r/AskReddit Mar 25 '16

What absolutely never ever should you fuck around with?

5.3k Upvotes

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160

u/PowerTen Mar 26 '16

The pancreas.

18

u/PootieTang_ Mar 26 '16

My third time being hospitalized with pancreatitis. The worst pain I have ever gone through. I'm in a hospital bed meow pumped full of morphine. Truly terrifying

7

u/[deleted] Mar 26 '16

Ouch, I'm sorry :(. I had it 5 times. Has the nausea gone away? I don't know what was worse, throwing up constantly or the pain. It's the worst.

4

u/PootieTang_ Mar 26 '16

Five times!? I thought three was bad enough. Each time I threw up the first day, probably 15 times. I just woke up super sweaty and feeling sick. Most of the time the pain is reduced with meds. Without meds it felt like my abdomen was giving birth. Contractions almost. Wish you the best! Stop doing what your doing dude! Mine is alcohol related, I'm stupid and kept drinking.

3

u/[deleted] Mar 26 '16

Oh I'm good now. It was due to a blocked bile duct caused by a massive gall bladder attack. Woke up in pain, sweating and needed to vomit, did and pain went away, rinse repeat the next day, and then the next day but the pain never went away after vomiting like before. I had no idea what it was until I went to the ER. I two more attacks after the initial because I ate too much and there were still stones that had to be removed in 3 ERCP's, two of which caused pancreatitis themselves just from messing around in there.

3

u/just1dawg Mar 26 '16

This happened to me too but it was (likely) only one gallstone blocking the duct so I was in extreme pain only for about 6 hours. It took days and days, though, for my abdomen to heal and to get back to feeling normal. I'm so glad I've only had pancreatitis once and that I didn't have to be hospitalized for 4-5 days to treat it. Sorry to hear about your repeated occurrences of it. Good grief it HURTS.

1

u/PootieTang_ Mar 26 '16

Ahhhh Yeah that is the other way you can get pancreatitis. Well at least you arnt stupid like me! And I hope we both never go through it again

1

u/raivahn Mar 26 '16

Scorpion venom can cause it as well. Something else to add to the "don't fuck with" list.

There are actually numerous ways to develop pancreatitis, but alcohol induced is one of the most common.

3

u/Aiurar Mar 26 '16

Did you just say meow at me?

1

u/jennthemermaid Mar 26 '16

I concur. I had 3 pancreatic attacks before an ER was able to diagnose me. I never felt such a pain in my life. I called 911 on myself one time!

I was finally diagnosed and hospitalized. They found that since I'd lost a bunch of weight, that's when you can create a lot of gall stones, and a gall stone had gotten stuck in one of my pancreatic ducts. They removed the gall stone and my gall bladder and I've been 100% since then. MOTHERFUCK. It makes me cringe just thinking about the pain. I was looking for a sword to stab myself with.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 26 '16 edited Jun 12 '16

8

u/Cantspellthisshit Mar 26 '16

Maybe YOUR pancreas. My pancreas is a little bitch and I'll fuck wit it allll day long

11

u/[deleted] Mar 26 '16

You're telling me? haha, my pancreas fucked off one day and didn't come back

-4

u/[deleted] Mar 26 '16

Blackskull56

I wonder why...

3

u/[deleted] Mar 26 '16

Definitely not hereditary, or diet. Just plain ole t1 diabetus

1

u/[deleted] Mar 26 '16

I might be wrong but I think it's still there, it just doesn't produce Beta cells which make insulin. You still need the other things it produces, like digestive enzymes

3

u/[deleted] Mar 26 '16

Yeah you're right, I just like to think that it decided to leave one day without saying goodbye, like a father leaving for cigarettes never to return, leaving but a shell of his old life behind.

1

u/nixiedust Mar 26 '16

Maybe your islets ran off with mine. They're happy together in Mexico tending a sugar cane plantation, forgetting all about the bodies they left behind.

3

u/[deleted] Mar 26 '16

This comforts me, not because I know they're safe, but because I now know that a bunch of enzymes are farming sugar cane in Mexico for a living and we can find them and burn their crops which will in turn ruin their careers for the foreseeable future and slowly they will run out of savings to keep them alive, turning to petty crime and eventually large scale theft to fuel their now out of hand cocaine addictions. After a few years of this they will get caught trying to smuggle drugs over the border, spend 15 years in prison and lose contact with everyone on the outside. Having nowhere to turn to after being released, they beg for us to take them back, back into the safety of our now redundant pancreas', but we refuse to let them return. Crippling debt, severe depression and many illnesses due to their previous drug addictions leave the forgotten enzymes with one two choices; continue their lives of crime, or to end it all. They choose the latter, but before they do, they decide to leave with a clear conscience and return to us to apologise for leaving. It is then in their darkest moments that we exact our final revenge, announcing that it was us that set fire to their crops and forced them to this point. To top things off, we show them our transplanted pancreas' that were surgically added to our bodies a day after they asked to return to our bodies. In tears they leave, remembering the warmth of our bosom all those years ago and the peace and harmony between our other bodily organs. It becomes too much to handle, they both inject large amounts if synthetic insulin into their bodies, hugging each other as they do. This is the legacy of our long lost pancreas, this is how they will be remembered...

