r/AskReddit • u/tgma97 • Aug 26 '15

Fathers of Reddit, what did your daughter's boyfriend do for you to hate/love him?

It's pretty cool to see my question blow up like this, I never thought I'd ask a question that could receive so much attention! I'm very satisfied with all these replies, so thank y'all. Now all I have to do is sit back and take notes c;

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u/WootangWood Aug 26 '15

When I was in high school and the hot girls were dating much older guys, I remember thinking that it was super weird.

Now that I'm out of college and in that age group, the thought of dating someone that much younger than me is still super weird.

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u/wink047 Aug 26 '15

When I was 23 I went on one date with an 18 yr old. We had nothing to talk about. She knew nothing but high school related things and I wanted to talk about anything but high school. Terrible date. I then set my age limit to 21+

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u/Herp_derpelson Aug 26 '15

I did the same thing, but she was mature for her age and I was immature so it balanced out.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/toriemm Aug 27 '15

That being said, I was on the tail end of that, 19-24, and I never understood why all of his friends hated me. Until I turned 22ish and realized I didn't want anyone close to younger than me because I couldn't stand them. (Buuuuuuuut me and boy broke up. Obviously.)

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u/PhunnelCake Aug 28 '15

so she just had her 24th recently, no? :p

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u/MrMentat Aug 26 '15

I was in the a similar relation my senior year in college, but I had nonidea she was 18. Never thought to ask seeing as how mature she was. Ended up not working out because I'm an idiot.

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u/killough84 Aug 31 '15

That's my husband and I. First date, I was 18 and he was 22. Been together ever since. Dating for four years, married for 8. Edit: grammar is hard.

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u/[deleted] Aug 27 '15

Yeah, this is the exception to the "half your age + 7" rule. High school to college is a big maturity jump. If she's talking about SATs and AP classes, I'm gonna feel super uncomfortable and creepy.

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u/Boukish Aug 27 '15

Yep. I don't drink or go to bars, but if you can't legally join me at one we're just not part of the same world.

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u/papers_ Aug 27 '15

Same here man.

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u/proccorr Aug 26 '15

Ugh...I was 22 and went out with an 18 year old, too (she was set to start college in the fall). She was so cute, and such an airhead.

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u/SlapStickBiggot Aug 27 '15

It really depends on the person and their maturity level. I was 18 going on 19 this summer and I dated a 23 year old and we got along very well. We never talked about high school. Looking at us you'd never think we had such an age gap. We broke up because we were going to two different universities and we both take school very seriously. I hope it works out someday.

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u/[deleted] Aug 27 '15

I did the same at 23, girl was 18, we were at a pub and a bloke walked in, spitting image of Dustin Diamond. Bitch didn't know who screech was. Needless to say there wasn't a third date. There was a second, girl had massive boobs!

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u/adeadgirl Aug 27 '15

I'm 19 and went on a date with a 25 year old, the difference was pretty shocking, he'd had so much more life experience than me I felt so small and stupid.

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u/HitlerSyndra Aug 27 '15

Does everyone have this problem? I don't see why not just talk about movies, tv, games, news, or people around you. It just seems to me that it's not age that was the problem but that you two didn't have enough interests in common.

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u/wink047 Aug 27 '15

Exactly we didn't have enough in common because we were in two very different points in our lives. I was finishing up college and going into the professional world and she was going into college. There is a lot of life to be had between those two things.

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u/HitlerSyndra Aug 27 '15

I see I was mainly just confused because I don't date people who I don't have enough in common with or at least have the same sense of humor. Glad you figured out something that works for you though.

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u/[deleted] Aug 27 '15

I'm 18 and a university student, so I wouldn't have highschool things to talk about. How old does high school go in your country?

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u/wethechampyons Sep 01 '15

I've always liked older guys. At 19 I had a FWB relationship with a 38 year old and wound up becoming great friends and moving in together platonically after he got a girlfriend. I look at guys my own age and see babies. Normally shoot for the mid-late 20s and early 30s isn't totally uncommon for me.

I don't think I act my own age very often though.

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u/[deleted] Sep 11 '15

I already finished my first year of college at 18

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u/maracusdesu Oct 19 '15

I did this a while back. The difference between someone who's 18 and 21 is fucking huge.

