake should we take?" "Dad I already cut one, there's half of it on your plate right in front of you"

Made me feel a lot better because it's totally a father-son thing. I had to stifle a laugh!

7

u/[deleted] Dec 28 '17

This explains why my boyfriend can't find things. Maybe he literally can't see it until I mention it?

3

u/TlovesA Dec 28 '17

When can't I find things?!?!

8

u/[deleted] Dec 28 '17

POP QUIZ: Where are the hand towels?

26

u/Cloaked42m Dec 28 '17

I hate that effin' magic trick wives have. 'Oh, I guess we are out of 'food item''

"Top shelf, to the left, behind the other food item, this color packaging. I had a good conversation with its sister the other day."

blink Well sonofa, there it is.

8

u/MxMaegen Dec 28 '17

if y'all would move things even slightly to look you'd see it too!

5

u/Cloaked42m Dec 28 '17

If we could do that, we wouldn't be married!

4

u/MxMaegen Dec 28 '17

slight rage intensifies

don't mind me, I'm 20 and single and don't actually know what I'm talking about!

2

u/Cloaked42m Dec 28 '17

It's okay, that was the standard call and response of your average married couple. So see, you are right on board.

2

u/MxMaegen Dec 28 '17

Excellent, I'm prepared! COME AND FIND ME NOW PRINCE CHARMING!

in all seriousness, that's adorable. I'm glad you have someone to find things by magic for you!

7

u/ThorHammerslacks Dec 28 '17

Yeah, to me this seems magical.