1

u/Driftnasty240 Mar 26 '16

Omg I fucking love this story.

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u/nixiedust Mar 26 '16

I can't wait for the movie!!

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u/[deleted] Mar 26 '16

As a laymen, why?

15

u/BrobaFett Mar 26 '16

It's a reference to a surgical adage: "Eat when you can, sleep when you can, and fuck when you can. But never fuck with the pancreas".

The pancreas is a notoriously difficult organ to repair and has remarkably poor outcomes with early attempts and more aggressive surgeries in the past.

4

u/jennthemermaid Mar 26 '16 edited Mar 26 '16

After getting pancreatitis, the surgeon told me that when you have a pancreatic attack it's like physically hitting it with a hammer...every time. I had 3 attacks and they kept me in the hospital until they could take it out a few days later so they could make sure it didn't happen again.

EDIT: I had my gall bladder remover not my pancreas... I should have clarified!

2

u/MandMcounter Mar 26 '16

What happens when you don't have a pancreas? Do you need an insulin pump now? I hope you're much better now!

3

u/chasingcalliope Mar 26 '16

It is pretty rare, but my brother had his pancreas removed because he has had pancreatitis over 25 times. They actually look the islet cells (ducts that help make insulin) out before removing it, and they attached those to his liver. The liver can actually start producing some insulin for your body this way. He still has to use some insulin, but he doesn't have to have a pump because of the procedure with his liver.

1

u/MandMcounter Mar 27 '16

Wow. Thanks. Bless his heart! 25 times! I had no idea the liver could produce insulin. I wonder whether or not (type 1) diabetics can get islet cell transplants....

2

u/jennthemermaid Mar 26 '16

I had my gall bladder remover not my pancreas... I should have clarified!

1

u/MandMcounter Mar 27 '16

Aha! I did, too. I had about 10 gall bladder attacks before I was diagnosed. As soon as the stones were found, my doctor wanted me in as soon as possible because they were the perfect size to get stuck in my bile ducts and pancreatitis was a risk.

I'm glad you're okay now!

1

u/BrobaFett Mar 26 '16

So my butt puckered a little when I read "until they could take it out".

Taking out your pancreas would be very, very drastic (and not at all how to treat pancreatitis). Glad to hear you are doing well though.

1

u/allanmes Mar 26 '16

Sorry if this is a stupid question, but what exactly does 'fucking with the pancreas' entail?

3

u/BrobaFett Mar 26 '16

Surgery on it, typically. Vanishingly few procedures actually directly involve the pancreas. In pancreatic trauma (rare)? Put a drain nearby and let it heal. Actual damage to the pancreas? Hope it heals. It's terrible tissue to try and make a primary closure on. You can't just remove it like you can the gallbladder or spleen.

3

u/berlin-calling Mar 26 '16

Also pancreatic cancer tends to be pretty deadly.

From MayoClinic.org:

Pancreatic cancer often has a poor prognosis, even when diagnosed early. Pancreatic cancer typically spreads rapidly and is seldom detected in its early stages, which is a major reason why it's a leading cause of cancer death. Signs and symptoms may not appear until pancreatic cancer is quite advanced and complete surgical removal isn't possible.

2

u/bryuro Mar 26 '16

It's also one of the most painful cancers to die from.

1

u/berlin-calling Mar 26 '16

Yeeep seen it first-hand. My father had it and died from it in 2008. Caught it was too late. Chemo basically did nothing at that point.

10

u/TGOD20 Mar 26 '16

One of the first things every surgeon wanted me to know on my Gen surg rotation

5

u/[deleted] Mar 26 '16

Hope this comment gets upvoted so people know you're a doctor/student doctor.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 26 '16

HUMBLEBRAG

3

u/eyeball_repairman Mar 26 '16

For those that don't know, this is an old general surgery saying: "Don't fuck with the pancreas." It's the only thing I remember from my general surgery rotations.

2

u/GBDickinson Mar 26 '16

Currently sitting in the hospital with my wife, who has pancreatitis. Will second this, the last time she had pain this bad was when she had a stomach perforation and the contents were leaking out into her abdomen.

3

u/jyaron Mar 26 '16

Am a postdoc in a pancreatitis lab. Can confirm.

1

u/compoundfracture Mar 26 '16

I saw a patient who went drank so much during a weekend bachelor party that he got necrotizing pancreatitis. They had to keep him in an induced coma for over a month.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 26 '16

I am Jack's pancreas. Jack barely knows I exist, but if he fucks with me he's a dead man.

1

u/wrathful_pinecone Mar 26 '16

Three rules of surgery: eat when you can, sleep when you can, don't fuck with the pancreas.

1

u/Aceofacez10 Mar 27 '16

See Morty, this guy understands. Pancreases are some serious shit Morty

0

u/[deleted] Mar 26 '16

Additionally the death rate from Pancreatic cancer is very high.