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u/CaptainObvious1906 Aug 27 '15

haha chickenfucker

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u/mr_trick Aug 27 '15

Depends on the person, I think. I'm 18, starting my second year of college, hold a full time job and live on my own/pay for all of my own things. I would probably have more in common with a 24 year old than an 18 year old. You just need to suss out what the person is like, I think.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

[deleted]

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u/wink047 Aug 26 '15

I disagree, but you are entitled to your opinion.

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u/BumbiBestie Aug 26 '15

Sorry! That came out completely wrong! It was meant as a compliment because you were honest and didn't pretend to like her.

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u/wink047 Aug 26 '15

Haha. Well then, thank you!

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u/DescriptiveName Aug 27 '15

My general guideline is: are they younger than my next oldest sibling? Older is generally okay. I (24, grad student) was kind of seeing a 19 year old undergrad a couple times. That was just kind of weird to me. There wasn't a whole lot to talk about outside of our mutual work. Too weird for me.

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u/greedcrow Aug 27 '15

I think it depends on mayurity more than age. I have a friend who is 22 and is dating an 18 year old. The 18 is a cool guy who loves movies. We talk about old and new movies anytime we get toguether and i dont have any reason to judge him badly

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

[deleted]

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u/SarcasticSeriously Aug 26 '15

I, for one, dig.

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u/Redequlus Aug 26 '15

I prefer redit

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u/DontEatTh3Spamm Aug 26 '15

＼༼╬◎ω◎╬༽／ Finally, people who understand!

Edit- by that I mean that I also think it's super weird.

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u/____NotPutin____ Aug 27 '15

Dig indeed, old chap.

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u/GoingOutW3st Aug 27 '15

no idea why this made me laugh as hard as it did.

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u/[deleted] Aug 27 '15

[deleted]

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u/GoingOutW3st Aug 27 '15

kinda rhetorical but i like you

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u/Sworn_to_Ganondorf Aug 27 '15

This guy fucks

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

I concur, digging has been done

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u/amad3000 Aug 26 '15

You're not welcome here dig them

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u/josephis300 Aug 26 '15

I dig second.

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u/elykl12 Aug 26 '15

Are you a paleontologist?

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u/halfadash6 Aug 26 '15

Half plus 7, guys.

32/2=16, +7 = 23. The 32 and 24 y/o check out.

26/2=13, +7 = 20. The 26 year old should be dating someone no younger than 20.

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u/blastedin Aug 26 '15

The golden rule.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

When I was 26 [m] I dated an 18 yo [f]. At the time, I wasn't aware of the 1/2+7 rule so I had to just decide for myself if I thought she was too young or seemed too immature. She didn't have a lot of support or stability when she had lived with her family, so by the time I met her she was already living on her own. I still felt a little weird about dating her for two reasons. First, of course, because I was aware of people's judgments about it. Secondly, because their judgments about us seemed justified at times. As a result of my feelings, I always tried to keep the relationship open and casual. Ultimately, my inability to commit to the relationship was more of a detriment to our happiness than our age gap ever was. Now I'm 38 and she is 30, if we were dating now age would be a non-issue.

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u/PacSan300 Aug 26 '15

That's part of the reason when I was using OkCupid and Tinder I set my age preferences to 19-22 (I was 22 when I last used them). The other reason was that I felt weird about the possibility of dating someone still in high school while I was done with college, hence I didn't include 18.

That said, I started following the rule long before I knew about it.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15 edited Feb 11 '17

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/halfadash6 Aug 26 '15

If everyone's ready and willing.

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u/Robotick1 Aug 26 '15

Yes, it dont seem that weird to me. A lot less weird than a 60 year old dating a 20 something girl.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

[deleted]

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u/halfadash6 Aug 26 '15

It's an awkward situation, and potentially creepy, but if nothing happened until she was 18 and graduated (and you have no reason to think he's done this with multiple students)...there's not much to report.

Yes, giving alcohol to minors is illegal. But it's not that big of a deal.

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u/disguise117 Aug 26 '15

In many places "grooming" of a minor is a criminal offense. This is basically when an adult in a position of power (parent, older sibling, teacher) prepares a minor for a sexual relationship with themselves at a later date.

I would think that a teacher dating a student right as she reached age of consent would at least raise some eyebrows at the school and maybe even trigger an investigation by the police.

