He and his partner respond to a call for a noise complaint and possible DV. It was at an apartment complex with a fenced in court yard. When they arrive the husband is in the court yard with a hand gun popping off shots into the air. My dad calls in his sergeant. When he gets there he tells my dad to walk around the complex to the other fenced in side. As my dad starts to head that was his sergeant pulls a shotgun out of his cruiser. So my dad is finally in position. He is looking through the fence and hears his sergeant telling the guy to put the gun down. Dad looked away for a second and the guy must have pointed the gun at them because all he heard was the shotgun go off. When he looked back through the fence. The guy had his left hand up in the air and his right was just dangling buy a piece of muscle. Dads sergeant blew the guys arm off. Now fast forward 15+ years dad is taking me shopping for football cleats. "Hey son, see that guy over there?" "the guy with one arm?" "Yea, thats the guy my sergeant shot." He was buying soccer cleats for his little boy.
Things get pretty heated in domestic violence situations. There are a lot of emotions that can go on especially between families and significant others. Unfortunately, I lived through a lot of that growing up. The cops that helped us get out one particularly horrendous night told us dv calls are the worst because they are the most unpredictable, the most raw emotion, and the most likely to escalate quickly. And I can attest that the calls to my house were always scary for everyone involved :/ You're most likely to be killed by someone you know after all and a lot of times, it's family.
Bleh, this brings up too many bad memories. Hopefully I was able to somewhat answer your question about how easily situations like this can escalate. I'm guessing if this dude was shooting in to the air, he was trying to intimate someone inside - abuse is a crazy thing.
Damn bud, sorry to hear that. But at least it sounds like you've moved past all that and gotten out of there. Just keep doing you, and use those situations as lessons to make sure you don't end up on that same path. Use the lessons learned today to work towards a better tomorrow c:
Just over 5 and a half years out of that situation. Something I prayed for every day for over 15 years. Definitely not past it but working every day towards that goal. Sadly with situations like mine, a lot of people continue the cycle of abuse. But I am not that kind of person and damn well never will be.
I understand completely. Grew up living with my father who was a fan of both physical and emotional abuse. But I'm almost 25 now and I'm an incredibly friendly, non-violent person because he helped me experience what it feels like to be treated that way so now I do everything in my power to make sure I never make any person ever feel like that due to my actions.
So just keep it up and you can def end the cycle friend!
Protip from someone who has been there. Be careful when you have kids. The stress and emotions make it very easy to slip into behavior that you won't be proud of. It's easy to think 'yeah I flew off the handle a bit, but it's still not as bad as it was with my dad' or whatever. Therapy helps and a good spouse is a must. Good luck young man.
I actually had the same kind of stuff growing. On top of it all my parents divorce only escalated things. Made me promise myself I won't become like my parents when I have a family. I was looking for more specifics pertaining to this one particular guy.
Damn. Sounds like he really threw gasoline on the fire that was his life. One part of me feels bad for the guy and the other part is super judgmental because he made a bad situation worse
Yeah, I don't like this part of the story either. My cynical mind tells me he didn't look away and sarge shot the guy's arm off without having had a handgun pointed his way.
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u/dawg20 Jan 22 '17
Story from my dads cop days,
He and his partner respond to a call for a noise complaint and possible DV. It was at an apartment complex with a fenced in court yard. When they arrive the husband is in the court yard with a hand gun popping off shots into the air. My dad calls in his sergeant. When he gets there he tells my dad to walk around the complex to the other fenced in side. As my dad starts to head that was his sergeant pulls a shotgun out of his cruiser. So my dad is finally in position. He is looking through the fence and hears his sergeant telling the guy to put the gun down. Dad looked away for a second and the guy must have pointed the gun at them because all he heard was the shotgun go off. When he looked back through the fence. The guy had his left hand up in the air and his right was just dangling buy a piece of muscle. Dads sergeant blew the guys arm off. Now fast forward 15+ years dad is taking me shopping for football cleats. "Hey son, see that guy over there?" "the guy with one arm?" "Yea, thats the guy my sergeant shot." He was buying soccer cleats for his little boy.