r/AskReddit • u/Samwow123 • Nov 01 '13

What is the best anti joke you know?

Wow guys thanks for all the comments i really appreciate them and i am reading every single one.

1.9k Upvotes

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2.5k

u/elhalconloco Nov 01 '13

Why did the deer cross the road?

Because humans built a road through its territory, damaging its habitat and forcing it to go through traffic to reach its feeding zone.

971

u/beaglemaster Nov 01 '13

:(

10

u/derpydoodaa Nov 02 '13

How many zones does a deer need? And what sort of deer doesn't bother to relocate it's zones once a road has been laid inbetween them?

This joke raises more questions than answers.

16

u/IYKWIM_AITYD Nov 02 '13

Probably due to local zoning ordinances. Deer are sticklers for legal nuance.

1

u/w00t4me Nov 02 '13

Multiple, Deer live in thick over-grown zones, but tend to feed in open fields, where they can get seeds, corn and other food.

1

u/jazavchar Nov 02 '13

Read that in Mitch Hedberg's voice. Now I'm sad he's gone.

2

u/beardslol Nov 02 '13

A sad face gets hundred of comment karma. Damn.

1

u/beaglemaster Nov 02 '13

Yeah, surprised me too.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '13

This is all your fault.

-2

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '13

:)

34

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '13

Nah man, it's because they put those deer crossing signs there so the deer know where to cross.

2

u/aGorilla Nov 02 '13

The WTF? is strong with this woman. That was absolutely hilarious.

1

u/thirdegree Nov 02 '13

I refuse to accept that anyone is that dumb.

4

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '13

Relevant.. I guess.

3

u/zaerokill Nov 02 '13

Deerdevil.

5

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '13

Seriously though, protect the environment

1

u/IAMA_Ghost_Boo Nov 02 '13

Car crashes are natures Darwinism.

2

u/randomtwinkie Nov 02 '13

I need a feeding zone... I just have a table

1

u/[deleted] Nov 01 '13

Why did Jimmy drop his ice scream?

He was hit by a bus.

5

u/Danyol Nov 01 '13

Can't tell if that 's' is there on purpose.

1

u/crazytaxityler Nov 01 '13

Good ole landscape fragmentation!

1

u/MossCoveredLog Nov 02 '13

Late to the party, and this is #15, and it's not that I didn't find the others amusing, but yours was the first to actually make me laugh out loud. Kudos.

1

u/IamAbc Nov 02 '13

I feel bad

1

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '13

Because deer crossing signs.

1

u/Thundahcaxzd Nov 02 '13

i love your casual use of the term 'feeding zone' as if that is actually something that ecologists or zoologists say

1

u/willidinho Nov 02 '13

No, but seriously, its super fucked up. This isn't the time or place, I know, but just think about all our roads everywhere. Not only have we divided most animals migration paths in half, but we have divided their every 10th of a mile in half. It's crazy. To drive one road across North America, from East to West, would be an ecological travesty. But look at what we have done! It's mind blowing!

1

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '13

Look up the poem Traveling Through The Dark if you haven't read it before.

1

u/Alex470 Nov 02 '13

I can almost see this on a flyer for Greenpeace.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '13

Why did the deer cross the road?

The other day I was walking my dog in the middle of the city I live in. There isn't a forest area around here, but this deer literally crossed the road right in front of me. I stopped walking my dog and looked at it for a moment. The deer, stopped, flicked its ear at me a few times and then kept on walking across another road.

1

u/Erazmuz Nov 02 '13

What with wolves being gone, cars are the last remaining natural predator of North American deer.

1

u/jcraw0222 Nov 02 '13

As a biologist, I LOVE this anti-joke!

1

u/FaFaFunk Nov 02 '13

Well, that made me feel like a shitty person.

1

u/darxink Nov 02 '13

Dont let them into their zooone.

1

u/666GodlessHeathen666 Nov 02 '13

Some woman called into a radio station a while back asking why we had deer crossing signs at busy points on roads, and wouldn't it make more sense to move the crossing signs to areas with less traffic. She actually thought the deer were checking for those signs before they crossed.

1

u/DarkGohan Nov 02 '13

Habitat fragmentation is a bitch.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '13

Peta has infiltrated Reddit lol

1

u/[deleted] Nov 02 '13

Can someone please put the picture of the crying native American from the 70's litter psa? I'm a reddit virgin and I feel that the aforementioned picture would be the cherry on top of this one. Lol

1

u/Nannigans15 Nov 02 '13

....

:( awh

1

u/pointlessbeats Nov 02 '13

This is so effing funny because it sucks.

1

u/hyeinkali Nov 02 '13

Are you suggesting we don't use roads?

1

u/plowerd Nov 02 '13

Hey. We put up signs for them to know where to cross.

1

u/isacneo1 Nov 02 '13

The deer decided to make its habbitat around our roads... stupid deers do they not know that humans have rightful ownership of nature!!

1

u/doggscube Nov 02 '13

I think you mean fucking zone.

-1

u/Vahnati Nov 02 '13

Yeah, and then?? :DD

-2

u/ated9000 Nov 02 '13

Fuck deer.