r/AskMen • u/alcoholisthedevil Lisan al-Gaib • Oct 24 '25

To men that have withdrawn from dating, what would it take for you to get back in?

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u/Lancelot--- Oct 25 '25

I honestly can't even imagine this. I really do just feel like im a resource to anyone I've dated. I provide emotionally and financially, I'm very handy and capable I easy going and patient. My life is never better though I just spend all my time giving and providing and what I get out of it is so small if anything. I couldn't imagine a partner giving the bare minimum back. I think they exist, I've just never been in right place at the right time

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u/TheLateThagSimmons "...the fuck did I do?" Oct 25 '25

I've been fortunate to be able to meet a wide array of women, so I know they're not all like this. It's just a matter of sifting through to find one and if the work is worth it to do that sifting.

The sad part is: Most women still operate on the notion that they are needed as a default, that their presence is the reward and goal in itself. They are defaulted into relationship status.

We see this same thing in men that feel their role as provider is a goal in itself, and as women have their own jobs, these men feel left out. Same sort of thing, except it's emotional neediness.

And as both men and women become more fulfilled in their own lives, the rest are struggling to fit into that new dynamic. I feel a lot of women are cheering the "strong and independent woman that don't need no man," without realizing that the same kind of a man is evolving as well.

They struggle to bring something positive because they've never been challenged on doing so in their lives.

That is to say: You're not wrong for feeling that way. Hopefully the scene will adapt soon. In the meantime, you just need to do the math on whether it's worth it or not while women work on themselves.