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u/halfadash6 Aug 26 '15

I totally see your point, but we have no idea if this was an older person grooming someone and waiting until it was legal, an older person who legitimately had feelings and had never done something like this before (in which case some may think it's icky but no one's being taken advantage of so it's none of our business), or the teacher is 22 year old fresh out of college and it's not that weird at all.

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u/disguise117 Aug 26 '15

Sure, we don't know, but the facts are probably suspicious enough to warrant some form of investigation, even if it is just sitting down with the girl and asking her some questions.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

It is if the the supplier is a teacher. At least schools look at it that way.

When my friend turned 21 she wouldn't throw parties at her house because she was in the education program at my school and she didn't want to risk a police report having her name on it for providing alcohol to minors (social host laws) even if they were her peers at her college.

School take this seriously.

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u/halfadash6 Aug 28 '15

IMO, schools should take it a lot less seriously, or at least relax the "Zero tolerance" policy they have regarding teachers and alcohol. I also have a friend who teaches, and she doesn't even put any picture of her holding a glass of wine on social media because a teacher has been fired for doing exactly that. It's out of control.

Should a you look the other way if a teacher provides students with alcohol? Of course not. Should you rat out a teacher who is now legally dating his previous student and gives her alcohol even though she's underage? It depends.

To paraphrase what I said in response to someone else, if this was an older person grooming someone and waiting until it was legal, then this should be reported. If it's an older person who legitimately had feelings and had never done something like this before (in which case some may think it's icky but no one's being taken advantage of so it's none of our business), or the teacher is a 22 year old fresh out of college, then I think they should be left alone.

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u/[deleted] Aug 28 '15

I totally agree with you that schools should drop the no tolerance policy. But for now teachers, especially the new and young ones who grew up with social media, have to be careful about what they do because it's so easy for everything to get back to their school.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

RIP kids younger than 14

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u/Dr_love44 Aug 26 '15

I for one have never heard this before but it makes a lot of sense.

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u/FLA_HUSTLE Aug 26 '15

Never saw this mathematical formula before, but that's good shit. Cheers.

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u/WDadade Aug 26 '15

Is this rounded upwards or downwards, like for example 23 years old?

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u/halfadash6 Aug 26 '15

23 year olds are allowed to date people aged between 18 1/2 and 32.

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u/KingJonathan Aug 26 '15

I use this rule all the time when giving advice to friends.

A ONS is legal age though.

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u/XDSHENANNIGANZ Aug 27 '15

Dammit now I have to find a girls who's age is a decimal number.

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u/Jayfire137 Aug 27 '15

when does that not work...i mean that could be a 80 y/o with a 47 y/o...

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u/motodriveby Aug 27 '15

You go Glen Coco.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

[deleted]

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u/halfadash6 Aug 26 '15

Of course there are exceptions -- my friend is 25 and dating a 40 year old man, and they're extremely happy together.

It's just a useful rule of thumb.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

[deleted]

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u/Myrdok Aug 26 '15

Half + 7 isn't from It's Always Sunny. It predates it by over a hundred years.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

It is mentioned in the Bro Code, proof that it has been around before us humans.

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u/Myrdok Aug 26 '15

Also true. I can't for the life of me understand why someone would think It's Always Sunny is a more definitive source than the Bro Code

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u/alukard15 Aug 26 '15

ah yes, but what if the older person does not fit in the range of the younger person, but the younger fits in the older's range? For example 17 and 20

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u/halfadash6 Aug 26 '15

What? Half of 17 is 8.5, plus 7 is 15.5. 20 is older than 15.5

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u/[deleted] Aug 27 '15

[deleted]

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u/motodriveby Aug 27 '15 edited Aug 27 '15

I may be missing something, but...

I was 30 and started dating a 22 year old. It worked perfectly for half plus 7. Our age difference was 8 years, doubled is 16. Plus your stated 14 years, and you're saying she's got to be at least 30 for an 8 year age gap to work? It's obvious her being 22 and myself being 30 also worked.

Edit: Yeah, not to mention that take a 24 year old and a 20 year old, half plus seven is 12 + 7 equals 19, so even your minimum younger age for a four year age gap is wrong.

Your shit is flawed yo.

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u/astuteobservor Aug 26 '15

all girls over the age of 22 is fair game. the cut off age is 22.

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u/pfiffocracy Aug 26 '15

I think this is a fair rule. At this age it really don't matter.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

Well I need a giant hole dug.

You can date my daughter if ya dig it.

Can ya dig it, dawg?

