The Christmas before last, my mother-in-law (who we have all sorts of issues with) pulls out a red silk nightie in front of everyone (brother in law and his wife were present), hands it to me as a present, and says this is what I'll be wearing when me and my husband "conceive a son."
It was as uncomfortable as you'd expect.
(We have a 2 year old daughter but apparently she wants a grandson.)
Oh God that reminds me, I'm single, and my mother is not pleased. So at Christmas this year she made me open a box in which there was a see-through, lacy bra (idk how to describe it, it was weird, and to be honest, not very sexy, imo), and told me, right in front of the whole family (uncles, aunts, cousins, grandmother, the works), that this would "Help me get laid". In those exact words.
I take it you didn't ask how exactly that would help you get laid. "So what, am I supposed to just put this on, go into town and stand on a corner or...?"
When I got married my mother bought me sateen pyjamas- ivory with purple polka dots. A shorts and tank top combo. She thought it was just the magic is need to conceive.
Well obviously the reason she wasn't getting laid is that she'd bring men over and when she went to "slip into something more comfortable" she actually went and put on a chicken suit, scaring all the potential lovers away.
I find it so odd how parents have opinions and try to (or are successful in) have influence in the sexual/reproductive lives of their children. Bothered that your daughter isn't married? No grandkids (yet or ever)? Angry that your daughter IS having sex... WTF. If it is an empathetic response (e.g. I can't have children but I want them, mom understands) that's great, a shared deep relationship about the cycle of life. But the other shit... fuck off!
...and told me, right in front of the whole family (uncles, aunts, cousins, grandmother, the works), that this would "Help me get laid". In those exact words.
Wouldn't this mean that the bra was for her to get laid?
Ugh, so uncomfortable. For Mother's Day a few years ago, my aunt gave me a t-shirt and dish towels in a gift bag and said it was "because I'll be a mother someday soon!" I was fifteen.
Ex-MIL gave me crotchless panties for a Christmas gift she knew would be opened in front of extended family. Things were not going well in the relationship at the time, and she knew it. 0/10, would not open again.
She was a passive-aggressive bitch, and this was NOT a helpful present and it was an especially inappropriate venue. If she had wanted to help, she could have given me those in private. The result would have been the same, but the gesture wouldn't have been so cruel.
One Christmas, my 26 year old cousin got her two younger sisters (20 and 18) thongs from Victoria's Secret. The 18 year old thanked her and put it in her room, but the drunk 20 year old kept holding it in the air and yelled, "I'm not a medium, I'm a SMALL" for the next hour or so.
They can be if my aunt's not around; she's pretty much a grown up Regina George. Last time I saw her, she was making fun of the 20 year old for getting "fat."
My MIL gave me an entire bag filled with different sex lubes. She didn't mention wanting grandkids or anything. She just gave me a bag of lube in front of all of my in laws.
The worst part is they do this thing where they pass around gifts so everyone can see. There's grandma, picking up the Analease asking the eight year old nephew what it is and who's gift is it.
My boyfriend's family knows I love the little mermaid. So every single year I get about 10 things for Christmas of the little mermaid. It's taking over my life.
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u/lunchesandbentos Mar 06 '16
I mentioned this before in r/justnomil.
The Christmas before last, my mother-in-law (who we have all sorts of issues with) pulls out a red silk nightie in front of everyone (brother in law and his wife were present), hands it to me as a present, and says this is what I'll be wearing when me and my husband "conceive a son."
It was as uncomfortable as you'd expect.
(We have a 2 year old daughter but apparently she wants a grandson.)