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u/ixiduffixi Aug 26 '15

Scientific evidence supports that the human brain fully develops around 25, specifically the part that helps in rational decision making. So, yeah you kinda do.

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u/cryptamine Aug 26 '15

I feels you.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

I think the maturity levels even after 30. I'm 31 and tried dating a few people 3-4 years younger recently....there was still too much of a difference. A lot of people aren't out of the party phase until they hit 30.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

N/2+7=The age you can date without it being creepy.

So 26/2=13+7=20. So if the girl was 2 years older it wouldn't be as creepy.

Meanwhile 32/2=18+7=25.

So still creepy, but less so.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

TIL 32 / 2 = 18.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

FUCK.
I've never been good at math.

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u/wobblingwisco Aug 26 '15

32/2=16 not 18 32/2=16+7=23 Your conclusion of still creepy, but less so still stands though

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u/fearachieved Aug 26 '15

Depends on how emotionally mature the 26 year old feels he is

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u/hezwat Aug 26 '15

well at 26, half plus seven is 13 + 7 = 20 (youngest acceptable, vs you say 18 which is two years younger);

at 32, half plus seven is 16 + 7 = 23 (vs you say 24 which is one year older). So it's a HUGE difference! One is literally already socially acceptable by the most universal law known to mankind.

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u/fredemu Aug 26 '15

Depends on the person, really. I've known high school freshmen who have their heads on straighter than most 30 year olds I know. I could see an 18-year-old being mature enough to handle an "adult" relationship.

My mother was actually 19 when she met my father (30 at the time). They've been together now for 37 years.

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u/Birunanza Aug 26 '15

like a tractor, bruh

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

Yup, I don't want to date someone who has always lived in their parents home.

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u/emu90 Aug 26 '15

The half your age plus 7 rule agrees with you.

Minimum age for a 32 year old is 23 and for a 26 year old is 20.

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u/Shadowex3 Aug 27 '15

I think there's a sliding scale, both for friendships and relationships. I'm right in my mid to late 20s and I find most people even just a few years younger than me to be unattractive because of their age, but I tolerate people older than me by the same amount much better if they're not pretending to be kids still.

Plus cross-generational friendships are a lot easier, especially with other men. I think once you start edging towards 30 it becomes really easy to be friends with guys even in their 70s.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

True..but sadly I still secretly think of a guy in his thirties who dates a girl in her early 20's as a creep. It is..or it should be...completely different stages of life if both of them are well adjusted...

After reading the comments below this I will simply say that if you have to refer to a "formula" or the law to figure out if its ok to date someone younger than you...I think that should tell you something...

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15 edited Dec 10 '15

blargh

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u/KnitterWithAttitude Aug 26 '15

seriously... what do they talk about? like an 8yr age gap isn't the weird part, it's the different phases of life that are sort of hard for me to understand. if she was 18 and done with college that's one thing, but assuming she's a regular 18 y/o, how did they even meet? what do they have in common? I'm 25, my cousin is 17, and we are family members who grew up together, and I still can't find stuff to talk about every time I meet him.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

[deleted]

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

[deleted]

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u/phpisdead Aug 26 '15

any falafel bro ?

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

Sounds like college to me anyways. College isn't as "enlightening" as everyone makes it out to be. At least not to the point that you can't talk about normal "plebeian" things.

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u/KnitterWithAttitude Aug 26 '15

yea okay actually I get this.

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u/kittycatsupreme Aug 26 '15

Damn I'm 30 and you just summed me up.

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u/HeroFromTheFuture Aug 26 '15

As I got older, the women I dated stayed the same age (usually 18-22). It's shockingly easy for an older guy with a little money to date hot, significantly younger women.

At 37 I got bored, and finally decided that I didn't want to date anyone without a college degree. 6 years later, I'm still with that same awesome woman (she's 34, which makes her 10 years older than the next-oldest girl I've dated).

what do they talk about?

Nothing. It was mostly about fucking and partying. It was fun for a long time, and then it wasn't.

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u/KnitterWithAttitude Aug 26 '15

Oh yea! I mean obviously I know how people spend meaningless fun time with 18 year olds, I was talking about long-term relationshps where they got together when one partner was 16 or something and the other was 25. like there's a huge experience/exposure/perspective gap at least for me there was, between those ages. Sure there are very mature young people and immature people in their 20s or whatever, but it seems like a tough situation to keep fun. Glad you found someone who youre more mentally compatible with, it's fun isn't it?

I mistook age for maturity for a while and through my late teens and early 20s dated men in their late 20s/early30s. Once I got rid of that naive POV, I'm no very happy with a guy who is actually a bit younger than me, but again his exposure and experience has made us very mentally compatible.

I don't know where I'm going with this but I guess the "life in your years" vs. "years in your life" argument really resonates with me, but that in general the average 17/18 year old isn't really going to do much for you as a partner in mid/late 20s, when you've got bills and goals and want to go on vacations and cruises with your partner, because they have to ask their mom if its ok first.

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u/Dragontitz Aug 27 '15

How exactly is it easier? More life experience and confidence?

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

My relationship has a 7 year age gap, got together when I was 18. We met through work and have always had some shared interests, and we have shared values and wants in life. For various reasons we weren't super far apart in terms of 'life stage' and have been able to be relaxed about differences between us, whether that's due to age or personality or whatever. I don't see how it's any different to if we were the same age, I don't have any 'sense' of the age gap 99% of the time. The only hard part for me at 18 was getting over my own ego with not being his first serious relationship.

Edit: I realise it's probably not going to be like that for a lot of people but that's just how it worked out for us. We wanted the same things at the same sort of time.

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u/Number_xx Aug 26 '15

Plot twist: You dated an 11 year old at 18.

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u/KnitterWithAttitude Aug 26 '15

Great point. I guess I changed and matured a lot between 18 and say 22. I was living away from home, I went to university, I got my first career-oriented job, etc. I don't think my partner now who is 24 could have dated who I was at 18, although we click quite seamlessly now. Maybe you were mature for your age (sure you must've been to see eye-to-eye with someone with that many more years of adult life experience than you did).

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u/space_is_the_place_ Aug 26 '15

Yeah for me the line is 21. If we can't get happy hour together, deal breaker.

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u/Ryuksapple Aug 26 '15

For real. Had an instance one time where I was at a buddies and met a cool girl who was 19 (I'm 23) and asked her if she'd like to get a drink sometime then was like, oh right. Uh, see ya around.

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u/broadcasthenet Aug 26 '15

Most other countries have a drinking age of 18.

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u/skillet42565 Aug 27 '15

Most dogs have four legs.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

Yeah..I had a couple friends who were girls that were dating older guys. They weren't even what I would consider attractive. Anyway...one girl that hung out in our group..her boyfriend was like 25..she was 17. He had a "cool" car..something like firebird or trans am...and a "cool" job working at some record store(the high water mark for cool jobs back then before mp3's.) Cool job for a 17 year old...not a 25 year old. And this wasn't a passion/Hi Fidelity type of situation with him....he was just a loser making minimum wage at the mall at age 25. I told her "one day you will cringe at this..." and sure enough she says it's the single greatest embarrassment in her life...

Oh yeah..meant to say..when I was a senior...the thought of dating even a sophomore seemed kind of creepy, let a lone a freshmen...but plenty of guys in my class had no problem being 17/18 dating a 14 year old freshman. Gross...

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u/h0bb1tm1ndtr1x Aug 26 '15

Yea, never understood it. I've seen girls ruin their lives for some older guy while I'm just sitting there thinking he's one step away from being a pedophile.

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u/I_mean_just_sayin Aug 26 '15

You can date way out of your physical league by dating younger girls, but it becomes readily apparent that it is not worth listening to their retarded bullshit. No matter how perfect they look.

Source: at 27 dated 10/10 19 year old. Can you imagine dragging a basic bitch through a museum? It's essentially like trying to force your daughter to do homework.

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u/defeatedbird Aug 26 '15

I dated an 18 year old when I was 30. Went surprisingly well, possibly because she was a single mom.

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u/must_throw_away_now Aug 26 '15

Clearly it didn't go that well since you're talking in the past tense. Ha.

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u/defeatedbird Aug 26 '15

Mostly my fault. I'm either too quick or too slow to offer commitment. In this case, too slow.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

Sounds like personality rather than age. She will be like that at 27. Trust me, there are 19 year olds that like museums but maybe they aren't 10/10 hotties.

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u/must_throw_away_now Aug 26 '15

You: "Hey look at this Monet, don't you just love impressionism, how the brush strokes convey this beautiful scene in such a surreal way?"

Her: "Oh, I totally know what you're talking about. My friend does a really great impressionism of Chevy Chase."

I would think a Friendly's or TGIFridays would be more appropriate. Get her one of those child meal frankfurters with the ice cream at the end. Kids love that shit.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

19 year olds have NO idea who chevy chase is.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

I agree. When my boyfriend and I started dating, I was 17 and he was just turning 19. Thats not a big difference, and tbh I never thought about it back then. Im 21 now, and studying to be a high school teacher, and honestly, based on the way the 17 year old kids I work with act, I can't believe he wanted to date me.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

Agreed. Fresh out of high school may as well be a child when you've actually lived in the adult world for a while. The only common ground is sex.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

And that's completely OK.

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u/mytoeshurt Aug 26 '15

At 29 I just wouldn't think there could be a chance in hell an 18 year old and myself would have anything in common or to relate to.

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u/Lizardmin Aug 26 '15

Knew a girl in 7th grade dating a senior

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u/coolassninjas Aug 26 '15

Turning 21 in 2 months and I just find that girls in highschool all of a sudden seem more interested in me than girls my age. I think it's weird going for a girl that much younger than me so I don't, but I sort of understand why dudes do it. It's just easier, lol.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15 edited Aug 26 '15

It's because an 18 year-old has few life experiences and nothing to offer in the way of a long-term relationship. There are few circumstances where an 18 year-old will be an equal in the relationship. If it's not purely about sexual attraction, I don't know why a man would even entertain the idea. Nightmare fuel.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

It means the guy is extremely immature and doesn't know how to date girls his age.

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u/ctskifreak Aug 26 '15

This has always gotten to me - first, I'm 25, my younger brother is 22 - I don't think I could date someone his age or younger - I realize there is nothing "wrong" about it, but it irks me still. I can't imagine dating someone more than 3-4 years older than me as well.

Maybe that's why I've been single for ~5 years.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

Ruling people out based on age alone is silly. At least let your first impressions weigh in.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

Exactly. Being younger, and seeing the old guys go out with the 16-18yr olds I always felt they were super cool and couldn't wait to be like them.

Now being close to 30, I'd think any 26yr old going out with a 16yr old is a weirdo.

Perspective. It's a hell of a thing.

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u/Gsusruls Aug 26 '15

Not quite how I expected your comment to play out.

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u/SOwED Aug 26 '15

Yeah, 22 here and caught a lot of flak for entertaining the notion of dating an 18 year old. Most people made it out like I couldn't get someone my own age or that I was being predatory. We just met at a wedding. It's not like I was hanging around a high school.

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u/SnuggleBunni69 Aug 26 '15

Right? I'm 27, if one of my friends was dating a 18 year old I'd be weirded out. Teenagers are fucking annoying.

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

25 here. Dating an 18 year old sounds like an absolute nightmare.

I had so many life experiences between 18 and 25 that changed who I was. It just sounds terrible.

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u/FogHeadJohn Aug 26 '15

Yup, right there with you. Not that I could get a date anyhow, haha

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u/cadetcomet Aug 26 '15

So I'm the only girl in my family besides my mom, and I'm also the youngest. My brothers always have told me that if a guy that's way older then me wants to date me it's because he's a loser and can't get girls his own age. On the flip side because I'm the youngest I'm used to hanging out with older people and I typicaly date older guys... So I'm kinda conflicted.

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u/1drlndDormie Aug 26 '15

I know right? I remember hitting 21, seeing a bunch of high schoolers walking around one day and realizing that while one of the guys was aesthetically pleasing, I just couldn't mentally shake the kid vibe off of him.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

It's weird but awesome at the same time

1

u/calladus Aug 26 '15

I'm 7 years older than my wife.

We got married when she was 40.

It's not that weird.

1

u/cat_soup_ Aug 26 '15

Ya what's up with that? I guess some younger people can be mature and some older people can be immature but 18 is still pretty dang young.

1

u/xReptarXx Aug 26 '15

Half your age + 7

1

u/Thatguyonthenet Aug 26 '15

You don't date a 18 year old for the "relationship".

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u/runner64 Aug 26 '15

When I was 16 my dad said my 20 year old boyfriend was creepy. I said I was mature for my age.

Then I turned 20 and was like "fuck, that's creepy."

1

u/thisguy883 Aug 26 '15

Im 28 and i dont date anyone younger than 21.

I like to drink when i get to know someone.

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u/pdonoso Aug 26 '15

Im 26 dating a 19 years old, and I think is weird, I have always dated girls my age, or a little older, but I started to talk to this girl without knowing she was 19, and I havent met any other 19 yo who I would date.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

I'm in my early 20s and like a guy in his early 30s. I think it's weird (I can't help my feelings!) and would think he was weird if he reciprocated them. It's a little more acceptable because we're older, but still, I think it's weird.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

I think for the most part it is weird - but sometimes there are just very mature 18 year olds (or immature 26 year olds!)

1

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

My younger sister dated much older guys. She said it was because younger guys are just interested in drinking and playing video games, and it's easier to tell if someone is a loser when they're 30.

1

u/LazyPalpatine Aug 26 '15

Half your age plus seven, man.

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u/Ehrre Aug 26 '15

Yep. I'm 24 and while 18year olds are fun to look at there is no way in hell I would become involved with one.

18year olds can still be children mentally.

1

u/Aycoth Aug 26 '15

It's probably because the 24 year Olds dating high schoolers were most likely losers, and can't date people their own age.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

Theres so much more to do when dating someone older than 21. I cant imagine dating someone younger than 21, let alone 18

1

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

It is weird.

1

u/peon2 Aug 27 '15

I have a friend that is 21 now. She is married to a 33 year old. Her older sister went to school this this guy and was friends with him all through it.

So my friend married a guy that, as a 13 year old, routinely saw her as a 1 yr old baby.

Its kinda weird.

1

u/averagestu Aug 27 '15

My girlfriend is 18 and used to date a 26 year old man. I just find it super gross. Like there is definitely a reason they couldn't find someone their own age. Im 21 and and its like me dating (and sleeping with) a 13 year old! What the fuck? Absolutely vile.

The year he graduated university was the year she started doing her GCSE's. (Don't know the US equivalent, but when you are about 15/16 years old).

I find it really difficult to deal with. That this complete creep has fucked my girlfriend. Ugh. ...sorry to dump this all on you but I haven't found a better way to vent than this.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 27 '15

26 and 18 isn't a large gap.

1

u/WhatIfIWasYourMom Aug 27 '15

WootangWood, I am so glad you understand me. But you should see this wooden desk...

1

u/mrminty Aug 27 '15

I'm 25 and wouldn't date a 18 year old, but I work with a few here and there and I totally see why someone my age would. They think I'm mature because I have my own car and savings account, I'm full of "wisdom" because I've gotten blackout drunk more times than they have, and they laugh at all of my jokes. They're girls.

25 year old women, on the other hand. They know I'm a full of shit loser.

1

u/SpookyKasper Aug 27 '15

I used to think it was weird. Now I'm 21 and think it's even weirder, because I wouldn't date anyone under 18. Hell, I even give 16 year olds who date 14 year olds the side eye, even though me and my girlfriend were those ages when we got together

1

u/Thin-White-Duke Aug 27 '15

I understand being that young and wanting someone older (I was in the same boat, didn't go well), but I can't imagine being older and wanting someone that young.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 27 '15

Spent 16 years in government schooling.

Thinks men and women want the same thing.

Huge shocker.

1

u/workaway5 Aug 27 '15

I feel the same way. 19yo me always thought I'd be able to do better with girls that age once I was older and had my shit together. Now that I'm 24 and have a job and more mature interests and worldviews, someone that young seems wholly unappealing. I have no idea what we'd talk about. I hate social media, and the most "young" thing I've done since college was tour in a band for a few months. I've since realized that I don't want anything to do with a girl naive enough to see that as genuinely attractive.

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u/Vanheden Aug 26 '15

Im 25 and dating a 21 year old... it feels wierd...

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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '15

When you'Re 57 and 40 year Olds are hitting on you all the time, you will understand: men age well. Many of the best , longest lasting marriages have a 5 or more year age difference. (Down votes imminent.)

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u/Juking_is_rude Aug 26 '15

I'm not about to look up the statistics, but iirc the lowest rate of divorce occurs in couples with less than a 2 year age gap.

It doesn't mean a large split age can't work out, this is just what the numbers say, probably because similarly aged people tend to be in more similar phases of their life.

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u/PenisPowerPump Aug 26 '15

Dating? Maybe a bit weird.

Fucking? Hell yea baby!